If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Best Of
Take part in Samaritans research study
Hi everyone,
Samaritans have reached out to us and they are looking for young people who have seen, posted, or engaged with self-harm or suicide content online to take part in a survey. The aim of the study is to help make the internet a safer and more inclusive place.
The questions asked in the survey could be triggering for some people who struggle with self-harm and suicidal feelings so please make sure to complete the survey when you are feeling okay to do so, and do reach out to services such as Crisis Messenger or Samaritans if you need any support after completing the survey.
Here's a bit more information about the survey from Samaritans:
The survey is currently live and can be found here along with the Participant Information Sheet: https://mdxl.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_cNFvDsPuHl6rJDU
Thank you
The Mix Team
Samaritans have reached out to us and they are looking for young people who have seen, posted, or engaged with self-harm or suicide content online to take part in a survey. The aim of the study is to help make the internet a safer and more inclusive place.
The questions asked in the survey could be triggering for some people who struggle with self-harm and suicidal feelings so please make sure to complete the survey when you are feeling okay to do so, and do reach out to services such as Crisis Messenger or Samaritans if you need any support after completing the survey.
Here's a bit more information about the survey from Samaritans:
We are currently recruiting participants for a survey examining the impact of viewing and posting online content related to suicide and self-harm. This research is part of the Samaritans Online Excellence Programme and we are working in partnership with Middlesex University, the University of Birmingham, and Canterbury Christ Church University.
The survey is open to people aged 16 and over who currently live in the UK. People can take part in this survey if they have ever seen, posted, or engaged with self-harm or suicide content online. You do not need to have personal experience of self-harm or suicidal feelings to take part in this survey.
The survey is currently live and can be found here along with the Participant Information Sheet: https://mdxl.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_cNFvDsPuHl6rJDU
Thank you

The Mix Team

2
Care Experienced Week 2021!!
23/10-31/10 is care experienced week. I'm celebrating with my advocacy group and other care experienced young people.
Exciting things have been planned for this week.
Exciting things have been planned for this week.
3 quick and easy exercises to give you some headspace
Sometimes when things are feeling really intense, having a few simple things to focus your mind can be a great way of calming things down. I thought it could be helpful for someone out there to throw a few ideas of things you can do when feeling stressed. Do feel free to add your own to the thread or tell us how you found these. Also important to note that these may not work for you, and that is okay, we are all different and life isn't a one-sized-fits-all approach 
Memory game
This is a quick one, open the spoiler to view a picture, spend a few minutes trying to memorise as many things from the picture as possible. Perhaps set yourself a timer and try just to focus on what you can see. After the time is up, close the spoiler and try writing down or saying out loud as many pictures that you can remember. If you want to mix it up a bit, set yourself a pattern or order to try and remember e.g. in rows, or going from top to bottom like a snake.
5.4.3.2.1. exercise
This is a game that focuses on your 5 senses (Taste, sight, hearing, touch, smell - you can modify these if you are blind or deaf). Working down from 5, focus on your surroundings and identify 5 things that you can see, then 4 things you can hear etc. I would recommend taste being your 1 thing as likely not many options depending on where you are
Category game
Think of a category that has lots of options for example names of albums if you are in to music. The more generic the better. Then have a go at listing as many things that fit into that category. It may be helpful to try and write these down with a pen or paper to aid your focus on the task.
As an extension of this, you could try and think of things that happen in some kind of order, for example I am quite into my sport, and so I will focus on who won grand slams in tennis each year going backwards and think about how far back I can go.
Let us know if you try any of these and whether they helped you take your mind of things or not. Remember, none of this is about perfection, so there is no stress in getting it "right". It is purely about allowing your brain to breathe

Memory game
This is a quick one, open the spoiler to view a picture, spend a few minutes trying to memorise as many things from the picture as possible. Perhaps set yourself a timer and try just to focus on what you can see. After the time is up, close the spoiler and try writing down or saying out loud as many pictures that you can remember. If you want to mix it up a bit, set yourself a pattern or order to try and remember e.g. in rows, or going from top to bottom like a snake.

