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Best Of
Re: (TW: suicidal thoughts, self harm, body image) life doesn’t feel worth living
Hey @bignosegirly0, thank you for sharing your experience here with us, it's brave to be open about these feelings, and I'm glad you felt you could share this in this thread. We see and hear you 
I can understand that you're not feeling in a good place right now. It's okay to express your emotions here! I can hear how you're struggling to find a reason to keep going in life, and that you feel frustrated around physical appearance and how people are treated differently based on it. I don't think you're alone in feeling this way - you'd hope that people would treat you fairly, and I don't think it's unreasonable to expect that standard. You do have value and you do deserve respect!
Being mocked about your love life and being treated unfairly due to appearance are awful to go through, and I'm sorry that you've had to go through that. I hear how having body dysmorphia is difficult anyways, but having these experiences as well exacerbate those feelings so much more. To hear how this impacts the hope you hold in the future is upsetting, and makes it clear how much this is weighing on you.
It's clear that you've tried a lot to do something about this - changing your appearance, weight, dress sense - but that it's not giving you the results that you want. It's something that's affecting you a lot, and you're driven to try and do something about it. I wonder, have you spoken to a therapist or counsellor about how you feel? Being able to talk to someone about body dysmorphia and how you feel about yourself and the experiences you've had can be really helpful to lift a weight off your shoulders and perhaps feel a little less alone. Is that something you could consider trying?
I know that you've had experiences related to your physical appearance that have hurt, but from what you've said, it's clear that you're someone who's really trying their best to help themselves and that you expect fair treatment like others. You as a person still have worth and something to contribute, and I hope that you can still hold onto that. We're happy to have you here as part of our community!
I've included some links below to some support services that might be helpful, in case you'd like to speak to someone about how you're feeling:
I can understand that you're not feeling in a good place right now. It's okay to express your emotions here! I can hear how you're struggling to find a reason to keep going in life, and that you feel frustrated around physical appearance and how people are treated differently based on it. I don't think you're alone in feeling this way - you'd hope that people would treat you fairly, and I don't think it's unreasonable to expect that standard. You do have value and you do deserve respect!
Being mocked about your love life and being treated unfairly due to appearance are awful to go through, and I'm sorry that you've had to go through that. I hear how having body dysmorphia is difficult anyways, but having these experiences as well exacerbate those feelings so much more. To hear how this impacts the hope you hold in the future is upsetting, and makes it clear how much this is weighing on you.
It's clear that you've tried a lot to do something about this - changing your appearance, weight, dress sense - but that it's not giving you the results that you want. It's something that's affecting you a lot, and you're driven to try and do something about it. I wonder, have you spoken to a therapist or counsellor about how you feel? Being able to talk to someone about body dysmorphia and how you feel about yourself and the experiences you've had can be really helpful to lift a weight off your shoulders and perhaps feel a little less alone. Is that something you could consider trying?
I know that you've had experiences related to your physical appearance that have hurt, but from what you've said, it's clear that you're someone who's really trying their best to help themselves and that you expect fair treatment like others. You as a person still have worth and something to contribute, and I hope that you can still hold onto that. We're happy to have you here as part of our community!
I've included some links below to some support services that might be helpful, in case you'd like to speak to someone about how you're feeling:
Crisis Messenger (24/7) | text THEMIX to 85258
Samaritans (24/7) | call 116 123 | email jo@samaritans.org
Papyrus (2pm-midnight) | call 0800 068 41 41 | text 07786 209 697 | email pat@payrus-uk.org
Supportline (hours vary) | call 01708 765 200
Childline | call 0800 11 11
Azziman
1
Re: [deleted]
Hey @bignosegirly0, I can understand how acting out in anger is concerning you. It's encouraging to know that you've recognised that there's an issue, and that you've tried mindfulness techniques to distract your mind. It's kind to think about the impact of your behaviour on others 
Have you noticed any patterns that trigger these responses? Particular places, people, topics etc?
I don't have much guidance to offer myself, but just wanted to let you know that you're seen and heard here. I hope that someone is able to share their experience or tips that worked for them with you. We're here to support you
Have you noticed any patterns that trigger these responses? Particular places, people, topics etc?
I don't have much guidance to offer myself, but just wanted to let you know that you're seen and heard here. I hope that someone is able to share their experience or tips that worked for them with you. We're here to support you
Azziman
1
Chat with the community about grief (Thursday 8:00pm - 9:30pm)
This week's Themed Support Chat (Thursday 8-9:30pm) will be about grief.
