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I know, right? I had the same thought!
yeah i cant decide now! i wonder if there was a build up?? MoK i await your return! cmon spill
Not really contributing, but I imagine you watching porn with a lab coat and a flip chart eagerly making notes to write a detailed report afterwards :P
Can you? I can be exhausted from a quicky, but rarely mildly satisfied, let alone completely
So you're saying once you've shot your load, you don't feel relieved, you're still continuing to lust straight after orgasm?
While I can (sometimes) ejaculate fairly quickly, an orgasm usually takes at least an hour of build up.
Sure, a good orgasm you mean. Knocking out a quick one that results in ejaculation should still give you an orgasm, likely not as intense, but an orgasm nevertheless. You really simply ejaculate with no orgasm unless you're at it for at least an hour?
I can also orgasm but remain unsatisfied.
I do think porn gives false expectations of sex. I consider that my sexual pleasure comes in waves that vary in size and on orgasmic occasions, the pleasure continues wave after wave until I experience both orgasm and sexual satisfaction.
When I watch porn, I never believe the women in the movies are experiencing the physical and emotional sensations that I do when having decent/good) sex. When I look at the level of engorgement of the female's genetalia, whilst watching hetero porn, I have often noticed and indeed lamented that I didn't believe the woman was having as good a time as her vocal eruptions signifying her visceral pleasure indicated that she were. I find this a turn off- pretending to be in a state of heightened sexual arousal when clearly not.
I also think that porn teaches people weird things about sexual pleasure and orgasm. Including that, porn, (or the porn movies I've watched, which is admittedly few), mostly concludes with the male orgasm, suggesting that his orgasm and ejaculation prompt the end of sexual activity for that occasion. And also implicit within this pattern is the ideology that it is a man's sexual desires that need to be fulfilled within a hetero physical relationship.
But yeah, faking it is TOOOOOOOO easy, especially during intercourse. Not that I really do it anymore, but you know...
yes id agree with that
http://www.time.com/time/2004/sex/article/the_porn_factor_in_the_01a.html
http://artofmanliness.com/2009/05/11/the-problem-with-porn/
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article6999874.ece
there seems to be loads of stuff pointing out the negative effects of porn, has anyone found anything where porn has been seen as a good thing?
I tend to agree that it would be very unsatisfactory to orgasm on penetration, especially as a lot of women (myself included) find it uncomfortable to continue after orgasm. However, there is little difference in this respect to a man who suffers premature ejaculation, I would think. But since I'm not a man, I can only guess - just as you are guessing about the experience of women.
I'll point out you originally said "completely satisifed", and now you're qualifyig....
Yes, I can ejaculate without orgasm. I guess it's a bit like a premature ejaculation? In the more extreme cases it wasn't me that noticed I've done it. That said, I usually get a very mild orgasm-like thing when I ejaculate, but it takes about an hour to get something satisfying. As for the out of this world orgasms, they've all occured between one hour and four hours of activity. Unfortunately, at only five, my sample size is too small to give any weight to those numbers. I would like to increase the confidence in those figures though....
Also lucky me :thumb:
Like I said, it shocked me because it's not something I have ever come across (before or after) but she apparently reacted the same way alot of the time.
Even we we did the whole office-during-work-thing and so didn't have physical foreplay time. Mental worked just as well
Wot, no naked centrefold in Bravo? Whatever has the world come to?!
In all honesty I think that's a bit of a shame - I first came across Bravo on a school trip to Germany and I thought the idea of showing pictures of real teenagers (girls AND boys), together with interviews about their experiences of growing up, sex and relationships was actually a really good one - taught kids that we come in all shapes and sizes etc, and showed a much more realistic picture of different body types than porn or lads mags. I think most of the teens featured were at least around 15, so we're not talking about young teenagers, although some looked like wannabe porn stars, so maybe a bit dodgy....
I had a boyfriend who wanted me to have threesomes, anal sex etc after watching it in porn videos. Not because he thought all women do those things but because he watched it on porn and decided it looked like something he wanted to try.
I also dated a guy who watches alot of porn but likes really "conservative" sex and would never try or expect half the things he likes to watch on porn.
As a woman I actually really enjoy watching porn, particularly girl on girl etc but what I enjoy watching on a porn video is not the same thing I enjoy doing in the bedroom.
Qualifying, in what way am I qualifying? I do not mean orgasm in itself to be what I mean by satisfaction, I mean satisfaction in the sense of having relief from desire. If I were to have a quick wank for example, I might not be satisfied with the actual experience but I'd still be relieved of lust for a while.
Ok well I don't know how common that is but I think for most guys a quickie might be forced and not particularly enjoyable but you'd still gain the satisfaction of relief from your lust so long as you reached climax.
So my point here really is that for women, a quickie isn't going to provide that same satisfaction even with orgasm, satisfaction being the quenching of desire.
One thing most people can agree on I'm sure that the longer the build up, the better the orgasm...for me though, the longer the build up and the better the climax, the more short-lived the satisfaction.
IMO orgasms on penetration are more an orgasmic reaction to penetration than the sort of orgasm a women would typically have mid-coitus.
I'm not guessing on the experience of women, it's well known that women generally cannot feel sexually satisfied (desire quenched) from a couple of minutes of activity, however skilled that activity is.
Although an orgasm that builds longer is usually more intense and longer lasting I feel satisfied even if it does only take a few minutes so I would say that your statement is incorrect.
You seem very sure of your "facts". I'm sure I would not be the only woman on this board to wonder where you are getting your information. It is also, forgive me for saying so, a little arrogant for you to think that you know more about a woman's experience of sex than we do.
Let's put deconstructing the phallogocentrism of porn aside and think about sex betweem a man and a woman in real, practical terms. When a man orgasms he is relieved of desire, his dick goes floppy and he often feels like going to sleep.
So sexual activity does end with male orgasm, for the reason that he is no longer aroused sexually but drained sexually, his desire is satisfied, albeit temporarily. That could change in a few minutes and they're back at it, repeating the cycle and having several more rounds, but it's something inescapable - man has orgasm, man withdraws and rests.
Now, what you suggest as an alternative to the notion that sex between a man and a woman finishes once a man orgasms, and what exactly would be involved post-orgasm in this alternative?
When I posted this in response to another post -
You replied -
Now you seem to disagree with the idea that men are easier satisfied than women?
I'll forgive you, since you've misread what I've posted. Or maybe you didn't misread it at all, maybe I actually did say I know more about women's sexual experience than women do themselves, and maybe you can point out where I've made this claim? :thumb:
I see how you might have interpreted my response that way, but I was simply agreeing with your assertion that men feel under pressure to perform.
I get my sexual satisfaction first then turn over to stroke my skin gently in sensitised bliss. If the bloke then pulls himself off or whatever, that's up to him but my sexual involvement finishes when I have no further need of the fella.
Isn't that the way all real women fuck men?
This. Besides, I kind of enjoy getting my partner off. It pleases me to know that he is pleased with whatever it is that I'm doing. I can't imagine just rolling over and being like, "yeah, you can take care of yourself now, I'm done". o_0
Ok, I see what you've done there.
Now please tell me
That assertion was predicated on female satisfacton being harder to achieve - so in restrospect, your agreement is more of a disagreement.