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Re: I’m a free woman - but I don’t feel relieved (TW police/suicide)
I think that’s a positive thing to hear though, even if you don’t feel positively about it. That’s totally valid and okay, just trying to say I’m glad it doesn’t seem like it’ll get any worse or anything. From what I know of it, it makes sense that you’d be frustrated and confused about why it all happened. I think it’s totally natural to feel the way you do. I suppose if nothing more is happening about it then you can begin to move on? I know it’s one of those things that stays with you, but I really hope it will be easier for you soon. I’m not sure what you’re supposed to do to process things - maybe you could try keeping a journal or something? I dont know why it’s so hard to access any proper help. I hope you’ll start to feel free and relieved soon, but it’s okay if that takes time, and okay if you don’t feel that at all. You’ve been so strong to get through all that. Sorry for this rubbish reply, I really wish there was something I could say to actually help you. Sending hugs
Re: Im so fed up. tw
NateORlucah wrote: »Im so fed up. of everything. my carers dont even listen anymore, I feel like they never did anyway. every time I try to speak my mind they turn it into some arguement then blame me for it. im fed up.
I told them I felt like they were getting rid of me after they turned around and said they could get me a new placement, they said in an arguement later on that it was my choice but at the time it felt like they just wanted me gone. it still does. I dont even know what I feel anymore.
Im just so done. Im 16 and it feels like no one wants to look after me because im too much to handle. even my adoptive home fell apart. I feel like I have no family apart from my friends. I just want to curl up and disappear. Im too much to handle because I cant control my enotions and anger. its not my fault though, is it? maybe it is.
So now im moving to another place that will probably break down eventually too because no one understands me enough.
I just want to disapear but I cant because my friends said that they would go too. I feel trapped in this never ending cycle.
Plus my carers are accusing me of telling people that they are leaving me (I didnt tell anyone) so people are lying , and my carer just shut the door on me and didnt even let me speak.
(edited because I forgot a key point)
Im so fed up. tw
Im so fed up. of everything. my carers dont even listen anymore, I feel like they never did anyway. every time I try to speak my mind they turn it into some arguement then blame me for it. im fed up.
I told them I felt like they were getting rid of me after they turned around and said they could get me a new placement, they said in an arguement later on that it was my choice but at the time it felt like they just wanted me gone. it still does. I dont even know what I feel anymore.
Im just so done. Im 16 and it feels like no one wants to look after me because im too much to handle. even my adoptive home fell apart. I feel like I have no family apart from my friends. I just want to curl up and disappear. Im too much to handle because I cant control my enotions and anger. its not my fault though, is it? maybe it is.
So now im moving to another place that will probably break down eventually too because no one understands me enough.
I just want to disapear but I cant because my friends said that they would go too. I feel trapped in this never ending cycle.
I told them I felt like they were getting rid of me after they turned around and said they could get me a new placement, they said in an arguement later on that it was my choice but at the time it felt like they just wanted me gone. it still does. I dont even know what I feel anymore.
Im just so done. Im 16 and it feels like no one wants to look after me because im too much to handle. even my adoptive home fell apart. I feel like I have no family apart from my friends. I just want to curl up and disappear. Im too much to handle because I cant control my enotions and anger. its not my fault though, is it? maybe it is.
So now im moving to another place that will probably break down eventually too because no one understands me enough.
I just want to disapear but I cant because my friends said that they would go too. I feel trapped in this never ending cycle.
Re: Struggling
My friends mum(the one I'm staying at) also upset me a little. I've got this thing about suncream where I just can't wear it because I can't deal with the texture so yesterday I was out all day without suncream even tho it was really sunny and when we got back my friends mum was a bit like "did you have suncream on" and I said no and she was just a bit like "oh well enjoy skin cancer when you're older" and it took me back a bit and I was just like "I can't deal with the texture" and she was like "well you're just gonna have to enjoy chemotherapy when you're older then". Which upset me because I lost my aunt to cancer. It wasn't skin cancer but it was still cancer and her saying it like that hurt a bit.
I get not wearing suncream isn't the best but I barely burn and mainly tan anyways. Also If I did burn massively I'd face the suncream but it's just upset me a bit because it's a bit harsh. Idk if I'm overreacting tho
I get not wearing suncream isn't the best but I barely burn and mainly tan anyways. Also If I did burn massively I'd face the suncream but it's just upset me a bit because it's a bit harsh. Idk if I'm overreacting tho
Chloe234
4
Re: [TODAY AT 2PM!] 28th July Movie Afternoon!
@Gemma Oh ya I have Netflix. It's on there so I can watch thank yaa
Re: Struggling
Thus somewhat got worse because of something yesterday it was pride day and I was there with my friend group and the day was amazing. It was ruined a little tho because of this guy who was hanging around and was asking my friends mum what our ages were and then just kept bothering others. He kept hanging around us and I just felt so uncomfy. When our friend and mum left though he approached us and tried chatting to us (in a creepy way) but it was awful. I got so scared and altho I haven't really spoken about it it's just made me paranoid that even just going beach today people could be about.I just cant get rid of the feeling of hopelessness. Im just stuck in
I also hate how i cant do something like go for a walk alone without being really scared that im being follllowed or someones going to take advantage of me or even in fear im going to bump into someone whos hurt me in my past even though its unlikely. Or even just something tiny like staying home alone im so paranoid. Every little sound i get scared and its so awful to put up with.
I just hate having this mindset. I feel so stupid
Chloe234
3
Re: [TODAY AT 2PM!] 28th July Movie Afternoon!
oh thanks i forgot. Ive never seen Mama Mia lol.
I just checked and can't get subtitles to work but I'll try later and hopefully they work then so I can join
I just checked and can't get subtitles to work but I'll try later and hopefully they work then so I can join