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Demonising fat people
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I give up. You just don't listen, Rachael.
I think the problem is you were both replying to two different things, and the wires are a bit crossed. Let's move on
You're right, she hasn't.
Any issue is with them, not you.
Jim V was very open and frank about his experiences, and it's something that struck a chord with me.
As people who have posted on here for ages will know, when I was younger I suffered from a fairly severe psychiatric condition that I'm only really recovering from now. I self-harmed, I was lonely and chronically depressed, I used to make myself sick after meals. From all that I took comfort in food and in alcohol, and funnily enough my weight shot up.
I'm much better mentally now, and my weight has dropped. It's not a coincidence. But I'm still overweight- I'm not excessively obese, although my BMI says I am. I walk, I used to cycle until my bike broke, but i don't go to the gym and I don't do home exercises.
Why? Because I'm fucking terrified of gyms, of being the fat sweaty cunt in the corner. I will never have a 'perfect' body, and I don't want to be humiliated in a gym somewhere. As for home exercises, I wouldn't know where to start. And don't even start on competitive sport; I play football like Frank Lampard, and that isn't a compliment.
I don't exercise because I suck at it, big time, and I don't have the confidence to go and humiliate myself. I'm sure I'm not the only one in that position.
It is true that people who eat more than they burn off will put on weight. But "eat less, do more exercise" is not the most helpful advice. It immediately puts people in a defensive viewpoint; it immediately makes them feel like failures. It makes me feel like a failure, and that's not something I'm good at dealing with because of my past. You wouldn't say to a heroin addict "well just stop shooting up", or you wouldn't say to a self-harmer "well just put the razors down". It's perfectly accurate advice, but you know that it's not as easy as that.
I think there have been a lot of unfortunate posts on this thread, not just ricardo's gobshite, but I don't think they are malicious. I would expect go_away to understand where I'm coming from more than most, so I am a bit surprised, but when one can do something easily one can't understand why others can't. I can't understand why women can't read maps;)
I'm sorry you're finding it so hard to respond. Never mind.
It puts me off them more than makes them appeal to me.
Seriously, I had *plenty* to respond with but it was sooooo not worth it for the hassle it would've caused.
You said that exercise should be more accessable to people.
I said that some people may choose not to access that exercise out of choice. Not everyone who is overweight wants to lose that weight and could -shock horror- be happy with the way they are.
Yes, situations differ, but there is always some opportunity to throw some push-ups, crunches in - say, when the bairns are in bed.
I know that it won't be perfect but anything is better than nothing if you actually want to get some exercise in, and it takes 5 minutes to whack out 3 sets of 20 pushups (for example).
See - this is where it's gone wrong. Purplebutterfly wings said that. Not me.
I responded saying there are plenty of options out there and that it really couldn't BE more accessible.
See?
i know the drill, you eat healthy balanced meals, you go to the gym/go jogging/ go to aerobics etc etc, but no-one really discusses how to change your thinking, it doesn't seem to be taken seriously as a mental problem and i wouldn't be suprised if this was the case for more fat people, coz for alot of people they know what they need to do , it's just for whatever reason they can't.
Someone said to me that some people subconciously use fat like a suit of armour, they don't lose weight coz of the intense fear of what it may bring - self evaluation, success, relationships, self confidence...for people who don't have these things it can be a terrifying thought.
i've always been told i'll fail and so far i always have, at least i know where i am and it isn't scary. i would love to lose weight but until i deal with my mental issues i don't think that i will be able to lose weight unless i have a gastric band or some other such drastic proceedure which will physically stop me from eating, because the binge demon is too strong when i am low. Maybe if the mental health services were better funded or equipped there would be less people who are overweight. It doesn't stop me trying though.
i'm not even sure if what i said is relevent or not but i wanted to contribute.
Naked push-ups?
A lot of my postage and ranting comes down to frustration at some of my family members, which has projected itself in some posts on here
But going to the gym for me was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I'm glad I did it, and I had the confidence to force myself to go, but in the beginning, I was terrified of even having to adjust the machines. And when you're the only woman working out the the free weights area, that feeling is x1000, alongside the feeling that you shouldn't be there, and should stick to 'girls exercises' such as the cross trainer. Even now, sometimes I have to stand my ground (one twit tried to take my bench as I was setting up, then he proceeded to stand with his arms folded, watching me press).