5.4.3.2.1. exercise
This is a game that focuses on your 5 senses (Taste, sight, hearing, touch, smell - you can modify these if you are blind or deaf). Working down from 5, focus on your surroundings and identify 5 things that you can see, then 4 things you can hear etc. I would recommend taste being your 1 thing as likely not many options depending on where you are

Category game
Think of a category that has lots of options for example names of albums if you are in to music. The more generic the better. Then have a go at listing as many things that fit into that category. It may be helpful to try and write these down with a pen or paper to aid your focus on the task.
As an extension of this, you could try and think of things that happen in some kind of order, for example I am quite into my sport, and so I will focus on who won grand slams in tennis each year going backwards and think about how far back I can go.
Let us know if you try any of these and whether they helped you take your mind of things or not. Remember, none of this is about perfection, so there is no stress in getting it "right". It is purely about allowing your brain to breathe


3
Re: Cannabis Information | What Is A Whitey | Effects Of Weed | The Mix
"There’s also a distinct difference between this type of weed (known as medicinal weed) and the stuff you get on the streets."
There's no real difference between weed grown in a lab and weed gown in a bedroom or weed grown in the garden.
While a more controlled environment might produce more potent weed it's not necessarily the case. And there are thousands of different strains with differenet levels of THC and cannaboids, but to suggest there is a distinct difference between 'medical weed' and blackmarket weed is simply not correct.
All weed purhcased in the UK is illegal and sold via the blackmarket. Whilst some growers/sellers may attempt to increase the yield weight with water there's little evidence of a problem with them adding anything else.
And it's an absolute myth to suggest that dealers lace weed with other more expensive drugs. The suggestion above that weed is laced with heroin is quite absurd. Apart from the fact there is absolutely no evidence of this ever happening, why would a dealer lace a cheaper drugs with a more expensive one, when it would be more profitable selling them seperately.
These are myths that have been ciculating for years. Doesn't happen.
There's no real difference between weed grown in a lab and weed gown in a bedroom or weed grown in the garden.
While a more controlled environment might produce more potent weed it's not necessarily the case. And there are thousands of different strains with differenet levels of THC and cannaboids, but to suggest there is a distinct difference between 'medical weed' and blackmarket weed is simply not correct.
All weed purhcased in the UK is illegal and sold via the blackmarket. Whilst some growers/sellers may attempt to increase the yield weight with water there's little evidence of a problem with them adding anything else.
And it's an absolute myth to suggest that dealers lace weed with other more expensive drugs. The suggestion above that weed is laced with heroin is quite absurd. Apart from the fact there is absolutely no evidence of this ever happening, why would a dealer lace a cheaper drugs with a more expensive one, when it would be more profitable selling them seperately.
These are myths that have been ciculating for years. Doesn't happen.

1
Re: Cannabis Information | What Is A Whitey | Effects Of Weed | The Mix
It's really interesting to see everyone's different takes on this, and I think it's wonderful that we're all learning from each other. It's so hard to know what is 100% fact or fiction when it comes to drugs, especially given their illegal status, which makes a lot of peoples' lives harder. Hopefully, we can continue to learn and share information and aim for easier and safer experiences with drugs 

Re: Hard for me to find what to talk about in relationships advice?
Hi @_Tech_Addict_Girl,
Thanks for reaching out to us. I often find common interests a good place to start. Does this help?
Thanks for reaching out to us. I often find common interests a good place to start. Does this help?

Re: Worried about anxiety getting worse
Hi @Dandelion , bless you, it sounds as if things are really worrying you at the moment- I definitely have been there! Although I completely agree with @Kat that it is important that you seek some help with how you're feeling, I can see why you might not want to contact your uni's wellbeing services, my experience with them wasn't the best at my uni either.
Uni is such a strange experience, not to mention during COVID times, so it understandable that you feel apprehensive about starting your third year after having a tough time in your second year. I'm wondering what kind of support you have around you at the moment, are you living with friends? It is so important that you continue to talk about your feelings, and we will be here to listen
Uni is such a strange experience, not to mention during COVID times, so it understandable that you feel apprehensive about starting your third year after having a tough time in your second year. I'm wondering what kind of support you have around you at the moment, are you living with friends? It is so important that you continue to talk about your feelings, and we will be here to listen

