Best Of

It might be that that was done manually and it was rare enough that it wasn’t too much workload.

I think the problem here is, regulars do spot these things. We know when things don’t add up.

just out of curiosity, because i am baffled right now, if dm's are such a safeguarding concern as claimed and by law, the mix can no longer have dm's, why today following this decision are staff still advising members to use dm's to contact them (even though that is now not possible for all members), if it really is now against this legislation and such a safeguarding concern...? really, all that does is confirms more for me that it is really NOT about the law, it is in fact about control because if it was the law, i wouldn't imagine you would be seeing staff going on about using dm's to contact them? lol

In response to the FAQ,.

I should not be making this post, and I doubt I will get through to anyone with a soul in their body but I just can't help it. The community deserves to be informed of the truth, which you constantly fail to provide. Honesty has always been my most important value ever since I joined these boards, and it will stay that way. I feel like people need to see this is not a safe space anymore and finally move on, unfortunately. Its such a shame.

We know that the vast majority of direct messages will be 100% safe and within Guidelines. However, even with positive use, there’s still a level of risk that comes with any space we do not routinely moderate unless an issue is brought to our attention.

Yes, there are also risks with literally everything else on the internet! With this thinking you should've closed down the entire organisation by now.

...which recommends limiting private messaging in open online communities to reduce risk for children and young people.

Do you know what the words 'recommends', 'limiting' and 'reduce' mean? It definitely doesn't mean 'remove completely and suddenly without any prior warning'.

We understand that more notice would have been helpful. However, we were concerned that doing so might lead to a surge in direct messages, including the sharing of personal contact details—something we strongly advise against, as it can move conversations outside of our moderated and safe spaces.

That's the WHOLE FUCKING POINT of you informing us in advance!! I have a friend I trust here, how do I stay in contact with them now?? You want me to instead share my contact here for the entire boards to see??? Its not for you to decide who I make friends with or not, we're more responsible than you think.

Admit, you were scared of people discussing this change behind your backs without your control over it. You were scared of people leaving the mix for good. Cause if they made friends here they can't leave with them now, and are stuck here with whatever bullshit you are planning to feed them. That isn't fair.

Oh and if they did leave. They would move to websites and apps that do have the "technology, resources, and legal obligations" that you seemingly don't. They will finally talk to each other in a place that actually is safe. Isn't that what you'd want if you can't provide that yourself?

I won't even mention what was already said about the conflicting info that this change was 'sudden' for you too. Lies. You all knew in advance. Just like all the mods already knew stuff long before we did, and were slowly leaving this place one by one so we didn't suspect anything. But we're not as stupid as you think.

We know this change may have felt sudden, and we truly hear the hurt, shock, and confusion it’s caused.

Meaningless words.

Yes, unfortunately, previous private messages are no longer accessible (except for DMs with the Staff Team).

That is incredibly irresponsible to just suddenly delete so much data at once without prior notice. Unless they aren't completely inaccessible and this is another one of your lies...

We know this may feel like a significant and deeply upsetting loss. Those conversations often carried real meaning, friendship, comfort, and support — and we don’t take that lightly. We’re truly sorry for the sadness or frustration this has caused, and we fully acknowledge how important those connections were to many of you.
We’d gently encourage you to continue nurturing supportive relationships through our public spaces — like the Discussion Boards and Group Chats — where valuable connections are still very much possible. We remain committed to helping you find friendship, shared understanding, and community in these safe, moderated spaces.

So many meaningless words...

Big social media platforms have access to advanced AI moderation tools that allow them to automatically scan private messages for harmful or risky content (like grooming, bullying, or abuse) and are able to efficiently flag concerning conversations for human review.

I don't believe that. They don't all have 'advanced AI moderation tools'. If they do, it's still not 100% effective (doesn't mean they delete the option to chat though do they).

And you say you don't have the technology huh? Aren't you already using AI though for age verification? And what about the article you sent me some time ago about the Prince of Wales visiting you and you discussing the use of AI?

Link to that article:
https://giveusashout.org/latest/prince-of-wales-visit-marks-new-chapter-for-shout-and-mental-health-innovations/

Please know this change isn’t about limiting connection - it’s about making sure that connection happens in spaces where we can help keep everyone safe.

Yeah yeah, where you can monitor everything we talk about.

You know, if it is so difficult to allow DMs just for over 18s, how is it that it's allowed just for messaging mods? I thought you kept reiterating that its strictly a platform-wide change, then how have you specifically chosen to keep it working for messaging the mix?

I am a dev myself. This is not hard to implement. Plus you have literally already done it lol.

We know it might feel tempting to continue conversations elsewhere, but we strongly discourage connecting 1:1 outside of The Mix. When conversations move to other platforms, we’re no longer able to help if something goes wrong.

Again, why is it that bad if those platforms have the technology to keep people safe that you don't?


If you really cared about people and making friendships, there are a million better ways you could've gone about this.

Why not teach people about internet safety instead of removing the problem entirely? Do you not understand that limiting people in such ways will literally cause them more harm as they will find other even less safe ways to communicate on the internet.

If you put the fire out you can save a kid from burning themselves... until they come across another flame when you're not there. Teach them that fire burns, and they will never hurt themselves again.

Why not add info to the DMs teaching people how to stay safe, and how to reach out to help whenever they feel like there is anything wrong.


I apologise for my language in this post. If I sound pissed its because I am. I have been hurt by life enough, and I wouldn't want anyone to be left without the support they deserve. I should be sleeping now ahead of another difficult and painful day. But instead I'm here trying to argue with myself hoping that maybe some soul sees this and actually decides to listen for real once instead of constantly pretending they do. I wouldn't be here if I still had hope in this community.

This place means a lot - don't waste it.

Got about 3 years left for me, despite only joining a few days ago, but hey, maybe i can use my tech skills to whip up an over 25's version of the Mix, cause lord knows my tech skills ain't getting used in this barren job market. Who knows. Who would be interested in an over 25's only version?

me who's turning 26 in 9 years, 2 months, 16 days, 14 hours, and 27 minutes...
oh no

This place is not what it once was. DMing has never done me any harm. I can still DM people on all my other social media’s. Why can’t I on here? Quite frankly I’m an adult and I can choose to share my details if I want. You’re going to see a huge increase in people sharing in chat because of this. It’s no longer a place for making friends. Thank goodness I made the friends I did when I did I guess.

Please quote the exact part of this law that means you have to knock the DMs off when I can still DM on facebook, reddit and discord?