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Depression and Self-Harming - Please read

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Firefly-86 wrote: »
    Just a question. Is there nothing you wish to live for? I mean the only reason I can continue sometimes is because there is still someone i'd like to meet and i dont know how it would be explained to my grandparents if i did do it. I hope you feel better soon.

    the only reason i keep going is because i couldnt do it to the person who found my body-to haunt them with the image of it is something i am not able to do-i have come so close so many times-so many tries that were so pathetic-like myself-i cant even kill myself properly
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    littlemissy wrote: »
    :yes:

    Whenever I felt low, I would write a list of things I wanted to do before I died. For example, I want to do a bungee jump, see my brother married etc. Things that can't be achieved overnight.

    Wow :) That's a really good idea, I never thought about doing that, I msy try that next time :)

    The things that keep me going are, for example, meeting Rich and Marie at some point and getting into teaching :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hyper person wrote: »
    the only reason i keep going is because i couldnt do it to the person who found my body-to haunt them with the image of it is something i am not able to do-i have come so close so many times-so many tries that were so pathetic-like myself-i cant even kill myself properly

    If you ever want to talk then it's absolutely fine to PM me, if you want I can PM you my MSN address too.

    I have another reason for you to keep going: Even though I don't know you in real life as it were, from what i've read from your posts, I think you are a lovely, kind, wam hearted person, and I would be disappointed and upset if you ended it all, you can get through hun xx
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    littlemissylittlemissy Posts: 9,972 Supreme Poster
    your-babe wrote: »
    Wow :) That's a really good idea, I never thought about doing that, I msy try that next time :)

    The things that keep me going are, for example, meeting Rich and Marie at some point and getting into teaching :)

    I used to put my list(s) on the wall so that I could look at it when I needed to and it was there for whenever I needed to add to it. It worked for me :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    littlemissy wrote: »
    I used to put my list(s) on the wall so that I could look at it when I needed to and it was there for whenever I needed to add to it. It worked for me :)

    Thankyou, I shall do that next time, it sounds like a fantastic idea :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hyper person wrote: »
    the only reason i keep going is because i couldnt do it to the person who found my body-to haunt them with the image of it is something i am not able to do-i have come so close so many times-so many tries that were so pathetic-like myself-i cant even kill myself properly

    There is still hope for you. Even when you are like this you are still thinking about others. You are a good person if you could but believe it. Same as Your-babe has said you can PM me or MSN or whatever I always have found it helps to talk to other people even if its just to take your mind off it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hyper Person - you may find www.nshn.co.uk & www.recoveryourlife.com useful.

    Please don't kill yourself.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    theres no point going on-im a rubbish person-theres nothing good in me-i just cant do it though-i just cant end it all-im so pathetic
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ever feel like you're falling, and can't stop yourself? It's proper bollocks. I don't know what to do with myself anymore.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    Ever feel like you're falling, and can't stop yourself? It's proper bollocks. I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

    Yep, feeling exactly the same right now. Hang on in there though, I'm hoping that it'll get to the point where it can only get better, though right now I doubt that'll be the case. Take care xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i know its difficult but you know you can do it-i believe in you-im not gonna say oh you have to stop cos that wont help but just keep trying if you can-something i said already to your-babe but thought id share with others to help-hope it at least makes you think-i know its hard-i harmed today-this evening-its just not easy
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Liv wrote: »
    Yep, feeling exactly the same right now. Hang on in there though, I'm hoping that it'll get to the point where it can only get better, though right now I doubt that'll be the case. Take care xx

    Sorry to hear that.

    Just feel so lonely. So pathetic. I really can't do this anymore.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im hear if you need to just talk
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hyper person wrote: »
    i know its difficult but you know you can do it-i believe in you-im not gonna say oh you have to stop cos that wont help but just keep trying if you can-something i said already to your-babe but thought id share with others to help-hope it at least makes you think-i know its hard-i harmed today-this evening-its just not easy

    It's not easy at all, I fucking hate this feeling. I just hate being on my own, at least that's how I feel. I NEED and HAVE to stop harming to get better for uni, yet I can't fucking do it. It shows how much of a failure I really am.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sorry to hear that, guys.