Almost a year later, I still feel sometimes that I'm being watched but by and large, I'm perfectly happy with going. Yes, I do moan at times when people don't follow the 'house rules' but that's not to dissimilar from people who don't let others off the tube/train first, you get used to your environment and expect others to follow suit. But, whenever I've seen an overweight person coming into the gym (a uni gym at that) I think bloody good on them, there's no way I would have even started at the gym if I had been overweight. The good thing is, gyms aren't for everyone and there's no hard and fast rule that they're the best or only form of exercise.
And I hated PE and my teachers were sadistic fuckers (and I hope they're reading this
And then with what nicebutdim23 says, a bit of re-programming for the brain, perhaps self-NLP or something would help with the motivation to exercise and the circularly negative thought patterns that lead to bingeing.
Maybe you could just read my input as it is. Never mind eh, cleared up.
:razz:
:yes: MoodGym helped me loads
I just checked that out - very good indeed. I think that would be useful if needed
But when you compare our life styles in this country with many others we are lazy - driving and using public transport where we could walk or cycle for instance, and we eat too much, certainly more than we need to - and that's greed. I'm guilty of soemtimes.
http://www.wellcomecollection.org/exhibitionsandevents/exhibitions/medicinenow/index.htm
As Angel has said the options for activities are endless. What's wrong with exercises at home. I often work up to 15 hour days, and that may still be a little way off looking after kids from dusk till dawn, but for me there will always be time to look aftr my health.
When I hopefull have kids I'll try my hardest to keep in shape for a number of reasons. Not only will I live longer, I'll hopefully be setting a good example. Apart from the old drunken puff I've pretty much given up smoking which is still a battle I face every minute of every day. It's certianly harder than finding a couple of hours a wekk to do some activity.
I can see genuine reasons why people eat too much, addiction to food for what ever reason as I said before is as real as any other, but I can't see any really good reason why people can't find the time to do activity. If you don't like sport or have a fear of humilation than what's wrong solitary activity on a rowing machine at home?
How did you manage to force yourself? It's something I've been thinking about for ages. I'm holding my weight at the minute with a fairly lazy lifestyle, a bit more exercise and I'd see a good result.
I'm genuinely interested, because I can't find the courage to do it.
Skive: how the fuck am I meant to find the money for a rowing machine? Seriously. I can't even afford to replace my pushbike.
They're pretty cheap now actually.
Pusbikes are available for 10 quid out the freeads. Power walking, sit ups, push ups - any arobic type excersises? The great thing about excersise is that it doesn't have to cost a thing.
For some reason unknown to me, I let that comment slide. Had I been more vulnerable I probably would have gone home and eaten my body weight in donuts.
Anyhoo, we were also on holiday with my boyfriend's friend, and he used to be an athlete and would train professionally. So we had some discussions on fitness and nutrition, and I made my resolution that I would start eating better. Admittedly, my diet was pretty good then, but I needed to eat smaller meals, and snack in between. I pretty much had to undo everything that every magazine or women's dieting article had told me.
So when I got back, I joined the gym. I had no idea how to start at home (nor did I want to - I wanted a range of equipment) and jogging on Clapham Common seemed like a fate worse than death.
I don't know what possessed me to get through those first few months. I remember on my first day, going into the freeweights area and picking up the lightest weights there (and struggling with them). I think part of it came down to the fact that because I'm a woman, I'm expected to not be able to lift as heavy (never expected to be lifting 1.5x my body weight 11 months down the line!).
I think part of it came down to stubbornness, another came down to thinking, "If I don't do this now, I never will do" and another came down to thinking, "Sod it, let them think what they like, if they're looking at me, they're not working hard enough"
Within a couple of weeks, I stopped feeling any fear, I felt at ease there (it also helped going at the same time, so I became familiar with the regular people) and the weight started to go. I think even some of the Adonis 300-movie-figure type people get a bit nervous in coming and trying out.
But like I said, gyms aren't for everyone and there are loads of things you can do at home with some cheap dumbbells. Find your niche, enjoy it and continue from there.