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ppl, alcohol and addiction

ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
im safe now coz im in a different now :). my cleaner asks to hav a drink with me after he is done, instead of no alchol beer, he buys a 10.99 bottle of whisky. we hav a few, he makes them doubles, but it looks big without measure, after done he leaves., without locking the door n drives home. could anything hpn. is he a toxic/abusive person? and can tht make u want more?

Comments

  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    i had support workers do it too
  • Lucy307Lucy307 UKPosts: 964 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi Ellie, have you told your mum about this? It doesn’t sound like this is appropriate behaviour for either cleaners or support workers to me but I feel your mum may be able to help?
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    yes, will the alcahol come up in my blood test if its a full body 1?
  • AislingDMAislingDM Posts: 326 Moderator
    Heya @ellie2000 just wanted to check in to see how you're doing at the moment, as has already been said, that should not be something that cleaners or support workers are doing and you deserve to feel safe around these people. I hope you've been able to confide in your mum about this as you really do deserve support. <3 In terms of the alcohol showing up in your blood test, I've read online that if they are looking for alcohol it can remain in your blood for up to 28 days here is the link:

    https://www.dnalegal.com/blog/how-long-do-drugs-and-alcohol-stay-your-system

    We're here for you Ellie <3
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    ppl do things which i cant control
  • kaishapb_15kaishapb_15 Posts: 16 Settling in
    Hey @ellie2000 how are you? I agree with the comments above this is inappropriate behaviour from the cleaner, is there anyone at home you can talk to about this to prevent it from happening in the future?

    We are all here if you feel unsafe and need someone to turn to <3
  • kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 74 Budding Regular
    Hi @ellie2000.
    I understand that it's something you can't control, as it's your cleaner's actions, and maybe you feel like you can't say no (correct me if I'm wrong). You said that you'd told your mum about this, which is great! That's such a brave thing for you to do!

    Could you maybe speak to your mum about getting a different cleaner? As everyone has already said, it's not appropriate what he's doing at all, and it might be best if he no longer worked for you, to help make you safe.

    I hope you're well.
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    ppl do my head in
  • maryam852maryam852 Posts: 63 Boards Initiate
    @ellie2000 Are you feeling ok currently? Can you clarify how much you both drank and think about whether you are interpreting the situation out of context? I say this because you both drank alcohol .I understand how confused you must have felt but thank you for asking for help.
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    i felt pressured, i feel like i have to make ppl happy, or something bad will happen
  • maryam852maryam852 Posts: 63 Boards Initiate
    @ellie2000 That is a completely valid response, do you think you can tell me a little more about that? It may be helpful to consider why you feel the need to make people happy. What feelings do you have surrounding this pressure and can you clarify what 'bad' things will happen to you? Remember that it is completely natural to feel pressured sometimes and the feeling will subside. Do you think you can work on some tactics of saying no even when you feel pressured?
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    hope you're ok @ellie2000 feel free to pm
    XLillyX
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    before the sexual assault, they sed 'ellie, plz come out' they started groveling 4 money. i went out bc i was getting bullied at home, they were alright at first. they let me join them in the carpark to drink the alcohol they bought with my money, they started bullying me online and i still went out with them, they stole my phone and then i got taxi to go home. they called me on the lanline telling me they had my phone, they lead me to then park where they sed it was, they led me into a nite of hell. i couldnt ring mum coz she was out 4 her birthday. i was stripped naked, sexually assualted and tied up left 4 dead till morning. no-one knew, i got yelled at bc mums bf thought i sent a nasty txt, so i told no-one wat hpnd. i started to chat on chat-avenue coz i felt lonely, it turned out they were sodep. i carried on tlkn to them till the police came nd dekcuf me up completely. i felt n still feel dead to this day. i started to drink but i stopped 3yrs after.
    tht cleaner although im now 16 had me drink whisky with him :( he's fired now. did he start me on a habit this day. FML
    'sing me ur lullaby. so i can go....peacefully'
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    as i was 'weak' police tortured me for the 3yrs.

    gnikcuf sgip haha
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    this is y i need therapy, everywhere i tried to make friends thing would go wrong
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    t nice
    ellie2000 wrote: »
    before the sexual assault, they sed 'ellie, plz come out' they started groveling 4 money. i went out bc i was getting bullied at home, they were alright at first. they let me join them in the carpark to drink the alcohol they bought with my money, they started bullying me online and i still went out with them, they stole my phone and then i got taxi to go home. they called me on the lanline telling me they had my phone, they lead me to then park where they sed it was, they led me into a nite of hell. i couldnt ring mum coz she was out 4 her birthday. i was stripped naked, sexually assualted and tied up left 4 dead till morning. no-one knew, i got yelled at bc mums bf thought i sent a nasty txt, so i told no-one wat hpnd. i started to chat on chat-avenue coz i felt lonely, it turned out they were sodep. i carried on tlkn to them till the police came nd dekcuf me up completely. i felt n still feel dead to this day. i started to drink but i stopped 3yrs after.
    tht cleaner although im now 16 had me drink whisky with him :( he's fired now. did he start me on a habit this day. FML
    'sing me ur lullaby. so i can go....peacefully'



    i been sexually assaulted 3 times it isn
    XLillyX
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    i wish i was dedrum
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    i was building life up then the police put me on some paper blowing things out of proportion , it ended but i got no notification. so i think its still going, im not a bad girl
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    but i think im skanky coz i get reminded of it
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    nd named called, ppl r c----ts
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    ellie2000 wrote: »
    but i think im skanky coz i get reminded of it

    go ask for support. @TheMix please help her.
    XLillyX
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    shout 85258

    @TheMix phone,webchat or by email

    papryus if suicidal ( aka hopelineuk ) phone,webchat and text.

    please be ok @ellie2000

    @TheMix may be able to help.
    this is trriggering for me because of the sexual assault but feel free to reach out

    take care, summer
    XLillyX
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    sorry if i sounded rude, it was triggering and pushing my PTSD down the hill regarding all 3 rapes but sorry guys i didn't mean to sound rude.
    XLillyX
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    chop all willies off, multiple boys was 'havin fun' tht nite
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    i vent here coz its easier help, sorry
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    if u dont wna die n dont wna live either wat do u do
    XLillyX
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    ellie2000 wrote: »
    if u dont wna die n dont wna live either wat do u do

    i wana die :( i feel fucked and give up :(
    XLillyX
  • summerxo21summerxo21 LondonPosts: 321 The Mix Regular
    ellie2000 wrote: »
    chop all willies off, multiple boys was 'havin fun' tht nite

    i shouldn't giggle but that is funny the first part 'chop all willies of' and they were they took advantage of me but fuck them
  • ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 1,603 Extreme Poster
    ppl used to remind me tht i f'd up everyday before, during lockdown i felt better
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