Self-Harm journal TW

Brookee

@LorryTruck I just wanted to send a quick message to say that you’re doing so well. I know it can seem like you’re not but recovery isn’t linear. The fact you still get up everyday and try to fight through these feelings is so incredible! I have experience with this so I completely understand how you feel. If you think this is possible for you, I would contact your doctor because they may be able to signpost you to helpful services in your area. I do understand however, that this can be a really anxiety provoking thing. I am wondering if there’s anything you really enjoy doing in the day that can help distract from these negative thoughts? I.e. watching comfort films or listening to a certain band etc.

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Brookee

@LorryTruck I understand where you’re coming from completely. If you think it would help, I can provide you with some information on what the doctor may be able to do to help you? It’s okay if you feel like this option isn’t best for you though.

It’s really amazing that you try these distractions, I understand they unfortunately won’t always be as helpful as you’d expect. It’s really great to hear that you know what works best for you though and you should be so proud of yourself for making sure you’re surrounding yourself with people and things that help you during difficult times.

That sounds like a really great step forward for you. I’m sorry that the support stopped at some point, that must’ve been really difficult. I think it’s great that you’re willing to access support and I would definitely encourage you to try if that’s something you feel would help you.

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Brookee

@LorryTruck Of course! Anything I can do to help! I’ve actually been to my doctor about my mental health struggles. They will most probably resort first to medication, but do know if you don’t want to take medication that is completely fine. Don’t do anything you’re not comfortable with, this is your journey and your feelings and choices are valid. It’s also quite common for some anti-depressants not to work for some people, so try not to feel disheartened if they don’t take.

The doctors may also signpost you to any mental health services within your local area. These might be services that provide support by contacting you regularly to check in, or counselling services within the area. It’s important to note that some of these services again, may not be best suited for you but just make sure to keep letting your doctor know if you’re finding something isn’t working so they can change it accordingly to best benefit you!

Of course it’s also important that if you feel dismissed or that your doctor isn’t listening to you and doing what you’ve asked, you can always change doctors. I know this can be very anxiety provoking and worrying but it’s better you change to someone whose invested in your health and well-being

I completely understand, and I am really sorry to hear that you went through this. I think unfortunately that’s a common problem with mental health support. Hopefully that will change soon but please know you’re not alone ever, and I know it can feel overwhelming and upsetting when no support is available, but it’s not a reflection on your or your mental health . Sometimes it can be difficult to see that when it feels like the whole world is against you, but you are doing the best you can and that’s not a small feat when dealing with mental illnesses. The fact you are actively thinking about accessing support is so amazing and commendable!

Do whatever you feel will most benefit you, but also know we’re all here within the community to provide you support whilst you’re waiting for this! If you ever need to just let things out, don’t hesitate to reach out.

AislingDM

I couldn't agree more with @Brookee 's wonderful words She really is so right, that it could never be your fault when you're left stranded and unsupported through moments of crisis in particular. I really do love how much joy music brings to you, as it can actually so beautifully articulate our emotions even when we cannot say them out loud. You really do deserve more concrete support from others, as you certainly should not have to shoulder all this immense pain alone. Hopefully we will see some more support from your counselor this month xx

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Brookee

@LorryTruck Please don't apologise! It's completely okay to take as much time as you need before replying!

I'm so glad it's helped you, you really are an incredible individual. Always remember we're right here with you always.

Sending you love

AislingDM

1000% I get what you're saying, like sometimes you're in this state of limbo where you're waiting to see if anyone will actually reach out to you, as they should. But I truly feel that things will be better if you go yourself because then you can get the additional support ASAP!