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Is there any reason why they could have come back? Change in meds? The stress of starting uni? You've beaten this before, dont let it drag you down. I'm here if you want some support, okay? I mean it as well.
I apologise and feel much better
Whatever you do dont let this put you off going to uni. You have worked pretty hard to get yourself there and you will regret it deeply if you dont go.
Kirsty - What are you worried about exactley, money (yes fees etc are going to cost a lot due to the new rules), living away from home? There is a lot of support available.
I'm worried about the money, I'm living at home whilst at uni hopefully, and commuting everyday- as is only a 45min drive roughly. I'm trying to save up for uni, but it feels like it's too late, as a year today i'll be thinking about going.
Go to uni, have fun, don't stress yourself out with minor issues like having 18 grand of debt. Seriously.
I discovered on Sunday that she cut herself for the first time recently, and although she said she got that sense of strange pleasure from it, she said she wouldn't do it again, and that she was sure of it. So I left it, thinking it would be ok, because she's relatively sensible in that respect. Obviously I had my worries about that whole addictive side to it, but I thought "no, it'll be fine" in my rational mind.
She was picking at the scab today, and from the little I could see, it looked REALLY bad. Worse than any I've ever seen, and certainly worse than I've ever done myself.
She just came on MSN and told me she did it again. At college, this afternoon. Now I don't know what to say to her. Telling her to stop would seem so hypocritical, even though I know she doesn't really like that she's doing it. I don't want to patronise her, and I don't want to make her feel worse than she already does (which, let's be honest, is pretty fucking bad). She says it's just when she's on her own (and when she's around her family, it seems, as they aren't very pro-her atm), and that scares me cause that's pretty much what I'm like. She doesn't want to talk to anyone professional, I know that much, because of things that have happened in her past, and not wanting to get her family involved, but I don't know what else to suggest to her. I'm trying to support her, and stuff, but it's hard, and (I don't mean to sound selfish, cause it's how I feel, but meh) I have so much stuff of my own to concentrate on right now. I'm in my third year of college, if I fuck up this year then I'm pretty much in the shit for good, and I don't know if I'll be able to support her as much as she needs in the meantime.
I just don't know what to do .
As you may well know, I had a friend a few years back with SERIOUS problems with self harm (to the extent she was in hospital several times a week being stitched up).
There was nothing I could do. Like you, I'd be a hypocrite to tell her what she was doing was wrong. All I could do is be there for her. All you can do is be a friend to her.
What is important though, as fiend85 has said, this girl needs to find a way of venting her feelings in other ways. Have you suggested any?
All you can do, is be there for her tbh. Like fiend85 has said, your friend needs help if she cannot vent her feelings in other ways and its becoming a serious problem.
If anyone wants the address for it:
http://www.recoveryourlife.com/
I've been using that website for years. The forums are pretty good too.
There was a documentry on channel4 about this website (it was a program about self harm). Was proper weird seeing some of the people I talk to on tv!!!
Frankly, that seems like a massive cop-out to me, but maybe I shouldn't be surprised.
I agree with this.
Telling people who are self harming that they need help when you are in a similar situation, I don't believe, is hypocritical.
It is hard to accept support even though you know it is the right thing to do and, IMHO, you would be a bad friend if you just told her to keep cutting herself to fuck.
Also, I agree with littlemissy with what she said at the end of her post, can't really add anything else to it tbh.
That isn't what I said though is it.
I said that I would be a hypocrite to tell her what she was doing was wrong if I was doing it myself.That doesn't mean I went telling my friend though that what she was doing was a good thing. I never went up to her and told her to keep cutting herself to fuck! I was just there for her as a friend and supported her. When I did ever try to tell her what she was doing was wrong, she just looked at me as to say "you hypocrite"
I tried to help her but to be honest, she wouldn't really accept it.
I would never ever tell someone it was ok to self harm, EVER. All I've ever done for friends who self harm is try to persuade them not to hurt themselves and be there for them. I've tried to persuade them to get help. In certain situations though, they don't listen as I come across as a hypocrite. I just try my best to be there for them as a friend.
Like I said, cop out.
I'm really worried, I've been suffering from depression for years and recently I keep tryign to kill myself. I've tried to strangle myself twice since Wednesday night and yesterday it got so bad I blacked out. I'm scared but I'm scared to tell my therapist because I don't want to ahve to go and see a psychiatrist / take medication / be threatened with hospital again.
I'm not even sure how seriously to take all this, it just feels like a bad dream. I really don't want to be on my own at the moment but I am and I have to be because no one is around. I'm scared.
Tell your therapist.
You say that you're scared, worried, but then you also say that you don't want to see a psychiartrist/take meds/be threatened with hospital. So what do YOU want to do to get yourself better? You don't have to answer that question here.
Probably nothing.
Sometimes shit is just thrown into our faces yet again and test our limits. Just when things are going really well something always comes up to remind you of bad times / weaknesses.
Hope you're ok.