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"Demonising Fat People" - Appalled by peoples attitudes.
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OK it's very much a minority, but some of the people who've replyed to both this thread, and the original one, the ones claiming to hate the narrow mindedness of people, need to rethink some of the things they're saying.
More on topic, I'm not going to use myself as an example here because my weights been ridiculously changeable over the last 7 or so years and I perosnally don't think I'll ever be comfortable. But having watched friends, especially when being at school, having to force them to come in for lessons, because of the ridiculous taunts and bullying they'd get, refusing to go and eat lunch in the dining area with everyone else to avoid the name calling... yeah. I'd say it takes confidence and courage to be anything less than perfect in this world.
And yeah I know whats going to be said "Being at school's different, its kids"
But unfortunetly, some people just don't grow up. I left school about 2 and a half years ago now. And I still get abuse - from people I barely see - about things from then. Hell my cousins 26 and a recovering anorexic and SHE still gets ridiculed about her weight from people who knew her in the past.
It's stupid attitudes like that that cause so many self confidence issues in people of any age.
Are you kidding me on? My dad has a beer belly and my mum had breast cancer a few years back. You must be on the glue if you think those troubles are on par with each other. If you're fat, there's (usually) stuff you can do about it. How hard it is depends on the reason you're fat in the first place (whether it's you eating a load of crap or bad genes, whatever). If you have cancer on the other hand, whether you live or die is entirely out of your hands.
tl;dr - I'd rather be overweight than have cancer.
I don't think that when I see fat people eating a regular sized meal. I do think it when I see people walk into McDonalds, order 3 or 4 burgers for themselves, chips, a milkshake and maybe a desert. It's like, holy fuck, you're not even trying. Infact it enrages me when I see parents do this with their fat kids.
I'm still saying it doesn't. It's not like you're really *doing* anything. You need to work or go to the shops, so you go out in public and put up with the looks because you have no other choice - this isn't courageous. If you walked around in summer in skimpy clothing, then that would take courage... and even then, only if you were bothered by what other people thought. I seen plenty of fat women walk around in denim skirts and bikini tops in summer. Not exactly attractive, but they're obviously not (that) bothered by what people think or they wouldn't do it. Sure, the constant comments get tiring and you'd rather people didn't, but that's about it. They know what to do if it bothers them *that* much.
Well exactly, you shouldn't be ashamed. You should only be ashamed (for want of a better word, but I'm trying to keep the theme going ) if you arrive at a conclusion by yourself, not if you're influenced by outside opinion. ie, if you can't stand to look in the mirror, then you should feel ashamed and do something about it. If you like looking in the mirror and do the ocassional spot of singing into a hairbrush infront of it, then fuck what other people think and say.
It's the way the world is really... If people weren't making jokes because of your size, it would be your ginger hair. Or your blonde hair, as eeeveryone knows blondie's are stupid. Or it could be the way you dress, since if you don't dress generic/normal you're a satan worshipping freak. If you're a guy and you wear eyeliner, you're gay. If you're emo or listen to emo music, you're a little whiney bitch. If you listen to death metal, you sacrifice animals. If you have spots, you don't wash. If you happen to believe in Allah since 9/11, you're probably plotting a suicide bomb attack as I type this. If you're a guy with semi long hair, your job options are limited. Same goes for if you dye your hair bright colours, or if you have visible piercings or tats. Same goes if... well, you get the idea.
I can see what you're saying but I disagree with the last bit. Although "Nobody's perfect" sounds like a recycled cliché, it's true. Noone I know really gives a shit about trying to be perfect either except 18 year old girls who are too influenced by what Heat magazine says.
Like I said in the other thread, I get some amount of shit on a daily basis for the way I dress. A group of about 10 - 15 neds tried to start a fight with me on the two minute walk to a local shop on Thursday because I'm a "goff". Even though I'm actually not in the slightest, they just don't have a clue what a they're talking about... Although I guess their ignorance on this matter kind of backs up the point about them not being worth listening to in the first place. Certainly wasn't the first time people have tried to physically fight with me just because I happen to pass them and they don't like how I dress, and it certainly won't be the last. On an average night out (on the journey to the club/bar alone) I get maybe what, five groups of people laughing or making comments? I probably actually get more shit than fat people do, and I've certainly never heard of people starting fights with fat people simply because they're fat (although I did have a fat guy in a club say to me when I was wearing eyeliner "You realise you look gay with all that makeup?", to which I replied "You realise you look like a fat fuck with all that fat, fatty?"... he tried to fight with me outside later on.
Aaanyway I'm slightly deviating from the point. Basically, it doesn't take courage to dress how I dress even though I probably receive more shit than you do. It doesn't take courage because it's my choice to dress this way, the same as it's a fat persons choice to be fat (or more accurately, their choice not do anything about it).
Before anyone starts bitching, I didn't say it's fat peoples' own fault they're that way (regardless of genes/whatever), so don't go down that road.
PMSL!! Good retort.
On the other note about cancer, I think you mis-read her statement as it wasn't worded very well - I think she's saying cancer is NOT on par with being overweight, the same train of thought as yourself
And I'm with you, being fat is not brave at all lol. I can't believe someone could even think that.
So are slim people cowards ?? lol
I could use the same twisted argument to say being into diet/exercise is brave, I am constantly ridiculed for eating 6x a day in the office, the weird foods I eat, the fact I refuse cakes/donuts/chocolates on a daily (yes daily) basis when others stuff their faces in front of me.
