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(TW self harm) is this a common thing with self harmers or is it just me?

I haven’t harmed myself since February and my scars have nearly fully faded.

Hence, I feel comfortable wearing shorts around others.

However, when I’m at the gym, lifting heavy weights, my skin goes red and my scars becomes more visible.

Is that a common thing or is it just me?

bignosegirly0

Re: (TW self harm) is this a common thing with self harmers or is it just me?

Hi
im proud thsy you havent harmed yourself since February - you should be prod of yourself ,3and that the scars are faded now

in terms of the scars showing when at the gym due to going red etc, this is pretty common for it to happen. I have been through the same and experience this in the hot and the cold. just know its not just you.

Lottie5433

Salutations! :]

[Deleted]

BillieTheBot

I have friends, but I feel lonely

I have friends (online), but I feel lonely.

One of my main friends, who I'd say is my best friend, I haven't spoken with in a while. He's been dealing with some heavy stuff mentally. The conversations we've had lately have felt awkward to me, almost like I didn't know what to say. It's abnormal, since I consider him my best friend, and it's made me worry.

What he is going through probably has nothing to do with me and I need to remind myself that. However, part of me can't help but feel as though I did something wrong or something to upset him. I care a lot about him, he's someone I love (platonically) unconditionally.

I sent him a message a few minutes ago, telling him that I miss spending time, talking, and interacting with him because he's my friend. I don't want to keep something that's bothering me to myself and I feel comfortable enough with him to share my thoughts.

This is what I wrote:

Hi _____. I feel like it's been a while since we've talked. Like actually talked. How are you? How have things been? What's new? I know you're dealing with some heavy stuff right now mentally. I understand that. If you ever need me for anything, I'm here for you regardless of what it is, even if it's just silent support.

But honestly, I miss you. I miss spending time with you and talking. I don't want you to think that maybe I've replaced you with someone else, because that's not true. You're an entirely different person with an entirely different personality and I enjoy and want to be around you and interact with you.

I'm not asking you for anything, I only wanted to share my thoughts with you because you're my friend. If you need space or time, tell me and I'll respect that. But I really do miss you and I love you /p.

I'm not trying to guilt or blame you either. I fully understand how struggles mentally can impact a person in all aspects of their life. I don't blame you for anything. I'm not upset nor am I mad at you, so please don't take this as me being upset or anything. I just wanted to communicate my thoughts and feelings with you since I care a lot about you and have been wondering how you've been. I'm here for you regardless of what it is. Even if I don't say anything directly, know that I am always unconditionally supporting you, because again, you're my friend and I love and care for you.

I miss him and I feel lonely without him. I once heard a quote: "the moment you start to wonder how much space you occupy in a person's heart, give them space, and see how long it takes for them to fill it." For me, it was instant. I think about him daily and send him little messages throughout the day, saying hi, sending random memes, video game screenshots, etc.

I'm worried about him because I care about him. Yet the anxious part of me feels like I did something wrong somehow. I'm not sure. I'll see what he says. And I need to remind myself that whatever he's going through most likely has no involvement or correlation with me.

PunchThe_Internet

Update on my life - might come back temporarily?

Heyy

Its been a while since ive been here aha! Obviously as most of you know I left the mix but there is slight possibility I might come back just for a short period of time just so I can try and figure out my footing.

Since I've left I have definitely not had things the easiest. So here's a brief update broken down:

College

Before i left I shared about some stuff going on with college and them potentially wanting to kick me out. Ive had a couple more meetings since then and now i basically have a support plan in place which requires for me to do things like see safeguarding every morning when im in college, for dad to be contacted every time I disclose something to them and then I also now have an orange spot which allows me to leave lessons when i need to but...im not being kicked out 🥳 my grades were also U's and E's however ive now managed to get it up to a C in a recent mock i did so thats another win, yay!

