Best Of

@Rose113 See, this is systemic failings at there very worst. And you are immensely brave for being open about this. You deserved so much better. Fuck your bio mom, fuck the foster care system. You are special and you deserved a happy and stable childhood. None of their failings, makes you any less worthy of love. They all let you down and failed, not you. I hope you understand that right?

@eylah that's to be expected with everything that's happened to you this last year, and everything before. Your such a strong person for still pushing forward. Proud of you.

Rose113 wrote: »

@DonnerKebab Yeah places in care at 3 into an abusive foster home

You don’t have to read!!

TW// graphic water abuse & abuse!!!

the time I had in care the woman foster carer would aggressively brush mine and one of my brothers hair and when I was naughty she was scrape all my hair back so tight in a bun and after a few weeks I was loosing chunks of hair…

When we would have to bath she would hold us under the water which was either burning hot if we was naughty or freezing cold if we was good…

We didn’t have a cloth or a sponge we had a brush…

So that’s why I’m petrified of showers and water when it hits my face. I hate physical touch

im so sorry you had to go through that @Rose113 some people really are evil.

Rose113 wrote: »

@DonnerKebab i was put into care on my 3rd birthday whilst my parents were out celebrating my birthday drinking

I’m okay with questions about it, you can ask anything I don’t mind

@Rose113 That just says everything we need to know about them. They are evil people based on that alone. What 3 year old deserves that? What 3 year old is as mentally broken and difficult to know as you claim you were? I'll tell you. Not a single one. It has nothing to do with you as a person, because you hadn't even developed a personality at 3, no child does, and everything to do with the fact that these people have all the moral decency of a north korean missile scientist plotting to destroy the world. They are comically evil people.

Why give a shit about these people or there opinions. Fuck them. That's all i can say about them. I know it's hard because they are bio parents, but they are the furthest thing from a mom and a dad you could ever get. All children should have parents, but not all parents should have children. And by the sounds of it, the firing squad would be too kind to those buggers. If it's any consolation, i got sold for a £2 bottle of cider aged 4 by my uncle, so i know a little about dogshit adults failing us when we were kids. Not as much as you, but enough to sympathise. Your a great person, who didn't deserve that at all.

eylah wrote: »

quote="toffuna101;c-3797090"]

eylah wrote: »

i appreciate you @DonnerKebab it’s his loss

but i think i need to start to love myself better before i can fully love someone else. bc i can’t love someone if i don’t love myself bc im the most important person. we all are

thats 100% true, you need to love yourself before you can love someone else because when you do love yourself the relationship will be healthier. at least thats what i think.

i mean it was very toxic bc of him not me so idk if loving myself will make any difference but i guess so.[/quote]

@eylah exactly. The fact is, not all relationships work out, sometimes because the partners aren't willing to stand by the other through thick and thin. But loving and caring for yourself, nothing can change that. It's not a relationship that can break down, it's not a friend who can abandon you. It's you showing yourself the love you deserve.
If you were 1/10th as nice in that relationship as you are on boards here, then 100%, he was the one at fault. It's not only a loss for him, but a tactical nuke losing you, and he'll see it one day.

eylah wrote: »

quote="toffuna101;c-3797090"]

eylah wrote: »

i appreciate you @DonnerKebab it’s his loss

but i think i need to start to love myself better before i can fully love someone else. bc i can’t love someone if i don’t love myself bc im the most important person. we all are

thats 100% true, you need to love yourself before you can love someone else because when you do love yourself the relationship will be healthier. at least thats what i think.

i mean it was very toxic bc of him not me so idk if loving myself will make any difference but i guess so.[/quote]

maybe he needs to love himself as well. well, i dont know anything about him so he could be a narcissist for all i know though.

@eylah then he wasn't the right person for you eylah. You deserve somebody who would stick by your side through everything and anything. So what if your up and down constantly, he say's that like it's a bad thing. And problematic? A good partner helps their other through difficulties and problems. That he didn't and left is a 100% dick move from him, and you deserve so much better than that. A little quote i once heard: "The trash appears to have taken itself out".

I fully understand why it would be hard to open up again, and and why your hurting so much right now, but i promise that there are people out there, who will love you and care about you, which is what you deserve. A proper partner. It's probably hard to see now, but one day, you'll have it. Loving somebody too hard, that's what the best relationships are made of.

Not at all @Rose113 , you deserve that help. It's not hogging anything, you deserve it. I'm glad your finally getting some kindness from them and the guy was nice. Was the next person nice too?

@toffuna101 Somebody who loves you for you. I know it's a small consolation, but there are genuinely nice people out there who will love you for who you are. You are a great person on here. And that is the truth. Sure, your condition and the kay walker filters out all the people who just want to be with you for sex alone, but think of that as a good thing. You know, that when you find somebody, they will be by your side for you as a person, not based on looks, and not for sexual stuff, but you as a person. Looks fade, medical challenges happen for everybody and every relationship, and you will have the benefit of having somebody who is with you from the start of a relationship with similar struggles at the start. Think of it as an early loyalty test. Automatically filtering out everyone apart from those who love you for you. When you get into a relationship with somebody, your relationship will be stronger than one which is weathering no challenges. It's a small consolation, but it's something to consider.

eylah wrote: »

i would get so annoyed if they started saying rude shit aha i could never go to one even though they’re paid to be rude, sometimes they take it to far lol. but its up to you!

Same haha. It's social anxiety's worst nightmare lool.