If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Take a look around and enjoy reading the discussions. If you'd like to join in, it's really easy to register and then you'll be able to post. If you'd like to learn what this place is all about, head here.
Comments
independent_
It's more productive than a kick up the arse. :razz:
This is actually a nice idea - thank you.
I am no longer someone to be emotionally manipulated; made to feel bad about myself. Sod that - I've had 16 years of being emotionally battered by her. Mum can sort out her own rubbish tonight without me. I'll not be an emotional punchbag - ever again. :mad:
We told her we wanted to fly out out after Christmas and meet her. Form a family tie so she could become part of our family, and we looked forward to hearing back..
Then about an hour ago this woman emailed my partner and I, and told us goodbye. Except it was the hurtful way that she wrote. She didn't have to write so nastily. But the tone of her letter broke my heart and Dixie's also. We don't know what it's going to do to Mum, but I guess that like us she will be badly hurt.
I've been abandoned so many times. Some people, they just can't help themselves but hurt others. Because it's in their nature, and the worst is ingratitude.
Twelve years and she's gone, blocked us in all areas. I don't know when I'll get over the loss, for abandonment seems to follow me where 'ere I go. It's just that I can't take people being horrible - and I don't see why I should have to. However, even though she's gone from our lives, I'm determined to make this Christmas the best.
That is terrible!
But later we're taking her and my sisters to our favourite tea & Coffee shop for Elevensies coffee and munchies. Cheer them up!
Thank you for being here for me.
Julie
Then i get rude customers who have literally just walked into the shop, asking where mens belts are, then I just say theyre some where in the mens section somewhere, then they say where is that, so say the direction, then they want specifics of the belts, omfg go check yourself will come aross it sooner or later, fml so fucking lazy, then they get pissy i do not know exactly where in the shop tbey are, of corse i dont they move it around all the fucking time and if its not in my section i have no idea. Then even if i do know i never get a thanks. I never walk into a shop and ask where womans section is, i walk around first and know im gunna come aross it at some point ffs.
And all i can hear is customers saying "i cant stay in this shop any longer" how i mange to stay for 4 hours and not cry, i really dont know. Last time i do overtime and im dreading the weekend soo soo much. Its always busy on weekends but near christmas is the worst and everyones stress heads buying presents.
Aww well I hope you had nice coffee and cakes and that it cheered you all up😊😊
Aww, bless you, Eleanor, we did, thanks. Mum became especially cheerful when I ordered a massive plate of Chelsea buns. They are utterly delish, and I have a recipe for them. They are truly worth making. At least in quadruple quantity.
Thank you for the support. :rainbow2:
It's not a problem! Mmmmmmm cakes!!!
Mum's got Elizabeth David's Chelsea buns recipe. When first tasting them I thought they were the most scrummiest cakes out! Laters I'll ask her for the recipe and post it on my Spanish recipe thread.
Got me drooling now, haha.
EDIT - ignore, I managed to fix it - there must have been something stuck in it cuz I fixed it with my nail 😂
what's a Chelsea bun?... :pancake flip:
Here you are, Bubbles!
https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/food/ic/food_16x9_448/recipes/chelsea_buns_95015_16x9.jpg
She's been on remission for ten years and now the cancer returned. Thankfully a carer and our neighbour was with Mum and have stayed with her until we rushed home, but the flights home were full so we had to take a private jet. A nasty wind caused our plane to "crab" to land, but the pilot was good to explain what he was going to do to land the aircraft. Turbulence had made me chuck up. The up side of private jetting was we could take home all our PA equipment left stuck at home. The down side was arriving to the hospital several hours longer than intended.
Dixie drove instead of me cuz I was almost out of my head. We arrived at the hospital to see Mum looking poorly, but comfy. Her consultant oncologist said the cancer had moved to an intimate part of her body and had spread. He said Mum may survive the new year but theres no knowing. After lots of X-rays they began treatment, radiation and f knows what else.
Abigail for kindly giving me that Carers link so Mum had a carer with her all the time.
My sisters are very distressed.Its going to have to be one day at a time now. Typical to be a fortnight before Christmas.
I am already living bereavement. There is no knowing when our beloved Mum is going to pass away. Christmas is a terrible time when our dearly beloved mother is slowly slipping away. But at least Mum is happy, comfortable and content in our local hospice, and that brings a little more lightness to one's heavy heart.
Thank goodness for Belle. She is the light of my life right now.
There is no getting out and it's a big concert. People have paid good money for their tickets, so we have to fulfill our obligation because it's the law and I don't want my band to get in trouble and get a bad name.
Just scares me that Mum will be all alone that night.
I know, Jules. But she's comfortable at the hospice and being lovingly taken care of. We must, and this is vital, fulfill our legal obligations to our agent and importantly to our new fans who have bought tickets. I promise to look after you, Sis.
Today the roads are dreadful. Motorists are so rude! But it was good to come home to a nice pot of coffee and biscuits.
I know how it feels, @Esme17 .
Mandy my sister is constantly on my back, but like your siblings, grudgingly she looks up to me and Jules. Our sisters may tease, they may dig and make jibes, but when all is said and done they do care for you, like mine care for me.
Our parents or guardians have their own worries, but that doesn't mean their getting on at you is personal. They still love you and want the best, so you must obey help them where you can because like me you live under their roof so have to abide by home rules. It's not all about you, dear. It's all about swallowing criticism and making the best of what you have. With your parents, like my mother, it's known as Tough Love.
Have you heard of 'Tiger Mother'? Here is the definition
"a strict or demanding mother who pushes her children to high levels of achievement, using methods regarded as typical of childrearing in China and other parts of East Asia." .
OK, I'm French and not Asian and though mum is dying, still she maintains a tough stance on me. Despite my hard upbringing, I am truly grateful. Hard though it was, what I am today is all down to her.
Take a day at a time with your family. Remember they have problems. Reaching out to them could make a lot iof difference.
Belle x
Thanks for that Belle. Its all good now, was just the other night but its been sorted. I am very grateful for what they have done for me and always will be
Esme x