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Struggling.

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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I want to talk about it, but I don't even have words.

    I just need to feel something bad.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Please try not to.. we're here for you.

    What if I ask you questions? Will that help?

    Do you have anything that you can do as a distraction? Maybe a more positive way of coping?
    My new thing at the moment is lying down and putting one hand on my stomach, the other on my chest and focusing on my breath and what my stomach feels like as my breath goes in and out.
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I dunno.

    Just not in a good mind set at the minute, and generally know what I "need" to do. But it's not good. I understand that. I just can't stop myself.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know how you feel, I know it's sometimes impossible to stop yourself but please try..

    I feel like you don't really want to talk so I won't push you but I'm here okay?

    Maybe you could go and sit with your mum? Have a bru with her and a nice chat or watch some telly with her.
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I will try, it's just tough when I feel this way.

    Thank you. Here for you too, though not sure how much use I will be at the minute.

    I don't want to worry my mum, besides everyone in my family think I am "fine" it's easier that way.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks but I'm fine, I want to try and support you.

    What about that thing you did on the creative thread? Writing lyrics and stuff down. Maybe you could try that again?

    And I know you're family think you're fine but I'm not saying you should talk to your mum about how you're feeling, I mean just a general chatter about maybe your holiday or your nephew? Anything you can think of
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I feel numb, and alone, and very scared.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're not alone, you have a family that love you and you have us.

    Why are you scared?
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I know I have people around who love me and care about me, but I still feel really alone.

    I am scared cos I feel really on edge and worried I am gonna do something. I know something bad is gonna happen.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're scared, you don't want to do anything.. so try not to. I'm here, I'll reply quickly, we have 3 hours of chat tonight. You're not alone.

    Let's talk about something positive.. I want to know how your volunteering went, tell me about that.
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I can't do this anymore though. I really cant. I have let everybody down.

    Volunteering is going well. I guess I try and still keep into routine, working and volunteering. I can't not work, even though times I don't want to go into work, but I go into work anyway cos when I am there it helps.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You've let nobody down, why do you think that?

    I'm glad work helps you, you're really passionate about your job and that's great. And the kids there seem to love you :)
    I'm glad volunteering is going well, how was the talk you had to do?
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I just feel like a let down. In general.

    I have caused this all myself, nobody is to blame, just me. I hate myself so much.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're not a let down, you shouldn't think that. What have you caused yourself? These feelings? 'cause if that's what you mean then that's not true. You're not to blame for this, you don't deserve it and you have done nothing wrong. A lot of people have mental health issues, me included. And yes, I blame myself when I'm feeling low but I know it's not my fault. And that should be the case with you. hugs <3
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I don't know what I think, I can't make sense of it.

    :(
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't know what to say.. Just stick with me. Chat's on soon, let's talk about more positive stuff.

    How's your nephew? I babysat mine today.. been up since half six. he's a little bugger but I love him.
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I'm not feeling very positive.

    Sorry...
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Okay, sorry.. was worth a try
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Sorry. Didn't mean to come across blunt.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's fine, sorry if I was pushing you.
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    I know your only tryin to help, it's cool. Don't be sorry! :)
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Had a bad night night. Hardly slept and I start work at 8am. I dont want to go in cos of how rubbish I feel. :/

    Sent from my GT-I8190 using Tapatalk
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Got to work and already in a shit mood. Fml. Great day today is gonna be :(

    Sent from my GT-I8190 using Tapatalk
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Remember you say the kids always make you feel better.

    Hugs, let us know how you get on
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Yeah the children make me smile but its hard to just stay somewhere that makes you feel upset just cos you work in childcare. Meh!! :/ im okay. Be fine. Just tired

    Sent from my GT-I8190 using Tapatalk
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hugs Claire *hug*

    Don't know what to say.. but we care. I'm useless at stuff like this but I hope you're feeling a little better.
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Thank you so much. I have just had enough, I feel like a horrible person, makes sense with having somebody hate me.

    I tried to move on...
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're not a horrible person. Someone is just too selfish to see you're a caring lovely person :)
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    AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    Herro BananaMonkey :heart:

    How are you today lovely? Sounds like you had a rather difficult evening yesterday, I'm guessing you're in work right now, how is work going? To be fair Banana Monkey, you're human, you'll have people who you hate, who hate you, but then you'll have people who love you, like you, and vice versa. It's just how the human system works, try focusing on the people you have, you have an amazing career you're in, and you've taken amazing positives steps while you've been on TheSite.org.

    Often when were feeling 'Shit' reminding us feel 'Shit' really doesn't get us anywhere, have you tried alternative coping strategies, like telling yourself today is actually going to be okay, just because you feel 'shit' in the moment, don't let it effect your whole day! I used to do something pretty silly when I was feeling 'low' in the morning, look in a mirror and yell (Positive words) it would be strange, I think the strangeness made me laugh, but it's worth giving it ago!

    Hope you're feeling a bit better today :heart:

    Best wishes,
    Angel
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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Done with everything.

    :'(
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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