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I don't think this is an unpopular opinion really
The standard TheSite Member cop-out
I have not given you any reason to suspect I don't believe your view is something you are confident about and believe strongly in. Again, stop putting words in my mouth.
Why would you assume I think that about you just because you're a woman. Because I'm male? Making a judgement on me based on my gender is, I believe called 'sexism' these days.
I don't smack my daughter each time she is naughty but in 10 years I have used it twice. I believe it has worked for the best. Do you think I'm wrong for that?
How come?
My mum... well, I don't get on with her at all. She used to hit me, up until the day I turned round and hit her straight back. That was when I was about 10/11. She still got up in my face sometimes after that, but I learnt how to restrain her on the floor when I was 13 or so and from then on she never tried anything again. I resent my mum for hitting me as a child, it never taught me a lesson at all, all it did was make me more and more angry.
No you just take a really indignated stance at my opinion because I am not a parent yet.
Now who is making assumptions? I thought I'd point out that I'm a heavily pregnant woman to maybe direct you to the fact that I have considered and reached a decision on how I want to parent my child. Not for any other reason.
Yes I think you're wrong to smack your daughter. No I don't think this makes you a bad parent. Maybe now you can ease up?
I always hated that assumption. It seemed to be that when there are babies around and you look like you've hit puberty that it's the done thing to thrust the baby into your arms. Despite politely rejecting the invitation. Then the entire room stares and silently judges your potential for future motherhood. And if the baby cried it was the most embarassing thing ever because people made jokes. Or was this just me?
I guess we all have different ideas of reality then...
You don't know what my stance is, you're just making assumptions purely because you perceive it to be something you feel strongly about.
Suggesting I have my view because you're a "heavily pregnant woman" sounds very much like throwing in the gender card. I'd have though saying you were "soon-to-be a parent" would have been more apt but whatever works for you.
Yes we can change direction slightly as this is what I'm against. Up until this point you had not said you thought I was 'wrong'. I have no issue with you or anyone else saying that they disagree with smacking children. But I object to being told I am wrong by someone who has not had the experience I've had as a father. I appreciate you saying you do not believe it makes me a bad father, I didn't think you were suggesting it and even if somebody did, I know better. I may not be perfect but I am by no means 'bad'.
I have no doubt that you will know more about parenting than I very soon - I've always believed the maternal bond is somewhat stronger than the paternal. But I assure you that you have no idea of how your world (and possibly your views) will change once you have a child. I am not doubting the strength of conviction of your views now; however they will change (stronger/weaker/different etc) once you are a parent.
Its not the best way of disciplining, but sometimes they bloody need a short sharp shock to actually stop and listen to me and sometimes I just dont have the time, energy or capabilities to control them any other way, and theyre not abused, theyre loved, fed, great little kids, that can be difficult little sods at times. Some people might be calmer and better at some aspects of parenting than me. Im sure many would be a hell of a lot worse.
Im not trying to be the best parent in the world, and in the last 12 years ive tried many different parenting approaches, and i just muddle along mainly.
Sue me.
It isn't an assumption for me to say that you are dismissing my opinion because I am not a parent. You've stated your objection to this a few times now. I think we can be clear on that.
Using the word 'woman' is not a sign of my throwing in the gender card. I am a woman. I think it's common knowledge on this forum that I am indeed in possession of a vagina. My point remains the same whether I had used the words 'expectant parent' or 'up the duff lady'. No where in this thread have I suggested that your opinion is unworthy because you're a father. It's ironic because it must be at least three times now that I've pointed you in the direction of Arctic Roll's post. As a father sorry **current parent** surely his opinion holds some weight with you?
I'd like to suggest that no of course it doesn't. But it's easier for you to dismiss mine and get your hackles up because I'm not a parent.
And I'm well aware, especially at this stage, that my world will change. Thank you.
Real life is often a bit different to the ideals though. A pregnant woman with no other children isnt going to have the first clue about how I cope. Nor is a guy with one kid. With all due respect.
Good, glad to get you on-board.
I've not said or implied that though. I don't know any of you and I'm not the type to write somebody's view off as simply 'wrong' in a case like this.
I object to somebody telling me that something I do in my life is 'wrong' when they don't have the same or similar experience. That's different from saying their opinions are 'wrong'.
Fixed that for you
I'd say that was wrong not least because the law tells me so.
HEADSHOT.
My unpopular opinion which some of you know about is I don't think women need 'equality' in the church because it's already equal. It's fine how it is
If someone is giving you advice about gardening. Youd hope they actually had some gardening experience first, rather than just read a book about plants.
In the case of parenting, its a million times more emotive. You are judging the very core of a person when you judge their parenting skills.
Except for me, because im hard hearted and I KNOW im doing a decent job with what I have, and if youre not on my side or trying to help me, then im not especially interested in your opinions about how i'm doing, and for someone who doesnt have to deal with what I do on a day to day basis, to say if I smack my child, ive already failed. Well, Im not going to even start taking it on board. Ive heard a million parenting arguments, and the smacking debate rages on. Like the breastfeeding debate, like the co sleeping debate, like the santa claus debate, like the every other fucking debate.
Smile and wave boys, smile and wave
And why does the law know better than you?
This thread isn't about the pro/con of smacking.
Discussions arise. The topic will change again.