Re: Worried about anxiety getting worse
Hiya @Dandelion
I'm sorry to hear that you feel your anxiety is getting worse again. This must be hard to cope with especially because you have struggled in the past and fear that you will have a bad experience again. But I want to reassure you that you are doing everything right to make the situation better than before. You have already recognised that your anxiety is increasing and admitting this and sharing this with us is such a brave and positive first step to dealing effectively with your anxiety. It's great that you have said that you don't want your anxiety to get bad again because it shows you are willing to work on your anxiety.
I think the best thing to do is look back at your second year and identify what is was about university that made you anxious. Was it the workload, deadlines, socialising or something else? Then think about what you enjoyed about your placement year. Once you have identified was it is about university that makes you anxious, you can start to work on these areas. For example if the workload makes you anxious, put in place steps such as using a to-do list app. Then when thinking about what you enjoyed in your placement year hopefully you can bring some of the things you enjoyed into this year.
You say that you don't want to talk to your university's wellbeing centre and I wonder why this is? Personally, I used my university's wellbeing service and they gave me a space to talk about things that were worry me and helped to teach me ways to cope with anxiety such as breathing exercises and strategies to deal with things like perfectionism. I know all university's are different but the wellbeing service is there to help you and I would really recommend reaching out to someone. But I fully understand if you do not want to but instead I'm wondering if you could reach out to any family or friends, just so you are not having to deal with the anxiety all on your own? And of course we are always here for you too.
Some other things I used to use for anxiety were meditation apps or Youtube videos of calming sounds like rain to help soothe me.
I hope some of this helpful, sending you lots of hugs
Just because second year was tough doesn't mean that this year will be the same.
I'm sorry to hear that you feel your anxiety is getting worse again. This must be hard to cope with especially because you have struggled in the past and fear that you will have a bad experience again. But I want to reassure you that you are doing everything right to make the situation better than before. You have already recognised that your anxiety is increasing and admitting this and sharing this with us is such a brave and positive first step to dealing effectively with your anxiety. It's great that you have said that you don't want your anxiety to get bad again because it shows you are willing to work on your anxiety.
I think the best thing to do is look back at your second year and identify what is was about university that made you anxious. Was it the workload, deadlines, socialising or something else? Then think about what you enjoyed about your placement year. Once you have identified was it is about university that makes you anxious, you can start to work on these areas. For example if the workload makes you anxious, put in place steps such as using a to-do list app. Then when thinking about what you enjoyed in your placement year hopefully you can bring some of the things you enjoyed into this year.
You say that you don't want to talk to your university's wellbeing centre and I wonder why this is? Personally, I used my university's wellbeing service and they gave me a space to talk about things that were worry me and helped to teach me ways to cope with anxiety such as breathing exercises and strategies to deal with things like perfectionism. I know all university's are different but the wellbeing service is there to help you and I would really recommend reaching out to someone. But I fully understand if you do not want to but instead I'm wondering if you could reach out to any family or friends, just so you are not having to deal with the anxiety all on your own? And of course we are always here for you too.
Some other things I used to use for anxiety were meditation apps or Youtube videos of calming sounds like rain to help soothe me.
I hope some of this helpful, sending you lots of hugs