Come to chat with community members about bereavement, maybe people you've lost (recent or in the past), and how to navigate life when you're having those feelings of grief and loss.
Join us via the support groups page from 8pm on Thursday.
The moderators of this session won't be grief experts, but they'll be there to chat too.
Come to chat with community members about bereavement, maybe people you've lost (recent or in the past), and how to navigate life when you're having those feelings of grief and loss.
Join us via the support groups page from 8pm on Thursday.
The moderators of this session won't be grief experts, but they'll be there to chat too.
JustV
1
Re: What should our topic be for Thursday's topic-specific chat?
@Rose113 @eylah thank you both!
These are great suggestions, so there's no reason we can't book them both in.
Purely because it was the first suggestion and they have equal 'votes' right now, we'll make grief tomorrow's topic and we'll book triggers and how to manage them for next time.
I know we're confirming these topics with slightly late notice as well (sorry folks some staff shortages) so we can also revisit them in the future with a bit more run-up.
These are great suggestions, so there's no reason we can't book them both in.
Purely because it was the first suggestion and they have equal 'votes' right now, we'll make grief tomorrow's topic and we'll book triggers and how to manage them for next time.
I know we're confirming these topics with slightly late notice as well (sorry folks some staff shortages) so we can also revisit them in the future with a bit more run-up.
JustV
1
Re: 19M looking for friends
@JMMV2005 yess you definitely should one day, it was so pretty especially specially at this time of year!! I also love travelling, sometimes I forget how pretty the UK actually is and then I get shocked because there’s so much to see.
I definitely get that with Halloween. I like to say people are never too old to do something for it because it makes me sad when I think one day I’ll be too old to celebrate it😭😭
Even if you can’t trick or treat, personally I think it’s fun to do stuff like bake Halloween themed recipes or watch scary movies (or not even scary, just autumn vibe ones)
I LOVE making cinnamon rolls they are my fav and my fav autumn movies are probs Coraline and Fantastic Mr Fox (even if they’re both kinda aimed at children I think they’re so cute)
I definitely get that with Halloween. I like to say people are never too old to do something for it because it makes me sad when I think one day I’ll be too old to celebrate it😭😭
Even if you can’t trick or treat, personally I think it’s fun to do stuff like bake Halloween themed recipes or watch scary movies (or not even scary, just autumn vibe ones)
I LOVE making cinnamon rolls they are my fav and my fav autumn movies are probs Coraline and Fantastic Mr Fox (even if they’re both kinda aimed at children I think they’re so cute)
Re: Placement update
Hey @TheNightmare, thank you so much for sharing your update - I'm really glad that you've managed to get a placement and that you're getting worthwhile experience!
You're definitely right in saying that there are others in a similar situation to yours - it's very difficult to get a job, so there are people of different ages seeking experience to get a job as well. Have you interacted with these individuals also seeking work experience? It's good to be surrounded with a support network where you can help each other, and can really help make you feel less alone
I hear you when you say that you feel shy in social situations and that you find it difficult to join in at times. Adjusting to placement is a gradual process, and you're already doing a great job sharing ideas and working with others! It's completely normal to feel shy since you're not used to it yet. I was the same when I started my placement - I'm here to tell you that it gets better over time and you'll feel more comfortable with the people you're working with as well. And you're right in saying that there are more opportunities for you to engage and make the most of the experience until Friday.
Really happy to hear that things are going great for you, keep us updated
Kai
You're definitely right in saying that there are others in a similar situation to yours - it's very difficult to get a job, so there are people of different ages seeking experience to get a job as well. Have you interacted with these individuals also seeking work experience? It's good to be surrounded with a support network where you can help each other, and can really help make you feel less alone
I hear you when you say that you feel shy in social situations and that you find it difficult to join in at times. Adjusting to placement is a gradual process, and you're already doing a great job sharing ideas and working with others! It's completely normal to feel shy since you're not used to it yet. I was the same when I started my placement - I'm here to tell you that it gets better over time and you'll feel more comfortable with the people you're working with as well. And you're right in saying that there are more opportunities for you to engage and make the most of the experience until Friday.
Really happy to hear that things are going great for you, keep us updated
Kai
kaii
2
Re: 19M looking for friends
@JMMV2005 I love when my fav movies are long!! I’ll definitely give them a try at some point. Sorry it took me a while to reply, I went to Edinburgh for a couple days (it was so pretty).
