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Can someone please please help me?!
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Wow - I really do feel for you.
I don't want to come across as a complete arse, but do you really think that having this baby is the right thing to do?! I know you want to keep it, and I doubt you've thought of much else, but you've no support network (I honestly hope it improves), nothing, it seems. It sounds like your name is utter mud amongst everybody you know.
I really, really do hope that things get better for you. Please don't do anything stupid with vodka or anything else, but I really do think you need to look at the BIG picture here. Again. It sounds like, for now at least, you're going to have to do this completely and utterly by yourself! I'm coming up 30 this year, and forget the fact that I am a bloke, but that would scare the crap out of me.
I'm not saying that having a termination is a simple thing to decide, but at the moment it seems like you are an outcast. I'm one of the strongest people that I know, as few things phase me and I deal with things very well, but the thought of having utterly nobody to turn too would possibly be too much, even for me. If you do decide to still go ahead with this, I'm not sure how you would cope, going on your last few posts. They don't come across well at all, and I'm becoming very concerned.
I can't get rid of the baby. I can't explain why, but it is wrong. People aren't ever going to forgive me. It is the only thing I have left. So without my baby there is nothing. But it would be so much easier to have an abortion. Because as time goes on people will hate me more and I will get more abuse from people at school. Strangers will look at me as though I am scum. And my mum will carry on hating me.
What is the point of me being here? This is one big pile of shit and I hate it so much and I wish it never happened and I wish I wasn't here.
So, you're contemplating taking yourself out of the equation, but not the baby? I think that is quite a serious downturn in your mental state. Have you spoken to your mental health worker, or school people, about this specific point?
Exactly the point I was trying to make.
I've not really been in a similar situation, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want my "friends" to be people who are only nice to me because I did what they told me to and wouldn't be otherwise...
I'm not really referring to friends. Her entire family don't want to know. I'd much rather have my family around me for something like this. Friends at 16 don't always last into your 20's etc.
i'm not telling my mental health nurse. she will section me. then my mum will go mental and hate me more. and i really dont need that.
if i die then everyone is happy. no me & no baby. but if i have an abortion then i am still unhappy and people will still hate me.
I think this is a big mistake.
(I'd really think the above was obvious...)
Totally agreed there.
Fair point. But if everybody has turned on you, then you really do have to start thinking about things differently in a situation like this.
A lot of people may say "Oh, just think about you and the baby", but when it really does come down to "just you and the baby", as nobody else will be involved at all, then I think that comes a little unstuck.
It's not helped by somebody that sounds like she is a pretty shit person (her mum). I'd love to be able to offer this girl a helping hand, if I could.
It sounds harsh and probably won't help, but people are being unbelievably selfish in the way they're treating you. They don't deserve for you to care what they think. I know there's probably no word for how difficult this is for you, but if you can you should try to concentrate on your plans for the future. You will be ok.
like what? abortion?
I can't.
1. You're suicidal, yet don't want to terminate.
2. You won't tell your nurse, and so won't get some of the only support you have.
3. You have seemingly no other support from friends or family.
You really need to speak to a professional about this as you seem to be backing yourself into a corner. You said before that the baby is the only thing you have right now. Do you think this is the reason you are clinging so tightly onto it? Not to say that is the only reason.
I think g_angel is saying that how you're feeling isn't good for the baby, and if you hurt yourself because of it you'll hurt the baby too. But whether you have an abortion or not has to be based on how you feel. Adoption is another possibility.
You need to make the decision. From what you've said so far, I think you've proved your mature and responsible enough to decide what you want to do.
That's certainly a big part of it.
What is for damned sure, and what cannot possibly be disputed is the simply fucking dreadful treatment of this girl by people she should be able to rely on.
everything is such a fucking mess.
i rang my mental health nurse.
:crying:
Maybe your mental health nurse is the best person to talk to about the lack of support.
What have I done?
i can't do this. i hate it. i hate me.