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Profiles on dating sites

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I feel rather crap at the moment because I don't get any messages on a certain website from any women.

This is what I've wrote. Please tell me what I'm doing wrong!!!

Hi all
I'm a caring, romantic guy who can be shy when I meet new people (Once I get to know someone better I come out of my shell a little bit). I'm a nice guy once you get to know me. I've been called sweet in the past.

I can listen to any type of music as long as its not heavy metal or 'head-banging' music. I'm an amateur photographer who takes photos of landscape and macro. I love going course & game angling. I go walking in the Yorkshire Dales and other areas when I can. I also go cycling once in a while.

I enjoy almost any film/movie i.e. Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings, Despicable Me, Predator, Avatar, The Aviator etc etc. And I don't mind the occasional chick flick.


I would get to know someone if you don't live too far away. If you have a car, then that would be a bonus then I won't have to do all the driving lol. Of course, I don't mind if you don't have a car!

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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    seems ok to me! :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I feel rather crap at the moment because I don't get any messages on a certain website from any women.

    This is what I've wrote. Please tell me what I'm doing wrong!!!

    Hi all
    I'm a caring, romantic guy who can be shy when I meet new people (Once I get to know someone better I come out of my shell a little bit). I'm a nice guy once you get to know me. I've been called sweet in the past.

    I can listen to any type of music as long as its not heavy metal or 'head-banging' music. I'm an amateur photographer who takes photos of landscape and macro. I love going course & game angling. I go walking in the Yorkshire Dales and other areas when I can. I also go cycling once in a while.

    I enjoy almost any film/movie i.e. Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings, Despicable Me, Predator, Avatar, The Aviator etc etc. And I don't mind the occasional chick flick.


    I would get to know someone if you don't live too far away. If you have a car, then that would be a bonus then I won't have to do all the driving lol. Of course, I don't mind if you don't have a car!

    All the highlighted points are negative. Take them out. Using negative language will put your target audience in a negative frame of mind, and detract from your message.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah I would find the last bit a little off-putting. I'm already self-conscious about not driving so I'm not going to date someone who might see it as a flaw.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sounds pretty boring.

    on dating sites the competition is really large and if you are just offering "lemons. meh, bit lemony. are alright, might cure scurvy." and someone else is offering "OMG XXL LEMONS, MAKE YOUR VAGINA TASTE LIKE CINNAMON, YOUR HAIR GLOSSY AND IT FILES YOUR TAXES" then the average girl surfing www.lemon-sale.com won't buy your lemons.

    Just saying how it is.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I feel rather crap at the moment because I don't get any messages on a certain website from any women.

    This is what I've wrote. Please tell me what I'm doing wrong!!!
    I'm sure we've already been through this, but what the hell...

    For starters, you should look at the OkCupid subreddit, specifically this page.

    This is my profile and I've had a few compliments on it.
    Hi all
    I'm a caring, romantic guy who can be shy when I meet new people (Once I get to know someone better I come out of my shell a little bit). I'm a nice guy once you get to know me. I've been called sweet in the past.
    Get rid of, "Hi all". In fact, re-write this whole paragraph:

    I'm a reserved, but romantic guy, looking to meet someone awesome to share a few drinks with. My friends describe me as being sweet and caring and once I've got to know you a little (NB: use "you" instead of "someone" in cases like this, makes it seem more personal, somewhere deep in their subconscious) I really come out of my shell.
    I can listen to any type of music as long as its not heavy metal or 'head-banging' music. I'm an amateur photographer who takes photos of landscape and macro. I love going course & game angling. I go walking in the Yorkshire Dales and other areas when I can. I also go cycling once in a while.

    I love music, and will listen to most types. My favourites are (list a bunch of artists here, nothing too "girly" or teeny-bopper because that would make a girl go, "whut?").

    I also love photography, taking photos of my walks in the Yorkshire Dales, or on my fishing trips, whenever I have the opportunity. I especially like shooting landscapes as (reason why you like taking photos of landscapes - not just "because they're pretty", bullshit a bit if you need to).

    I enjoy almost any film/movie i.e. Harry Potter, Lord of The Rings, Despicable Me, Predator, Avatar, The Aviator etc etc. And I don't mind the occasional chick flick.
    No offense, but that's not really a wide range of movies and most of them are slightly childish (Harry Potter, Despicable Me (and don't get me wrong, I LOVE Despicable Me, but if a guy put that on his profile I would go :|), and to an extent LotR and Avatar). The only one which strikes me as a "guys movie" is Predator. Stick in a few more action/thriller movies where the girl can hide behind you when she's scared. It's all about appealing to their subconscious.

