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difficult night / episode of depression

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I also want to reflect that - although it might not help when you're in the midst of it - it is really positive that you could identify those feelings as an 'episode' as you said and relate them back to previous expeirences you've had. It's healthy to be doing that.
How you feeling today?
Mod note: I did get Billie to split these posts off from the main hugs thread, because I got the sense things were feeling really heavy and this was a stream of concsciousness for you, so I thought it would make more sense for you to have it in your own thread.
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Wise Owl
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Contacting NHS 24 sounds like a smart idea.
I wonder if it's also worth making a mini plan for what you could do if they don't help? Particularly if (as you said) you know it won't end well. Even if it's just small things that keep you that little bit safer, or make things that little bit less dark. Whether that's watching a movie, doing something physical or fidgety, being out the house, etc. Watever that means for you.
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Does it feel like everything is super overwhelming right now, like your surroundings suddenly become louder and your thoughts also become louder and it feels like everything is too much at the same time?. Hoping you are okay though
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Billie the bot deserves an award
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How are you feeling now? I noticed that you mentioned having 2 hours sleep and I'm wondering do you often struggle with sleep? I think sometimes a lack of sleep can make mental health a lot worse. If this might be the case for you, then it might be worthwhile thinking about how you can try to get better sleep, in the hopes of trying to improve your mental health a bit, while you wait for your next appointment.
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