    I'm feeling alright now for some bizzare reason. And I haven't cut myself/thought about it for 8 days now.:)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hyper person wrote: »
    im hear if you need to just talk

    Thankyou, I appreciate it, if I'm honest I don't have a clue what I want, apart from a strong drink, and a break from myself.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sofie wrote: »
    Sorry to hear that, guys.

    I'm feeling alright now for some bizzare reason. And I haven't cut myself/thought about it for 8 days now.:)

    That's so good to hear Sofie, you should be so proud :) Keep it up :) xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    It's not easy at all, I fucking hate this feeling. I just hate being on my own, at least that's how I feel. I NEED and HAVE to stop harming to get better for uni, yet I can't fucking do it. It shows how much of a failure I really am.

    you are not a failure-whatever happens your not-i know you feel pressured but dont let that push you away from what your doing-your too good for that

    sofie-glad to hear that
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    Ever feel like you're falling, and can't stop yourself? It's proper bollocks. I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

    You'll be okay, you've been through a lot the last few weeks, but seeing as you've got this far you can do it. Chuck yourself head first into your studies, even if you dont want too, I did it last year and it really helped. And yes the falling feeling is proper bollocks, I've been there many times myself. xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe, you are not a failure, you shouldn't think that of yourself. We all go through hard times, it's not a crime. I know how hard it is to stop, I haven't done it in 3 weeks but the urges are just so strong now. I hope this makes you see you're not alone.
    And hyper-person, thanks for the support and everything, just don't understand the point in feeling like this or why I am, I used to be such a happy person, wish I could be her again.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    Thankyou, I appreciate it, if I'm honest I don't have a clue what I want, apart from a strong drink, and a break from myself.

    Having a strong drink can help in the short term, but dont overdo it as it will make you feel worse. I want a break from myself
    quite a bit as well, those days when you just want your head to shut the hell up and leave you alone.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    freeallangels19 wrote: »
    You'll be okay, you've been through a lot the last few weeks, but seeing as you've got this far you can do it. Chuck yourself head first into your studies, even if you dont want too, I did it last year and it really helped. And yes the falling feeling is proper bollocks, I've been there many times myself. xx

    True, I didn't think of it in that light, it's just all getting too much though. I just want to disappear somewhere. I will try to do some work tonight, seeing I have the deadline tomorrow, it's near enough done thou.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    freeallangels19 wrote: »
    Having a strong drink can help in the short term, but dont overdo it as it will make you feel worse. I want a break from myself
    quite a bit as well, those days when you just want your head to shut the hell up and leave you alone.

    That sounds so familiar. I can't stnad it that I feel like I can't get through this. May have one or two drinks, need something.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just hope you feel better-remember im here if you need to talk-know what it is to feel so low-to feel like you need something just to get you through
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hyper person wrote: »
    just hope you feel better-remember im here if you need to talk-know what it is to feel so low-to feel like you need something just to get you through

    Thankyou I appreciate it, I just feel like a burden sometimes.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    That sounds so familiar. I can't stnad it that I feel like I can't get through this. May have one or two drinks, need something.

    Try and finish your work and have a couple of drinks as a reward. Its fine to have bad days, in no way are you a burden. People care and want to see you happy. Talking it out is always good, if you bottle it up it only gets worse, trust me.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    Thankyou I appreciate it, I just feel like a burden sometimes.

    you are not a burden i promise you-i wouldnt offer if i thought that-you've been there for me and its my turn to be there for you and everyone else
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    your-babe wrote: »
    Thankyou I appreciate it, I just feel like a burden sometimes.

    There's no way that's true, you're just having a hard time and that's what we're all here for, to support each other. I really hope you start to feel better soon xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    freeallangels19 wrote: »
    Try and finish your work and have a couple of drinks as a reward. Its fine to have bad days, in no way are you a burden. People care and want to see you happy. Talking it out is always good, if you bottle it up it only gets worse, trust me.

    Thankyou to Liv and Hyper too. That's a good idea about using the drink as a reward, think I'll do that. Just made myself a cup of 'calming' tea, and having a yoghurt which I brought as a treat, just need to calm myself down and get back into things, I can't harm tonight.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if you feel the urge either talk to me or try and distract yourself-if you do harm(which im sure you wont) its a slip up they happen it doesnt make you a failure or a bad person(i know ive said that about myself but its different).
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