If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Take a look around and enjoy reading the discussions. If you'd like to join in, it's really easy to register and then you'll be able to post. If you'd like to learn what this place is all about, head here.
Comments
Everyone else is seen as nice by default. And yes, I don't fancy every person I see. But most people at least have someone checking them out. I feel bad when no one does it to me.
I know that everybody is different. But i just hate being the odd one out.
How often to you leave your house with a smile on your face?
You need to come across as an approachable person, before you can expect someone to want to come over to talk to you.
Someone here said I'm rude, and I admit I can be sometimes. But because people appear hostile I think I owe them nothing and it snowballs.
Whether its intentional or not I cant tell but you are pushing me towards just being quite insulting. I dont know whether you have ever used a message board before, or talked to anyone in your entire life, but there is such a thing as listening. You hear or read something and it goes in, you think about it and consider 'hmm, perhaps that might be true'. You seem completely unable to actually take in anything anyone has written.
A) There is no such thing as a normal life
Most people when it comes down to it look out for themselves (human nature really)
C) Just because someone is in a relationship does not make them happy
D) Endlessly comparing your life to other peoples will never make you happy
It is also true that nobody has it 'completely easy' in life. If it appears this way then there is almost certainly something you don't know about them or some aspect of their life or their history that you've just not seen for whatever reason. We can never know everything about a person, not even ourselves.
We can't show you that nobody has a perfect life though as we can never know enough about everyone, but we can show you that not everyone has a perfect life, there is so much pain and suffering felt by so many people on so many levels. Even amongst your own peers - people of roughly your age, living in roughly the same conditions etc, there is so much suffering and pain. The world is a very broken place. Life does hurt.
I don't doubt that your life is difficult but maybe you could work on the idea of emphaphy for others with your counsellor? It might help you feel better about yourself if you could see that you are not as 'different' as you imagine.
One of my very good friends got their A2 results today. They got 3 A grades, and by god do they deserve it. I have watched them through suicidal lows and hoped to hell that they would fight through it and still be alive in the morning. They worked so, so, SO hard to get the grades they have and if you dare suggest that they had it easier than you or that they were somehow given an advantage in life I will be forced to hunt you down and slap you.
They all have something wrong with their eyes (same as me) which causes them to wobble and causes poor vision.
:yes:
What is it you actually want? And how do you know that most people having someone checking them out?
Maybe if you weren't so negative, then you'd be a lot more approachable.
or though its not for the faint hearted wading into the P&D section?
You might suprise yourself with what you have to offer to others
OK. But how?
i know no one owes anybody anything.
But why should they have a special right to love? Everyone has a need for affliliation and closeness so I don't see why I should miss out.
I can't help it. Everyone else seems so happy and content.
Where did budda say people have a right to love?
You're the only person who change the fact that you're not with anyone.
Is this how you speak to everyone you meet?
Noone has a "right" to love. people just fall in love here and there. noone has a right to it.
People "seeming" happy and content to you, doesnt actually mean they are. In fact you are soooo unperceptive, id almost go so far as to say that you probably couldnt tell either way what someone was going through. It seems like you only believe what you want to believe and dont actually care if its true or not
No. I just didn't understand what he meant.
But that's what he was suggesting. He was saying that relationships are for certain people and not others and I disagree with that.
But I don't know whether people are suffering or not.
Because it just seems logical. That's why most people get in relationships.
I have little to be positive about.
He said nothing like that. He said that there are people in relationships who aren't happy. You're the one going on about rights to love.
He wasnt saying that at all, and you just have to take peoples word for it that theydont have an easy life. People dont just go around lying about stuff like that. What would be the point??
Fab Advice (once again :razz:). Put across perfectly. I just hope the OP reads it fully and takes it in as it sums up the issue in hand by the reads of things!
I am 24 years old, married, mortgage, cats (no kids), professional job and happy.
I have a friend who I went to uni with who is not in a relationship, doesn't have a house (owned - she rents), doesn't have kids but extremely happy.
Which of us is the most 'normal'?
Also, who is to say that once you achieve all of these things you would be happy?
And another thing, with this current attitude that you have of 'the world owes me everything, I deserve so much more' you will not get into a relationship. Prospective partners would run a mile. These are not attractive qualities to have in a person.
Most people my age have had lots of relationships. i feel bad in missing out. in society if you don't date you're considered a loser. and why would a prospective partner run a mile.
Off-topic, I'd HATE to be married in my early 20s!! Couldn't possibly imagine spending the rest of my whole life just sleeping with one person when I'm that young. Would feel like I'm missing out on all the other girls out there.. really want to shag as many girls as possible until into my early 30s, to know I've made the most of it all. Others will of course disagree..
Says who? I know of quite a few people who have not had serious relationships by the time they are 25. Quite a few. Including the person I mentioned. However, I will go to that wonderful phrase and say that age ain't nothing but a number
If it was me, I would not want to date someone like you, who seems to think that the world owes you everything. You seem to have a rather distorted view of life. And one that is not attractive. If you pine for a relationship then it puts people off. Simple as, tbh.
I notice that you decline to answer my question.
It is not irrelevant. The OP originally stated that they wanted an easy time. Having all of these things does not equate an easy time.
Good job everyone's different, eh?
Says society.
i know that no one is owed anything. and i dont realise that i have a distorted view of life. and i also dont know why its not attractive.
Yes it would make me happy.
Well, clearly that's not true judging by your posts in other threads...