Best Of

Im doing so bad I can barely eat or drink (I think I’m actually losing weight now :<) everything triggers me now, seeing people happy laughing or in groups whether in person or on TV or doing anything I enjoyed now triggers me and sends me into distress and worry and my thoughts are so much worse now because I feel like I will never be the same. This has become a strong habit idk how to break it. Everything reminds me of how numb I feel and my physical issues since the antidepressant I just feel like it’s all permanent and I’ve ruined my life. I feel like I’ve forever lost myself and none of my coping skills can break this cycle of distress. I’m locked into it and can’t see a way out and can’t see life changing. If this one physical issue begins to improve I will probably calm down so much but it’s been almost 7 weeks and I’m still so worried about it not improving. i hate how distressed I can get it makes me want to scream I feel so scared and afraid. I have to see the guy the ambulance reported on Monday I’m so afraid. I feel for my safety I should cancel it, the ambulance crew had the speaker on and the things he said about me and to the ambulance crew is contributing to distress. Idk if I feel safe seeing him with my current headspace if that’s how he might treat me.it’s so hard if I get out of bed I have to face constant distress worry and thoughts and triggers which I can’t escape I’m struggling so much. I’ve paid for a private psychiatrist now I cba to wait I need guidance. I’m having so many intrusive thoughts telling me not to eat when I try and eat idk why I’m getting so many intrusive thoughts.

I’m trying to stay safe. Thank you for checking in, take care sorry this is so long 😓

Hey @Nemuritai , thank you so much for sharing about this. I hear you, and we see you. What would you say has been the toughest part of the last few weeks, if you feel comfortable sharing? No pressure at all to do so if that doesn't feel helpful right now either. We're here to listen whenever you'd like to share.

Slowing down sounds like a really self-caring thing to offer yourself, especially if you're noticing that things have been difficult. What's one of your favourite ways to slow down when things start to feel a bit much. I know for me watching a movie is one of the best ways to help my brain feel quieter, or allowing myself to say 'no' to social plans when I'm a bit overloaded.

We're here for you, and sending care.