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@eylah i know that not everyone is the most helpful, but you can always ask them could you be transferred to someone else or else just leave the chat and rejoin? i know becca is on tonight, she is honestly so so helpful - i was in a real bad headspace but genuinely that chat with her tonight has helped me so much. i totally understand one conversation doesn’t fix everything, and i get that someone i find helpful isn’t necessarily someone you’ll find helpful and vice versa but you could always try? you really do deserve support🩷

in relation to them storing your details, they don’t do that - after they contact anyone for you they get rid of your information and if they wanted to contact someone for you / you wanted them to contact someone, then you would need to give them your information again - that is what beth told me when i asked her about that.

i really do hear your fear around others being involved and do very much so understand that eylah - i really hope you’re ok🫶🏻

@eylah i hear you🩷you really do deserve support though!! how about kelly’s heroes? they can’t contact anybody unless you provide them with your information so you’re in control.

i know that it’s so difficult whenever others get involved but it’s to make sure you’re safe, you deserve to feel safe!

i’m always here if you need someone🫶🏻

@eylah are you safe at the moment? we care about you, you’re such an important person and make the world a better place🩷always here for you🫶🏻

Alwayshope2day wrote: »

Hey @The Nightmare, conversations with conflicting opinions can be so awkward. That tension is palpable, but awkward moments are just a part of life-they don’t mean you’re doing badly.
The work coach’s questions were quite direct, and I can see why they made you uncomfortable. It sounds like she was projecting her perspective of laptops being useful for work and not understanding why it might not suit you. But if you’ve weighed up your uncle’s opinion and still don’t want it, that’s okay-it doesn’t make you wrong to decline.
I think your response about needing time to think was very reasonable. Starting a new job the next day is a big change, and wanting to process that is completely human. Maybe you could reframe it as, “I did the best I could in that moment with what I knew, but next time I’d like to…” If not accepting the job felt like a step back, you can look at it as one step back but two steps forward-now you’re better prepared for similar situations.
It’s tough to hear frustration directed at you, especially when you’re already trying. It sounds like her frustration is more about the situation than you personally. It’s easy to internalize that negativity, but it’s not a reflection of your progress. The fact that they reached out with an opportunity shows you are moving forward, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now.
Rather than dwelling on whether your decision was right, perhaps a helpful step could be to focus on preparing for similar scenarios in the future. That way, this experience can become a stepping stone rather than a roadblock.
You’ve got this-keep going! One step back, two steps forward

@Alwayshope2day That’s such a thoughtful response. You’ve acknowledged the awkwardness and tension while offering reassurance and practical advice, which is really encouraging. Your perspective on using this experience as a stepping stone rather than a setback is especially helpful, as it shifts the focus from self-criticism to growth and preparation. The suggestion to reframe the moment as “I did the best I could” is a great way to balance self-compassion with learning from the experience. It’s true that progress doesn’t always feel linear, but recognizing opportunities for growth, even in frustrating moments, is a solid mindset. The encouragement to keep going and the reminder that one opportunity doesn’t define someone’s journey makes this a well-rounded and empathetic reply.

Im here if you need to pm for someone to talk to

@eylah same for you always🩷

Hey @eylah, it's wonderful to hear the positive updates you've been sharing! Well done for helping the elderly man as well, that's a really kind and thoughtful thing to do and I'm sure he was very appreciative that you were there to help!

Hey @eylah , thank you so much for your post and for letting us into how you're feeling right now. I am sending you the biggest hug

The pressure of what you're going through sounds like it's built, and built, and built, and you miss your mum terribly - I hear you. I'd like to reassure you that you never, ever have to apologise for mentioning her here. She was the most important person in your life, and you want to share about her with us - that's an honour, @eylah , and I'm very grateful you do. Your connection genuinely sounds beautiful. And living with the absence of her daily just sounds like the greatest ache. You never have to quiet that grief for us here. It can be loud, and wild-feeling, and we want to listen and to know how things truly feel for you.

Thank you for letting us know you're physically safe. I'm reassured to hear this, though, I hear that the suicidal thoughts are still very loud, and in your message I could almost hear anger or frustration towards them when you said, 'give me a break'. That is so, so valid, @eylah , and feels like a powerful part of you speaking there, saying, let me breathe. Would that be fair to say? I've coped with long-term suicidal thoughts myself at times in the past, and honestly, it was excrutiating. I really want to echo what @TheNightmare has said about just how much energy it takes to get through each day when you've got thoughts of suicide racing round your mind. Living in that life-or-death state of mind constantly sounds beyond draining, and so much strain for your body to be dealing with. So the fact that you're hear opening up, and surviving each day is a huge testament to the effort you're putting in. Everything you're doing is more than enough. You're here, you're surviving. That's huge.

You mentioned that last time you went to hospital the staff there talked to you about a possible section, and this sounds really hard, because I can hear it's left you wary of seeking help from hospital again. That's such a tricky position to be in, esspecially when you're wanting support. Can I ask what those conversations about sectioning looked like at the time, and whether any alternative support options were discussed? May I also ask whether you're still in touch with these staff / that support team at this time?

I also wanted to get back to the part of your message where you talked about struggling with confidence, and in particular, feeling awful about the advice or answers you're giving others. That just sounds so painful, @eylah , because I know how much you care about helping, and how much time and effort you put towards that. These boards make that so, so clear! I suppose I wanted to say that I can honestly relate to what you were saying here - esspecially amongst my friends sometimes when I'm struggling myself, I can become so inhibited and unsure of what to say. It's like my mind goes blank, and then I can feel a bit embarassed for not being more 'helpful'! But I think in those moments its often a sign that I'm really needing some care myself, you know? That I'm needing to be the 'talker' that day rather than the 'listener', or that I can't necessarily hold space for someone else until I've tended to me. And that's totally okay. Your messages of support are always so beautiful to see, and at the same time, if sometimes you don't have capacity, that's so real and human. How does that sound?

I know there other parts of your message I haven't necessarily responded to here, but I just wanted to share those pieces first. Keep us updated if you wish, @eylah . We're here. We're listening. We care