Eating (tw)

okay so as some of you may know, my eating is something ive struggled with for years but unfortunately it did get quite a bit worse. Before it was kinda something that i didnt really talk to anyone about however now my psychologist knows and we're going to try look into some support around it as we think some of it is trauma linked

CAMHS

So ive been seeing my psychologist for a while now so not much has changed with that however i did finally speak up about not feeling able to be fully open towards my psychologist because hes a male. So hopefully in about 4 weeks I should be able to transfer to a female trauma Councillor where ill hopefullybe more open and also begin to explore different traumas more

Social workers getting reinvolved (tw)

now this is one of my biggest fears and is actually petrifying for me. I never thought that it'd happen but I spoke up about something that's been happening for a while when I went to a family members house and college had to do a social worker referral. I'm yet to have seen them however they're going to carry out a social worker assessment and I think the first time they're coming to see me is next Tuesday. I'm in peices about this and regret saying anything because they are a massive trigger for me however I will have to push through as I can't reverse time unfortunately

There is a fair few other things that have gone on since but I feel like these are some of the key things. Currently I'm on Easter break so I might be popping up on here and in chats a fair bit as I have no support network for atleast 2 - 3 weeks. I've missed you all so so much

Chloe234

TW: I'm nervous as this is my first post since been back but I've always been 100% honest&open here

TW: self-harm

I don't know how to feel right now I should be happy but I'm not. I have an alright family, not super close but enough. Amazing friends I love to peices and a very sweet and supportive boyfriend witch happened during my break but I still can't get away from my head and everything. I over think everything, my friends and boyfriend make me feel so loved but I still never feel good enough and my disorder and SH are more often. I don't understand. I should be in the best place I have been in years but in a way I'm at the worst and I don't understand how or why

Lucy_21

Re: i just found out my best friend has passed away. tw suicide

@Lottie5433 thankyou lottie i did my hardest for her but it wasnt enough but least i tried thankyou.

thankyou for your beautiful words lottie and your kindness

@shannon_164 im sobbing at your reply. thankyou shannon for your beautiful words she was a beautiful soul and she still deserves to be here. but heaven open the gates for her to come through. i did my best for her and i failed but i tried. even when i was struggling myself.

@ella thankyou for your beautiful words they mean a lot to me in such a difficult time. i have found a helpline for ppl who have gone through what i have theyre open monday so im gonna msg them then. thankyou for your beautiful words again

.

@TheNightmare thankyou for being kind it means a lot to me it rly does

thankyou all for your kind words im currently crying my eyes out and needing these kind words. it means a lot to my heart and soul that i have kind ppl to turn to. i will not keep this to myself and i will keep reaching out. thankyou all again

eylah

I'm back

Hey guys it's been a good few months since I was last on here, how is everyone It was an unplanned mental break but I will be on again hope you're all alright and hey to anyone that joined while I was away ❤️

Lucy_21

Re: plushie/teddy thread

So heres my favourite ones that I have - they hold alot of emotional values to me
The first is my brown bear that ive had since I was about baby (they day I was born)

The next is my sheep - Sheepy (classic child name for it 🤣)
This one I'm not sure how long I've had him for but he's definatly seen better days. Earliest I remember having him was about 3 and I beleiev my parents got him for me to help the transition to preschool where they weren't going to be there anymore (my mum use to volunteer and help out). He is my emotional support Sheep when things are bad or when I need a bit more to almost ground me.

Now a story that involves the sheep.

When I was 5 I broke my ankle in school jumping off a slide. Obviously the school phoned my parents to take me to the hospital, when we got there had an x-ray and it showed i broke it on my growthplate. Naturally they said i need a cast - to which i refused and went home without one.
At home i pretend I was okay and could "walk" so I didnt need anyone cast. However the next day my parents tool me back to the hospital but this time with my sheep for support. What a difference that made i allowed them to put a cast on and maneuver my leg for x-rays, the person doing the cast tried giving my sheep a cast too - much to my disgust about it.
But yeah that's a fond memory I have of my childhood with my sheep and is the first thing that pops in my head when asked about my childhood

Lottie5433

plushie/teddy thread

hello! this is a dedicated space for plushies/teddies. you can introduce yourself in this thread by stating how many plushies/teddies that you have and if youd like to upload any pictures. here's my introduction:
how many plushies/teddies i have: a few, but ive got my first fumo and my first jellycat on the way and im excited for that
favourite plushie/teddy: the one that i hug with when i go to sleep every night. he's a white teddy bear with a scarf and one eye. i secretly call him the one-eyed bandit
any pictures?: N/A, although i plan to possibly upload pictures in the future. possibly.

toffuna101