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Is it shallow to be attracted to attractiveness, and look down on others?
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I don't think it's very healthy that you spend so much time trying to achieve an "ideal" and find the partner who fits this ideal. You're reading other people's books for tips in becoming popular? That's not the right way to go about things cos you'll just get lost, what do you want, genuinely? I think you're obsessed with image and reputation and it's making you come across as a sad twat.
So save us all the time of reading through mountains of posts and just say what you actually want to know. I understand there was an original question and many have answered that only for you to shred their replies so surely there is some other agenda for this thread that hasnt been covered thus far?
What loyalty have you got when you said earlier that they'd drop you like a hat if you for some reason became disfigured etc. Thats the time you need friends most not for them to f*ck off just because you've had an accident of some form. Thats certainly not showing loyalty and it's not true friendship. Sorry but I think you have a very misguided idea of what friendship is and for that I am truely sorry for you. What an emotionally lonely life you must leave. Yes you might have people to socialise with but there is far more to life than that to stop it being lonely.
I'd actually beg to differ there. I have some amazing people as friends who'd go out of their way to support me and make sure that I had the support I needed to get back on with my life as best I could. Yes I'm not saying all my friends would by a long way, but I doubt for a second any of them would run because I couldn't give them something for once, it would more be a feeling of uselessness of not knowing what they could do to help me that would make them run.
It's a shame that you see everything having to be a benefit from a work and career aspect. Work should be there to allow you to live life, not to be your life. A person can give so much without needing to be beautiful on the outside. it's the inside that counts and can brighten a persons day and help make a person happy. If only you'd stop and try to meet some of these "ugly" people you may just realise what you were missing out on.
Comments like that are frequent between female friends when they put up attractive pics of themselves on online profiles. Is that 'shallow'??
I don't think it can be classed as shallow. What are you trying to say is shallow about someone complimenting someone else? It may be 2 faced if it isn't meant or could be an empty compliment if said because it was deemed appropriate to give a compliment at a time you wouldn't necessarily compliment someone, but I cannot see anything shallow about it.
Although I've never really seen comments like that...it's usually "omg you look wasted again"!
What a load of rubbish. I wouldn't say they're 'friends', tbh.
I'm sorry but thats bollocks.
Not everybody is a shallow and selfish as you. Jomery you are going to live a very sad existence with that attitude..
Do you know anyone who has some kind of socially responsible job? A nurse, a council worker, a charity volunteer? Or are they beneath you socially? Many of them have excellent degrees from good universities - they've just chosen to help other people instead of helping themselves.
I counsel a lot of wankers in my job and the worst ones are the previous high flyers who had it all. They lose the lot and they're fucked - emotionally and financially. That's karma for you I guess.
The kind of reputation that you are so proud of would make me ashamed. I'd much rather be known as tolerant, kind, helpful, and witty than "an oxbridge grad 9/10".
However, humans look for more than that - all the various qualities people have stated through this thread. So after the initial attraction stage people look for more. You don't seem to understand this and are just looking at the attractiveness of the person - which IS SHALLOW.
followed by: Yeah, queen of tolerance aren't you there petal!!
Beauty comes from within - I could walk into a room full of people and instantly fancy some of them - when I walk out, the ones I fancy will probably be the ones I didn't even notice at all when I first walked in.
I like to go to nice places but they don't always have to be expensive. I would rather be with nice, interesting people, than in a posh bar with horrible snobs looking down on others.
If you're a true friend to them then you make time to do things that everyone wants to do, not just expecting people to fit in with the places you want to go and things you want to do. Maybe you deserve the shallow, half hearted friends and life you have.
To be fair, maybe you know some strange people because most of the teachers I know feel very satisfied from their jobs and are quite happy and cheerful people. Although I'm sure if you go on about your 6 figure salary and how much better your high flying city mates are, as much irl as you do on here it's enough to make anyone depressed and miserable.
Funny, because I'd much prefer a night out with people who are able to let loose and not worry about what everyone thinks of them. Seems your "friends" might not have as good self-esteem as you think, just like you clearly don't.
My friends did TeachFirst etc so are (trying to) teach in some of London's worst inner city comprehensives = lots of abuse, uncontrollable classes, sounds like hell. I'm sure teaching at a good private/grammar school where people are well-behaved would be a pleasure.
Kids will be kids whatever background they are from!