Man, you know what, I am brave:D :rolleyes:
Mmmmmm.....Donuts
That doesn't mean because you don't think it takes them courage to do certain things that it doesn't.
Kiezo, you've basically turned around and made it clear exactly what can happen, by admitting to doing it yourself:
At the end of the day, yes people do things like that because if a lack of self esteem. But the comment still hurts, it's still uncalled for, more than often a pathetic attempt. But to get it constantly, and still go out and put up with it, takes bravery.
No, it's not like facing cancer, etc etc, but it still takes bravery.
The act of being fat is not brave or anything of the sort lol.
It's mostly my own perceptions I guess but I'm sure people DO think like that when they see people eating.
Courage is having the X characteristic and doing things however you like, ignoring people who pick on you for it, doing what you want without caring what others think.
I USED to not care what people thought about me, and now I do and I feel judged about my appearance every time I go outside. People may or may not be judging me, I don't know, but that's how it feels.
By the way, nice to see you back!
Is it ok to be eccessively overweight i.e fat? Again no it not, and we should be saying otherwise just to protect peoples feelings.
But it's not alright to demonise fat people either. Nasty insults arn't usually a good way of encouraging people to do something about their problem. If your fat and you worry about what people think, and you worry about your health do something about it, don't argue that it takes courage to be fat and that it's ok to be fat because it doesn't and it's not.
If you have low self-confidence, then you have something in common with many other fat people, thin people, black people, ginger people, spotty people, freckly people ect ect
Self-esteem in fat people is no different to self-esteem in any other group. If you have a poor self image then yes, going out will be harder, but let's not make martyrs out of people who have to leave the house like everybody else, to go to work like everybody else and who may be picked on like a lot of other people (no, I'm not sympathetic... I've grown up around people with disabilities that they cannot change, in most cases people CAN change being fat).
I have nothing against over-weight people and all people are beautiful to me... But I think some people are over-playing the whole 'woe is me for being fat and thus not accepted' card. At least you're not likely to face violence for your weight. People have been murdered for being gay or transgendered for example... Aren't you lucky that's not going to happen to you?
And at the end of the day, why does anyone need other people's approval to be happy?
Yep, I've seen this happen to people too. People who try to watch what they eat and keep a regular gym routine get mocked for 'wasting their life as they only live once' etc. For girls I've only really seen it as a passing comment, but when guys take care of themselves it's a different story.
Now who's turning stuff around? I wouldn't have said a word to the guy (or any fat guy) if he hadn't started acting like a dick first - nothing is sacred when someone does that. He didn't want to possibly get his feelings hurt by what I said? Then don't comment on the appearance of other people.
People have their prejudices. That's human nature and the way it is.
So? Some people are mean. Get the heck over it.
But does that make it right? Or are we talking moral absolutes again?
The key in my opinion, is to be insecure about the things that matter. 1. things you can do something about (no point having insecurities about your height, because it's never going to change), and 2. things that are actually important to your genuine self-worth. Image shouldn't be one of them, but health should.
And I think the main problem that women in particular have, is that in our society, so much of their self-worth and supposed value to society is based on their looks, rather than what they're actually good at. As a bloke, you can say "who gives a shit what I look like, I'm good at sport/intelligent/a talented musician/run a successful business/etc." Whereas a woman seems to need to be good looking in addition to any of those things for anyone to give a shit. In fact, being a good looking tennis player will get you much further than being a good tennis player. Whereas who gave a shit what Michael Schumacher looked like when they made him the richest sportsperson in the world? That's not to say that the likes of weight-gain products and bodybuilding industries aren't propped up on men's insecurities, but it's nowhere near on the same scale.
I disagree, further in which ways and in whos eyes?
Certainly not further in the world of sports.
Lets be honest, if you had two girls, both exactly the same in every way, intelligence, personality etc
But one was much more attractive than the other, which one would you pick?:rolleyes:
I'm not making victims out of anyone, and trust me if I wanted to be condescending I could do and say a lot worse.
It's just some of the people on this website seem to believe that because they haven't experienced things first hand - whether it be insults, self confidence issues, or any of the other things we all discuss on here, that they don't exist. Sorry, but I refuse to accept that having to handle criticism, day in, day out for anything in their lives and still going on as normal cannot be considered as brave. No its not the same as living with a terminal illness, and no one except the people who I've mentioned before seem to think it is. And I don't particularly care what the problem is, I still maintain, if your anything less than perfect in this world and people pick up on it and use it against you regularly then it can take a hell of a lot of courage and bravery to say fuck it and ignore them.
And Kiezo I'm sorry, I understand the wanting to react to abuse, I'm not exactly a calm tempered person myself, but that wasn't so much my point. Not only would it have been easier to have just ignored him or laughed, and walked away knowing you were obviously more secure than him, but reacting back does, like parents always say, makes you as bad. But, because I'm aware whatI've said makes me hypocritical, my main point is - this guy was obviously an idiot, and probably had all sorts to pick at, even if it was just the fact that he felt the need to ridicule you for something - why was his weight the first thing you chose to throw back at him? Because its a physical feature, and an easy one to fault.
And how do you know what we've experienced?
I have been overweight, had self confidence issues and others, and am having some or all of them now!
But it's still not brave to be fat ffs.
We must have a whole nation of brave people lol, us and the states.
being brave by ignoring someones comments about you being fat is not the same thing as actually being fat is brave.
it's not BRAVE at all.
1. possessing or exhibiting courage or courageous endurance.
2. making a fine appearance.
3. Archaic. excellent; fine; admirable
??