Re: I am disgusting (TW:suicidal feelings)
@Kate_20 when having your same thoughts everything else around me always seems insignificant, like a scary joke. How could I return to studying after feeling like/being near death?
The cheese and the soup are perfect examples of that. Not enjoying them feels like a sign that you can't really enjoy anything anymore, everything is boring when compared to your own terrifying thoughts.
But there should be no shame attached to them. It is not like they can be changed on demand. You also have to take the action that you have to take in response to them - the hospital. Still they can be examined, look at from a distance. When I do, I see that my mind has completely taken over, and in that moment it decides to only think about death. I then feel like I am only a temporary prisoner of my feelings.
What do you see if you try to look at your feelings like that?
The cheese and the soup are perfect examples of that. Not enjoying them feels like a sign that you can't really enjoy anything anymore, everything is boring when compared to your own terrifying thoughts.
But there should be no shame attached to them. It is not like they can be changed on demand. You also have to take the action that you have to take in response to them - the hospital. Still they can be examined, look at from a distance. When I do, I see that my mind has completely taken over, and in that moment it decides to only think about death. I then feel like I am only a temporary prisoner of my feelings.
What do you see if you try to look at your feelings like that?
Re: Is 'White Racism' real?
REVERSE RACISM IS A MYTH
While assumptions and stereotypes about white people do exist, this is considered racial prejudice, not racism. Racial prejudice refers to a set of discriminatory or derogatory attitudes based on assumptions derived from perceptions about race and/or skin colour. Thus, racial prejudice can indeed be directed at white people (e.g., “White people can’t dance”) but is not considered racism because of the systemic relationship to power. When backed with power, prejudice results in acts of discrimination and oppression against groups or individuals. In Canada, white people hold this cultural power due to Eurocentric modes of thinking, rooted in colonialism, that continue to reproduce and privilege whiteness. It is whiteness that has the power to define the terms of racialized others’ existence. Tim Wise explains how, for white individuals,
“When a group of people [such as racialized individuals] has little or no power over you institutionally, they don’t get to define the terms of your existence, they can’t limit your opportunities, and you needn’t worry much about the use of a slur to describe you and yours, since, in all likelihood, the slur is as far as it’s going to go. What are they going to do next: deny you a bank loan? Yeah, right. … White perceptions are what end up counting in a white-dominated society. If whites say [Indigenous people] are savages (be they of the “noble” or vicious type), then by God, they’ll be seen as savages. If [Indigenous people] say whites are mayonnaise-eating Amway salespeople, who the hell is going to care? If anything, whites will simply turn it into a marketing opportunity. When you have the power, you can afford to be self-deprecating, after all” (2002).
Ricky Sherover-Marcuse asserts that "we should not confuse the occasional mistreatment experienced by whites at the hands of people of color with the systematic and institutionalized mistreatment experienced by people of color at the hands of whites” (p. 2). While expressions of racial prejudice directed at white people may hurt the white person/people individually or personally, and are never to be condoned, they do not have the power or authority to affect the white person's social/economic/political location and privileges.
“Racism has nothing to do with feelings. It is a measurable reality that white people are not subject to, regardless of their income or status” (Harriot, 2018).
Reverse racism is a myth because it attempts to ignore the power/privilege dynamic between the individuals/groups involved; the myth of reverse racism assumes that racism occurs on a so-called level playing field, when in actuality, it does not. One claim of “reverse racism” that is often made is in relation to affirmative actions programs: programs that were created to help ensure that non-white individuals are given equal consideration and opportunities, whether it is in regards to employment, school, or scholarships etc. For white individuals, programs such as this might feel like something is being “taken away.” Zeba Blay outlines how white people often "believe deserving white students are discriminated against while academically unqualified students are given highly coveted college or company positions ― just because they happen to tick the ‘ethnic minority’ box. This argument ignores the fact that affirmative action did not come out of nowhere ― there was a need for a system that would address the decades of underrepresentation of people of color both academically and in the job world.” Sherover-Marcuse explains how "[a]ffirmative action programs are attempts to repair the results of institutionalized racism by setting guidelines and establishing procedures for finding qualified applicants from all segments of the population” (p. 2). In other words, these programs do not privilege people of colour but are an attempt to “level” the not-so-level playing field that has historically privileged a certain type of candidate.
While assumptions and stereotypes about white people do exist, this is considered racial prejudice, not racism. Racial prejudice refers to a set of discriminatory or derogatory attitudes based on assumptions derived from perceptions about race and/or skin colour. Thus, racial prejudice can indeed be directed at white people (e.g., “White people can’t dance”) but is not considered racism because of the systemic relationship to power. When backed with power, prejudice results in acts of discrimination and oppression against groups or individuals. In Canada, white people hold this cultural power due to Eurocentric modes of thinking, rooted in colonialism, that continue to reproduce and privilege whiteness. It is whiteness that has the power to define the terms of racialized others’ existence. Tim Wise explains how, for white individuals,
“When a group of people [such as racialized individuals] has little or no power over you institutionally, they don’t get to define the terms of your existence, they can’t limit your opportunities, and you needn’t worry much about the use of a slur to describe you and yours, since, in all likelihood, the slur is as far as it’s going to go. What are they going to do next: deny you a bank loan? Yeah, right. … White perceptions are what end up counting in a white-dominated society. If whites say [Indigenous people] are savages (be they of the “noble” or vicious type), then by God, they’ll be seen as savages. If [Indigenous people] say whites are mayonnaise-eating Amway salespeople, who the hell is going to care? If anything, whites will simply turn it into a marketing opportunity. When you have the power, you can afford to be self-deprecating, after all” (2002).
Ricky Sherover-Marcuse asserts that "we should not confuse the occasional mistreatment experienced by whites at the hands of people of color with the systematic and institutionalized mistreatment experienced by people of color at the hands of whites” (p. 2). While expressions of racial prejudice directed at white people may hurt the white person/people individually or personally, and are never to be condoned, they do not have the power or authority to affect the white person's social/economic/political location and privileges.
“Racism has nothing to do with feelings. It is a measurable reality that white people are not subject to, regardless of their income or status” (Harriot, 2018).
Reverse racism is a myth because it attempts to ignore the power/privilege dynamic between the individuals/groups involved; the myth of reverse racism assumes that racism occurs on a so-called level playing field, when in actuality, it does not. One claim of “reverse racism” that is often made is in relation to affirmative actions programs: programs that were created to help ensure that non-white individuals are given equal consideration and opportunities, whether it is in regards to employment, school, or scholarships etc. For white individuals, programs such as this might feel like something is being “taken away.” Zeba Blay outlines how white people often "believe deserving white students are discriminated against while academically unqualified students are given highly coveted college or company positions ― just because they happen to tick the ‘ethnic minority’ box. This argument ignores the fact that affirmative action did not come out of nowhere ― there was a need for a system that would address the decades of underrepresentation of people of color both academically and in the job world.” Sherover-Marcuse explains how "[a]ffirmative action programs are attempts to repair the results of institutionalized racism by setting guidelines and establishing procedures for finding qualified applicants from all segments of the population” (p. 2). In other words, these programs do not privilege people of colour but are an attempt to “level” the not-so-level playing field that has historically privileged a certain type of candidate.