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Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in General Chat
I am bored and it's still a few hours until I am going to play footie with a few friends. It might be a boring concept, but hey, after all it's snooping around in other peoples privates (no pun intended!).
Specify if it was a sent item or a received item:
"Whoa, she has two daughters and both are throwing me for a loop o_O They gotta have a handsome father." (sent items)
"Nothing sucks more than seeing a fit chick on a family b-day party and finding out that you are related to her." (I have a large family! - sent item)
"Guess you are sleeping already. Unfortunately we just made 4th place, but under the shower I shot another two goals
kidding. Gn8, dream sweet, Matt."
(sent)
"Hey just thought I'd let you know that my period finally came just in case you had been worrying like I was :-P " (received)
"Totally! Since it does not have to be the time that's connecting each other." (received)
"This was the best day on the Island, that I had up to now, even tho nobody came to visit me for the first time, and that means something. You are pretty cool :0) " (Thanks Franz, love you too - received).
"You are such a bad influence on me - spent half the afternoon in bed, now I have 2 rush 2 get my groceries before the shop shuts :-P" (received)
Some were in english, others have been translated.
Your go!
Specify if it was a sent item or a received item:
"Whoa, she has two daughters and both are throwing me for a loop o_O They gotta have a handsome father." (sent items)
"Nothing sucks more than seeing a fit chick on a family b-day party and finding out that you are related to her." (I have a large family! - sent item)
"Guess you are sleeping already. Unfortunately we just made 4th place, but under the shower I shot another two goals
kidding. Gn8, dream sweet, Matt."(sent)
"Hey just thought I'd let you know that my period finally came
just in case you had been worrying like I was :-P " (received)"Totally! Since it does not have to be the time that's connecting each other." (received)
"This was the best day on the Island, that I had up to now, even tho nobody came to visit me for the first time, and that means something. You are pretty cool :0) " (Thanks Franz, love you too - received).
"You are such a bad influence on me - spent half the afternoon in bed, now I have 2 rush 2 get my groceries before the shop shuts :-P" (received)
Some were in english, others have been translated.
Your go!
0
Comments
The best part about these is, that nobody understands the ceherency except yourself
I think Kermit's is rather easy
Someone text him to say they have passed their driving test for the first time and it implies that Kermit took more than one attempt
Easy
It's a game me and a guy have been playing
did you run over any OAPs on your way home? nos da x (revieved, after riding my bike home drunk and crashing into a wall)
Oh, I thought the "pink licence" was a chiffre for something... maybe somethign dodgy.
"How did i get home? I cant remember how i got home, when i left or how i got into bed." Another friend.
Immense party last night
These are all received, 'cause I can't get to my sent:
"Hun, just thinking about you makes me worse"
"Meh. Oh, did your finger hurt when you tried it last night? :P" (I shut my finger in a drawer and like...yeh...)
"I don't have a high sex drive or get horny much, honest..." (denial, tbh)
The rest are all either too dirty or FAR too soppy for you lot tbh
"Dude, yesterday I have been to the fucking airport and I don't know how I got there. I apparently I called Mario and asked him to run me a bath."
Georg after drinking a bottle of cough sirup and half a bottle of czech absinthe.
His doctor has a - kind of - bad name and said that this cough syrup (DXM) mixed with alcohol might have... "funny"... effects.
Sometime in that evening he realized that he's a the airport (1hour of drive at least) and was fucking scared. He called Mario, someone we got to know, who is a notorious druggy. He calmed him down.
The funnyest thing is i've no idea who sent it to me - maybe its someone who thinks i'm mexican!
Got it in one.
Bloody gloating sister, she hasn't shut up and that was weeks ago now :grump:
About £200 quids worth of clothing from the bird.
"I am *so* glad you've found happiness Stace. I hope you can hold onto it for the rest of your days, I really do! You're amazing!