    Also change it to, "I'm really into movies, and will watch any genre - even the occasional chick flick! A few of my favourites are..."
    I would get to know someone if you don't live too far away. If you have a car, then that would be a bonus then I won't have to do all the driving lol. Of course, I don't mind if you don't have a car!

    Get rid of this whole paragraph. It's horrid. For a start, never use "lol" in your profile, or in your opening messages. Just don't do it. If you find something a girl has said to you to be amusing, write, "haha" or something. Just don't use "lol".

    Aside from that, you're supposed to be promoting yourself to her, not whittling down your chances by saying, "if you don't have a car, I don't mind, but I'd really prefer if you did because I don't want to be driving you everywhere".

    If you want someone closer to you, then put:

    Ideally, I'm looking for someone who lives pretty close to me, but of course I would be willing to travel a little further if you're very special :).

    Even if the last bit is bullshit. Make them feel like you want them to feel special.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you've got a massive wang then you should probably elude to it - or at least post a picture of you posing in a banana hammock. Girls pretend like that they want to talk about their feelings, play dress up, make lists of the favourite boys and watch Twilight movies, but they'll drop that thin veneer of femininity for a thick and meaty spam cannon.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you've got a massive wang then you should probably elude to it - or at least post a picture of you posing in a banana hammock. Girls pretend like that they want to talk about their feelings, play dress up, make lists of the favourite boys and watch Twilight movies, but they'll drop that thin veneer of femininity for a thick and meaty spam cannon.

    This is absolutely true.

    Er, anyway...

    One other thing, Mr Ferrari - what do you write in your opening messages to girls? It's very rare that I'll read the profile of someone who's messaged me unless they've messaged me something interesting.

    Also with regards to the films thing, it might not seem like a big deal, but I have absolutely vetoed people because of what they choose to put in their movies section.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Also with regards to the films thing, it might not seem like a big deal, but I have absolutely vetoed people because of what they choose to put in their movies section.

    That's because you're a fascist. I'm pretty sure Mr. Ferrari doesn't want to date a fascist.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's because you're a fascist. I'm pretty sure Mr. Ferrari doesn't want to date a fascist.

    If someone has put Stardust or The Shining as one of the movies they choose to tell the world they love, I don't want to date them. The former because...really, Stardust? The latter because I will end up in an argument about how shit that movie is and how it destroyed the whole book and...I am not going to get into a vent about that movie on here :p.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I feel rather crap at the moment because I don't get any messages on a certain website from any women.

    This is what I've wrote. Please tell me what I'm doing wrong!!!

    What you're doing wrong is being negative about yourself when you need to be positive. That, or have franki write your profile for you, as her edits beat your attempt.

    When you're writing to impress, you need to use positive reference throughout and stay clear of any word that can be seen as negative.
    Contrast-
    I love to meet girls with puppies, and enjoy a few drinks over a good meal
    and
    I like girls, but not girls with cats, and sometimes I go out for a meal, but not any place too expensive, and I don't have that much to drink.

    See?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    mist wrote: »
    i love to meet girls with puppies

    :d
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you've got a massive wang then you should probably elude to it - or at least post a picture of you posing in a banana hammock. Girls pretend like that they want to talk about their feelings, play dress up, make lists of the favourite boys and watch Twilight movies, but they'll drop that thin veneer of femininity for a thick and meaty spam cannon.

    this just made me giggle out loud :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This is my profile and I've had a few compliments on it.


    bloody hell okcupid profiles are loooong!

    mrferrari...not to say this in a harsh way but what are your pictures like? because lets face it. the first thing everybody looks at is their pictures, before they even read the profile sometimes. are they flattering? are you smiling, having fun with friends maybe? is one of your pics a picture of your car? after that, the first thing i notice about peopes profiles are quirky boys. random facts about themselves is good as it gives you something to start off conversation. franki gave some good tips. just copy and paste that :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    bloody hell okcupid profiles are loooong!

    mrferrari...not to say this in a harsh way but what are your pictures like? because lets face it. the first thing everybody looks at is their pictures, before they even read the profile sometimes. are they flattering? are you smiling, having fun with friends maybe? is one of your pics a picture of your car? after that, the first thing i notice about peopes profiles are quirky boys. random facts about themselves is good as it gives you something to start off conversation. franki gave some good tips. just copy and paste that :D

    Haha, they aren't all that long :p. Mine is, but I've been on there a while and it just kind of...expanded. I like profiles (and messages) that show a bit of effort has been put in without taking themselves too seriously.

