Best Of

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Nooo please don’t remove it

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i just feel so put off even joining, i just feel like scared now of doing/saying something wrong? everytime i’ve joined support chat i have always responded to multiple messages for everyone who’s also been in the chat but found that ive rarely gotten a response other than from mods usually, and i don’t want to specifically chat to a mod only for the time, if i wanted 1-1 support i would find that elsewhere rather than in a group but there’s been many chats ive joined where ive solely been responded to by mods.

on monday night i was a little frustrated by the fact everyone had seemed to ignore me for best part of 30 mins, i had sent a few messages about not getting responses and feeling ignored for that time, it wasn’t at all directed at the mods only, if it was i would have mentioned them by name in the message to ensure they knew it was directed at them if that was the case but it was NOT directed towards them, hence why there was no specific person / people mentioned as it was to the whole group. after that i think just 1 other person replied to me except for the mods. when mods have replied to me n i reply back, i only do because they’ve asked questions / so as im not just being rude and ignoring messages to me, not because i am looking for a 1-1 conversation.

i had joined one of the groups once, i cant even remember which one it was but there was 1 mod and a handful of others, everyone was talking as a group and responding to everyone’s message, it wasn’t 1-1 conversation with a mod within a group setting, but it was so nice to be able to talk to people who have understanding of struggling with mental health and the input from the mod too but have never felt the same about any other times ive joined? it was so helpful to hear from other people in similar situations who do understand it and maybe are facing barriers with support and that i’m not alone, as you don’t really find that is something that is talked about often i guess? like compared to helplines where they don’t actually understand what it’s like to struggle with mental health (obviously there are people who are motivated to volunteer with helplines as a result of being through it themselves) but many times i’ve been greeted by someone who has no understanding at all, for example being told by a helpline when discussing disordered eating that i should just eat because it’s not that hard, whereas with the support groups, everyone there has experienced something in relation to struggling with mental health, maybe not the same situation but they can understand better. i do apologise if this is badly explained lol, ive spent the past 2 days doing my induction at college and filling in forms etc so my head is fried😂

i do agree with the fact that the support group isn’t a place for 1-1 support with a mod, but i can also see why sometimes appear that people are having a 1-1 conversation with mods, and that is purely because there are times you can just have all your messages ignored and the only ones to reply are the mods. i think it would be helpful if there was something on here about peer support, for people who maybe struggle with that type of thing. i know i would have struggled a lot with it when i was younger, but now that a bit older and actually had the opportunity to complete a qualification in peer mentoring and volunteer with children too, my confidence has developed a lot when it comes to supporting other people.

i think all the mods are amazing, and im sure i speak for everyone when i say we are so grateful for them all for giving up time out of their day to be mods!!!

for anyone who is reading this and is looking more for 1-1 support, i cannot recommend kelly’s heroes enough, they are honestly AMAZING! everyone i have spoken to there has been so so lovely and understanding - they also have lived experience volunteers too which is always helpful to know. i haven’t been using them for that long now, but i talk to the same group of people usually, so kinda feels a bit like on here where you’ve had the mods in chat before so you like ‘know’ them type of thing? i know one thing i struggle with when it comes to helplines is confidentiality and the risk of other services being involved, kelly’s heroes cannot involve anyone without your consent, and you also need to provide them with your name and address etc, so they cannot do anything unless you let them basically which makes it easier to talk i think as you don’t have that worry of what if they tell someone!! i’ve also found that calm zone are so helpful too, and from what i gather with things ive shared with them they can only encourage you to seek help if you’re at crisis point etc, but they can’t actually involve anyone (im not 100% sure but ive told them some things and they said all they can do is encourage me to go to a&e etc) plus they have the option to use a return user code so you aren’t repeating yourself all the time!

I think that’s the thing. Mods having personality and speaking to members, rather than just being a scary presence, is one of the things that makes chat the way it is. In so many chats I’ve been in mods are terrifying, but that’s never been the case here because mods are part of the conversation. I’ve seen people only talking to mods and that’s not great, but at the same time, making mods robotic and a bit scary might discourage people. I’ve always supported in chat, I’ve always chipped in where I can and I would always speak to another user as well as a mod if they were talking to me though, and I think most do these days. After all it is a peer support group and that should always be encouraged, but keep the personalities, as so many mods are brilliant at what they do

hey @Rose113
i think the colours are supposed to represent the difficulty in upcoming fixtures for the team / player

so green means easy (team/player will prob perform well)
red means hard (prob wont do well)
dark red very hard (will probs play brutal)
grey means like meh .. they'll prob do alright


you can use the info if you want to decide who to start or bench

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