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DonnerKebab wrote: »

toffuna101 wrote: »

DonnerKebab wrote: »

@toffuna101 hey, just checking up to see how you are. I know it's been a scary time and you've struggled a lot lately, and i just wanted to you to know i'm here to talk if you want.

im still not alright but im not at crisis point like i was last friday. thanks for checking up on me, i appreciate it @DonnerKebab

@toffuna101 sorry i've not been that active these last few days, but i'm so happy to hear that your doing better at least than you were. I know it's not a lot, but the fact that your in a slightly better place, even if it's still not a good place, than you were several days ago is a small victory. You improve each time your better than you were the day before. Can i ask how A&E went?

basically since im 16 i had to go to the adult A&E and it was pretty shit. the children's A&E was way better. the nurses didnt care if an elderly man was struggling on a wheelchair. he fell on the floor so paramedics had to move him. at least camhs were somewhat helpful by giving me ARC Rapid Response. im still under 18 so they had to come to me. but ARC Rapid Response is just like any other service. when i stated that i was suicidal to them they said "have you tried distraction techniques like colouring?" and im like hmmm why didnt i try that before? i mean i dont really blame them, what else can they do? camhs shouldve sent a referral in for me to go to a psychiatric hospital as an informal (voluntary) patient. their reasoning for not doing so was because being sent to a psychiatric hospital is a last resort. @DonnerKebab

Eating sushi hehehe

Can mention anything, even if you're listening to music or eating a burger : )

Be honest, am I a horrible human 🙃

River wrote: »

I give up, what’s the point of shit anymore

@River i know it doesn't seem like it, but it's the hope things get better. You might not feel that you have that hope, but there is always a chance things improve. Worst case scenario for me is upping, and leaving the country, leaving my life here and going to either Australia or the US to start again. What's the worst that could happen? There's always the chance of starting over and beginning anew, or of things in your life currently to improve. It seems impossible after so long, but let me put this is context for you, i turned 23 and didn't have a single friend, and hardly any social interaction in my life prior to the mix. Never had one person care about my wellbeing. Yet here i have friends, and even the mix messaged me and spoke about my wellbeing. Even after a long time, when things seem hopeless, there is always a chance, no matter how remote, things get better.

I wish i could say something more that would instantly make things better or make you feel better, but i can't. All i can say is things can change after years of hell. It's a question of time, and how long it takes. This will sound silly, but my mentality changed a lot growing up, felt very similar to that, and all i could do was go emotionally numb from the pain of it, and start to find small moments of joy as my lifeline. Wingfest once a year for a few hours was mostly it. I think of it as holding on. It can be your hobby of ariel hoop, or art, or anything that gives you enjoyment, and cling onto that until things change.

I know it's mostly useless advice, but it's all i can say. Sending a hug your way friend.

DonnerKebab wrote: »

@toffuna101 hey, just checking up to see how you are. I know it's been a scary time and you've struggled a lot lately, and i just wanted to you to know i'm here to talk if you want.

im still not alright but im not at crisis point like i was last friday. thanks for checking up on me, i appreciate it @DonnerKebab

I give up, what’s the point of shit anymore

DonnerKebab wrote: »

@eylah just sending you a message of love and support for that pre-op thing you said you had today. I know it's scary, but we're here for you as little of a consolation as that is my favourite twat

aw you remembered thankyou its at 2:15! i hope you’re well! I’m leaving in 10 mins so won’t be active til after my appt hugs 🫂 my favourite twat !