I don’t know about you but I’m currently on half term and I’m so happy because I honestly needed a break from school 😭😭
Are you doing anything fun for Halloween (if you celebrate it)? I’m so excited, it’s one of my favourite times of the year
I don’t know about you but I’m currently on half term and I’m so happy because I honestly needed a break from school 😭😭
Are you doing anything fun for Halloween (if you celebrate it)? I’m so excited, it’s one of my favourite times of the year
Re: 19M looking for friends
@stardust444 The Lord Of The Rings are quite long films, especially if you watch the extended editions like I did, but there very good so I believe the more run time the better, just make sure you have a whole afternoon or evening free if you watch one lol
JMMV2005
1
Re: Worrying
From reading your post quite a few times today I actually saw myself in you as this is something I am also struggling with right now too. I know how hard employment is at the moment for young people and it sounds like you are trying your hardest to get into employment. It can be also a challenge to get the motivation to keep trying as well despite having rejections and not finding the right company to work at. I understand how this must be making you feel right now and I hope everything gets sorted out eventually for you 
. As @JustV mentioned it may be a good idea to ask for feedback on your CV from peers because then you can collate feedback from different people to see how your CV is looking at the moment. I also know sometimes and this is what I tend to do when I apply for jobs (and say I dont get offered the role) I tend to email the company or recruitment office to ask if they can provide feedback so I can improve on my applications in the near future. I know not all companies may be able to have the resources to provide feedback but its worth a shot at doing though. Also, I am always here too if you ever want some help or advice on getting into employment or even a fresh pair of eyes to read over your cv's or cover letter's, im more than happy to lend a hand and help you on your journey.
I also hear that it has been impacting your moods and having an effect on your day to day life and its totally normally to be overthinking about getting or finding work at the moment. It definitely has a major impact on us too because we can often feel bad about not being in work and it can cause a lot of emotional inflictions upon us. It also sounds like your work coach has also been helping you recently which is good to here (work coaches are good at giving feedback on cv's and stuff as well). I also wish you the best for you work placement too as I hope it goes well and fingers crossed it may lead to a permanent position at that company as well. If not it's still good experience and is good to put on your cv at the end of the day as experience is normally what most employers look for in candidates applications.
I hope you are doing okay right now
Sending digital hugs,
Amy22
. As @JustV mentioned it may be a good idea to ask for feedback on your CV from peers because then you can collate feedback from different people to see how your CV is looking at the moment. I also know sometimes and this is what I tend to do when I apply for jobs (and say I dont get offered the role) I tend to email the company or recruitment office to ask if they can provide feedback so I can improve on my applications in the near future. I know not all companies may be able to have the resources to provide feedback but its worth a shot at doing though. Also, I am always here too if you ever want some help or advice on getting into employment or even a fresh pair of eyes to read over your cv's or cover letter's, im more than happy to lend a hand and help you on your journey.I also hear that it has been impacting your moods and having an effect on your day to day life and its totally normally to be overthinking about getting or finding work at the moment. It definitely has a major impact on us too because we can often feel bad about not being in work and it can cause a lot of emotional inflictions upon us. It also sounds like your work coach has also been helping you recently which is good to here (work coaches are good at giving feedback on cv's and stuff as well). I also wish you the best for you work placement too as I hope it goes well and fingers crossed it may lead to a permanent position at that company as well
. If not it's still good experience and is good to put on your cv at the end of the day as experience is normally what most employers look for in candidates applications.I hope you are doing okay right now
Sending digital hugs,
Amy22
Amy22
1
Re: Worrying
I can understand your anxieties Nightmare, especially when I imagine it feels like there's so much pressure on this part of your life - on getting a job like you've wanted for so long.
I wonder: have you ever sat down with someone to look at your CV, to properly think about what jobs you want to apply for and how to write the applications, and to get a second opinion on everything? I wonder if some external validation would help.
You could even do that here if you wanted - we have plenty of folks here who either have jobs or who are looking for work too, and they might be able to workshop your CV or an application with you if you felt comfortable posting about it (obvs with any sensitive info removed!)
I wonder: have you ever sat down with someone to look at your CV, to properly think about what jobs you want to apply for and how to write the applications, and to get a second opinion on everything? I wonder if some external validation would help.
You could even do that here if you wanted - we have plenty of folks here who either have jobs or who are looking for work too, and they might be able to workshop your CV or an application with you if you felt comfortable posting about it (obvs with any sensitive info removed!)
Hmmm do you have a sense of whether the low mood is because you can't find a job, or if you're struggling to get work because of your low mood / mental health?On top of that, I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to shake this low mood.
JustV
2