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If your whole brain and outlook is geared around life being a sack of poo, then life not being a sack of poo really does deeply challenge a lot of deeply-held views about life, the universe and everything. If your whole outlook is that things will go wrong, then the very core of yourself will be seriously challenged by things going well.
You'll learn to get used to it. But quite often depressed people want happiness, but can't actually cope with it when it happens. It's not a stupid thing to happen, its more common than people ever think.
i know this. but you still wanna tell yourself to shut up the moaning and smile because everything's dandy.
and the sack of poo metaphor made me giggle because i am immature
If not, ring the samaritans, just talk to a human voice.
I'm worried about you pet.
My doctor changed me to that from Fluoxetine 20mg yesterday. The fluoxetine wasn't helping, and he said that this one helps more with anxiety, but I wanna know if it's any good?
but like we always say, every drug affects people in individual ways. only way is to try them and see.
I know all drugs are different for everyone, but just want to know the general response .
But as the others say each drug effects people differently, it could be great for you.
Bollocks . I really hope I don't get that, mine are bad enough as it is!
remember you have my number honey if you need anything
So you do care.
Now you need to think about what it is you care about, and why you care about it.
You need to think about what he did for you, and why you need him. I suspect you don't need him per se, you just need someone. talk to human voices.
The fact he doesn't feel the same will hurt, of course it will, that's normal. It is a rejection of sorts. You'll recover from it in time.
Samaritans: 08457 909090
call them now, both of you. or email jo@samaritans.org
they have talked me out of suicide before now. you owe it to yourselves to give it a go.
please take care girlies xxx
Remember though that no matter how bad things at the moment they will get better, but only if you give it time for it to do so. Its a cliche but suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem and if you have suicidal feelings but have the determination and courage to carry on it can only make you a stronger person afterwards. Please at least talk to someone and let out your feelings... it really does help.
Well if that is the case, it means that things can only get better. Which they inevitably will.
Just stick out the ride, and you'll get where you want to be in the end.
Is there nothing you can do to change the situation?
Anyone you can talk to?get help from?
Well you will be if you have that attitude.
Think about it for a bit. You won't be, will you? Five years is a long time, let alone fifty.
Perhaps you need to not have such over-optimistic ambition. You won't be a supermodel, but fuck, none of us will be. So what?
I don't want to hear that I can talk to someone, because there's honestly not many people that I can talk to. I don't want to hear that it's not that bad, because I know fine well that it's not that bad. But I can't help feeling that it is...
And there's a big difference between what a person knows and what a person feels.
The fact is that I'm emotionally unstable. I know that. I can't deal with myself. I don't know what to do with myself when I feel a certain way. I don't know how it happens either. It comes over me all of a sudden; a wave of sadness, a wave of grief, a wave of an intense emotion. I'm not emo. I'm not doing this for attention.
This has been going on for too long and I'm fed up. I don't want it to happen any more. It's a problem. I want to do something about it. But I don't know what can be done... I've tried and tried... but emotions always get the better of me. Heart over head.
Anyone have any ideas?
Bethany.
I know it can't be easy, I lost a huge amount of self-esteem when I lost my job, but don't let the bastards drag you down.
Just givethings time and whilst you're working in your job, set things up at home for you to look forward to when you come back... For example treat yourself to some yummy smelling bath salts, or some chocolates, or have one day of the week where you go to the cinema.
Thinking on the basis of rewards like that has helped me a lot in my jobs.
hi, i've never been to this site before but it looks like a very useful one. My name is jo and i have a slight problem, i myself suffer from very minor manic depression and am finding ways to deal with it, but my friend who i won't name, is the nicest person anyone could ever meet, she is overly kind and generous, but i am so worried about her you would not believe. She is going through a mojorly tough time at the moment and feels as though no1 could help her (as though she is at help) she even says she is worried if whe told someone how she actually feels they will section. Ive tried my hardest to get her help and when she eventually went to the doctors they gave her anti depressants but she had a bad reation and cant take them. She is scared of talking to anyone cos whenever she does its as though shes opening it all up and cant stop crying. her behaviour is becoming irrational (even more so than usual shes a bit of a nut) and shes making choices she is majorly regretting and putting it down o a bit of fun. she has talked of harming herself in the past and hasnt found a right path in life. which is a problem as she is a very self aware person so she gets upset that she will never get it right, nor will she ever feel sane or normal. I know she has to help herself but she doesnt feel as though she has the strength too, she has had a hard life and doesnt know how to deal with the situation. As im not the most stable of people it is difficult for me to suggest what she should do and no1 she has seen (ie doctors about anything) have wanted to help her. does anyone have any suggestions as to how i can help her or what i should get her to do. Its becoming increasingly difficult as she is my best friend and she can be dangerous in the wrong situation, and i am not in a very good mental state personally therefore its affecting me worrying so much and taking part of her burden on my shoulders. I would be so grateful of any suggestions or comments you could pass to me. Thankyou if someones actually took the time to read this big post.
I'm sorry to hear that you do it.
Firstly, don't feel guilty for being ill.
There are, if you are prepared to give them a go.
I never used to think talking about it would do any good. But then I got so desperate that I talked to the doctor, and then went into therapy for three years. Best thing I ever did.
If you need to harm yourself to cope, then it is that bad.
There wil always be people with bigger sob stories than you, but depression and SH isn't about the length of the sob story. You don't get more depressed the more shit happens, you are depressed and the shit bothers you.
If you feel bad then it is bad.
I know exactly what you mean, about the suddeness. I won't pretend I feel your pain, but I do know what you mean. Been there, got the t-shirt.
There are always triggers for your reactions. Reactions need a cause. You just don't know what the cause is; more accurately, you do know what the cause is, you just blot it out. You harm to avoid dealing with the problem.
This is why talking to someone else works. It helps you to sound ideas off against another human, to see what they think. They don't need to be good friends, just someone you can trust.
SH is a reaction to deal with pain. To stop SHing, you need to know what you are avoiding. You need to deal with your problems head on; the SH and the depression are symptoms not causes. Work beyond the symptoms and think about what your triggers are.
For me, my triggers were always when I felt that people slighted me, or would think bad of me. So I slipped when people were horrid to me; I also got depressed when I slipped in the street, or if I got slightly embarrassed. It didn't make sense for a long time, then I worked out what I was doing. The SH was a reaction to the pain, not the cause of the pain.
I know.
Few do. And even if you do SH for attention, it shows you have issues.
You do know what can be done, but you find that option too terrifying to contemplate.
You don't like where you are, but doing something about moving is too frightening.
You're going to have to face that fear to move on.
Hope you're alright chuck.
Firstly, the most important thing you can do is be there for your friend. Don't try and save her, don't do anything except listen to her when she comes calling, and be a friend to her. Don't take the responsibility of saving her on, because you can't do that even if you were 100% well- just be there for her.]
She should try and persevere with the doctors, and try and get help for her issues. Doctors hand out the happy pills as a first resort, but if you keep at them they give you more help.
If there are issues in her life causing her problems then talking about it is a vital first step. Perhaps suggest to your friend that there are people who will talk and listen, such as the Samaritans. If she doesn't like the phone she could email jo@samaritans.org. Suggest to her that perhaps she should seek some counselling to help her get through whatever is the problem at the minute.
It's hard being a friend in this situation, because there isn't much you can do. You cannot force her to do anything, you have to let her do it herself. Just make sure she knows you're there.
In time she'll get better, or she'll realise that she needs to talk to people. Make sure you are there when she does, that's all. Don't pressurise her or the trust will go.