    Anyway, yes, photos are probably more important in the short term. You don't have to be a stunner, as long as you look like you're having fun. A headshot, a body shot and a shot of you with friends are all pretty important, but obviously you can add more.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When I wrote a profile a while back it was basically me saying how amazing,awesome,cool,funny,interesting,great and brilliant I am and if you dont like it I will wind you up constantly and laugh at you,all in a tongue in cheel kind of way.

    I got loads of messages actually.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Anyway, yes, photos are probably more important in the short term. You don't have to be a stunner, as long as you look like you're having fun. A headshot, a body shot and a shot of you with friends are all pretty important, but obviously you can add more.

    We should date. I'm cripplingly beautiful, but completely vacant. I'm a basically a meat toy.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    We should date. I'm cripplingly beautiful, but completely vacant. I'm a basically a meat toy.

    I would say yes, but that would involve you coming to see me and you never want to do that as it is ;).
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    We should date. I'm cripplingly beautiful, but completely vacant. I'm a basically a meat toy.

    Was yesterday's date your use by or best by? ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Leaf wrote: »

    I got loads of messages actually.

    i got a fair few messages but they're always bald :|
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nowt wrong with bald, it's a solar panel for a sex machine.

    Apparently.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No offense, but that's not really a wide range of movies and most of them are slightly childish (Harry Potter, Despicable Me (and don't get me wrong, I LOVE Despicable Me, but if a guy put that on his profile I would go :|), and to an extent LotR and Avatar). The only one which strikes me as a "guys movie" is Predator. Stick in a few more action/thriller movies where the girl can hide behind you when she's scared. It's all about appealing to their subconscious.

    Also change it to, "I'm really into movies, and will watch any genre - even the occasional chick flick! A few of my favourites are..."

    I disagree with the point that putting childish films on your profile will deter anyone, i would see it as something we have in common (especially if it's really cheesy and kinda awful but you both like it)

    Oh, and I like stardust. so... there. :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    skakitty wrote: »
    I disagree with the point that putting childish films on your profile will deter anyone, i would see it as something we have in common (especially if it's really cheesy and kinda awful but you both like it)

    Oh, and I like stardust. so... there. :p

    Yes, but sweetie, you're dating Johnny. Your taste in men is somewhat debatable ;).
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LOL my taste is.. unique? like a special snowflake.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the messages.

    I too like stardust lol


    This is the link to my Profile (website deleted)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the messages.

    I too like stardust lol


    This is the link to my Profile

    Considering you posted the contents of your profile on here, is it such a good idea to post a link to the profile?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the messages.

    I too like stardust lol


    This is the link to my Profile

    You're all crazy. That film is godawful.

    Anyway, first thing I will say is that you have a couple of spelling mistakes on that list of interests thing. "Whitesnake" and "Lostprophets". Fix please.

    Second thing: You've put "Drinking: Prefer not to say", but you've got a picture of yourself with a pint. So, er, why do you prefer not to say, exactly?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I agree with the suggestions on this thread and with regards to photos, do you have any more that are with friends or in a more kind of natural setting than the middle two?

    I have been on match, eharmony, pof and Okcupid and I must say PoF is probably the worst out of all of them for meeting quality people. You should also keep in mind that girls on these sites usually seem to get many many more messages than guys, so you're always in competition for their attention. A lot of it will depend on what you put in your first message. Internet dating can be harsh!

    ETA: I don't like your strapline much - "where are all the girls??" It would put me off as it makes it seem like you're just desperately looking for anyone. But that is me being incredibly picky.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I used to be on PoF and just found it to be a waste of time, not many people seemed to take it seriously and those that did were just creepy.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    FireFly85 wrote: »
    ETA: I don't like your strapline much - "where are all the girls??" It would put me off as it makes it seem like you're just desperately looking for anyone. But that is me being incredibly picky.

    :yes: That would put me right off too.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Perhaps its just me but the word “lol” really bugs me unless its an obviously funny post. It means I don't know whether to take what is being said seriously or not. Obviously when talking face to face you can tell when someone is being sarcastic or making a joke from their voice and body language but a “lol” on the internet can be difficult to interpret.

    I'd get rid of that last paragraph as I think its off putting.
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