"I think I'm in love with my best friend, Stace. I know she's clumsy and rubbish. She talks too much and likes handbags. She eats too many crisps. She's the most stunningly wonderful person I know. She's so special and amazing, I'd spend the rest of my life with her. You're the most important person in the world to me, Stace. I want to hold you in my arms forever and not let go. xxx"
"Hi honey, how are you? Did you have a nice time at home? I proper miss you. Lotsa luv. Kim xxx"
"I promise that nothing you have told me has made me change my mind about what a gentle, intelligent, beautiful and lovely person you are. Sleep tight princess xxx"
Funny ones:
"Horny? Damnit, I was 2 weeks early!
"So what do you mean weird because I think your weird, is he weirder than you or me or super weird sas? xxx"
"Alcohol isn't the answer, sweet pea"- HAHA. Yea yea WHATEVER!
"Wow, you no longer stick to the kitchen floor! x"
Don't think i want to post any of the other's they are quite private and personal
I don't think the rash had anything to do with the sweet and sour that had just been consumed.
"Hows the hangover?"
"Happy Birthday x"
"auld git have fun"
"Happy Birthday! I tried foning. Hope u are ok. im here if u need someone to talk to. Have a good time x" - (from my big sis
"Happy Birthday! Out tonight?"
"Happy Birthday Brian. Or should that be Brain the Drain. I hope you have a good day"
Well, I hope that was as riveting for you reading that as it was for me typing it all out :yippe:
Need sleep.
I have just sent a text "what time u comin out".
Doesn't that make me sound popular? Sadly the sender had previously been whinging on msn about how he's not good enough for anyone.
Favourite from last weekend:
'Hi it's Jess from downstairs, hope I've got the right number! What r u lot up to tonight, do u fancy going for a drink somewhere, nothing big just somewhere local? Don't worry if not. Tb xxx'
Now there is a Jess downstairs from me, but this wasn't her, just a random stranger.......
'M, I, X, I, N!!'
'No u r not! Ur money is wasted! Ha ha! M says dont call me a bitch or he will fiddle your stats. C U Pilchard Nose!'
'THE BARROW!!!'
All from my over imaginative friend!
"Playing the good housewife? Washing, ironing, sneaking in a bit of Neighbours..."
"How do smelly? I miss you."
"Sunbed - £3. New outfit - £40. Night out on the tiles - £30. Seeing Sim's face when I leave him gobsmacked - priceless."
"10 pints and a dirty doner, it's what South Shields was built on. Woke up skint and alone, but happy."
"I am so thirsty for some Jesus juice. Tell your kid I don't have my mobile but to bring his wallet. Can you believe "jesus" is not on predictive text? I bet it is with BT Cellnet."
"No beer for this kid anymore, been spending loads of time with Rosie and doing Daddy duty. I had a good 12 year career, there will be wine bars going under and turning back into trendy banks."
"A-bubbly, bubbly, bubbly soup/sue. I'm gonna request that tonight - the Boris Johnson remix!"
My ex is called Sim. Random.
Anyway... random texts I received...
'Hey trouble are you still on this number? Jones x'
'I'm fuckin already there Dave! Yeah 31.10.84.'
'Had a top night. Can't wait for this weekend. Night night x'
'Hi Claire, thanks for getting those tickets we'll pay you on Friday when we see you. Jen xxx'
'That picture is fucking ace babe you look proper cheeky!'
'Yeah it was because I got to see you! But I'm going straight to bed when I get home!'
"Hang on - you want a physical check done. So what system is down? Their legs?" (received)
That was in response to telling someone I had rung Ikea to get a stock check (physical, where they go and look on the shelves) and Ikea telling me they couldn't because their computer is down.
"Yeah, I would think they do. Think they sell them in the one by us and that's not very big" (received)
That was part of a discussion about whether Asda sell computer keyboards (which they do, I am typing on a very nice one as we speak
"I will have a word with her. I look forward to your excitedness" (received)
This was from a friend after I had invited him out for a drink with some other friends and told him I had lots of exciting stuff to tell him
Gave me fucking nightmares for ages these few text she sent.
my housemate charlotte replying to my message asking her how she got red wine on the fridge!