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Riceboys - Do you have this problem in th UK?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in General Chat
The United States has recently been plagued by yet another social scourge, Riceboys.
These people take imported average performance cars (mostly Japanese, Honda Civic and Accords being most popular) and invest a lot of money trying to make the car look /sound like a drag racer (ex: lots of stickers, racing stripes, humongous spoilers, etc..)
Now, I’m a firm believer in the “whatever blows your skirt up” philosophy…but something REALLY needs to be done about this. They seem to think that now that their cars look like drag racers, they really ARE drag racers, and it’s very embarrassing. They boast of Nitrous Oxide injection kits (guaranteed to burn through the pistons in under 1000 miles), an exhaust tip which resembles a chromed coffee can that (supposedly) adds 5-20 horsepower, a spoiler to increase drag coefficients almost the size of a DC-9 horizontal stabilizer/empennage, tires that stick out a foot from the car body and openly brag about turning a 17 second quarter mile. I’ve seen shopping carts rolling thru parking lots faster than that. Anything slower than 14 seconds is mediocre. I still have yet to meet one of these boneheads who has any clue at all what drag coefficient is.
This is kind of like duct taping a butane powered potato launcher to the front of a lawn tractor and calling it a tank.
At least once a week, I am confronted at a traffic light by some dumbass driving what looks to be an oversized baby stroller with a shitty paint job and sounds like a gas powered food processor, wanting to drag race me in my beat up Ford Taurus by revving his engine and trying to verbally taunt me (this is equivalent to challenging the residents of a nursing home to an arm wrestling tournament and calling all who decline “pussies” in hopes of impressing your girlfriend). I perform the “3 light” countermeasure:
First traffic light – Riceboy pulls up next to me, revs engine and waits for eye contact. I look at him, then look over his car quizzically, shake my head and laugh, then turn my attention back to the road as if he wasn’t even there. He tears off when the light turns green, I take my time to the next light.
Second traffic light – Riceboy begins a futile attempt at verbally taunting me, while trying to make his car bounce, nearing blowing the sewing machine of an engine in the process. As there is usually more than one male occupant (and occasionally one female who looks like she’d rather be somewhere else), I ask which one of them is the dominant queer, or do they take turns being the sultry bitch. I’ll then ask the female if she would like to go have a drink with me (this pisses off the males, usually under 21). They tear off again, performing a sorry excuse for a burnout and barely maintaining control.
Third traffic light – Riceboy now thinks he can kick my ass. I advise him that I have taken shits bigger than him, and as the light turns green, I floor it and start swerving at him while screaming “ALLAH IS GREAT!!!” They usually lose interest at this point.
Some of them try to race me on my Harley, but I just ignore them. That’s like making fun of retarded people.
Any thoughts?
These people take imported average performance cars (mostly Japanese, Honda Civic and Accords being most popular) and invest a lot of money trying to make the car look /sound like a drag racer (ex: lots of stickers, racing stripes, humongous spoilers, etc..)
Now, I’m a firm believer in the “whatever blows your skirt up” philosophy…but something REALLY needs to be done about this. They seem to think that now that their cars look like drag racers, they really ARE drag racers, and it’s very embarrassing. They boast of Nitrous Oxide injection kits (guaranteed to burn through the pistons in under 1000 miles), an exhaust tip which resembles a chromed coffee can that (supposedly) adds 5-20 horsepower, a spoiler to increase drag coefficients almost the size of a DC-9 horizontal stabilizer/empennage, tires that stick out a foot from the car body and openly brag about turning a 17 second quarter mile. I’ve seen shopping carts rolling thru parking lots faster than that. Anything slower than 14 seconds is mediocre. I still have yet to meet one of these boneheads who has any clue at all what drag coefficient is.
This is kind of like duct taping a butane powered potato launcher to the front of a lawn tractor and calling it a tank.
At least once a week, I am confronted at a traffic light by some dumbass driving what looks to be an oversized baby stroller with a shitty paint job and sounds like a gas powered food processor, wanting to drag race me in my beat up Ford Taurus by revving his engine and trying to verbally taunt me (this is equivalent to challenging the residents of a nursing home to an arm wrestling tournament and calling all who decline “pussies” in hopes of impressing your girlfriend). I perform the “3 light” countermeasure:
First traffic light – Riceboy pulls up next to me, revs engine and waits for eye contact. I look at him, then look over his car quizzically, shake my head and laugh, then turn my attention back to the road as if he wasn’t even there. He tears off when the light turns green, I take my time to the next light.
Second traffic light – Riceboy begins a futile attempt at verbally taunting me, while trying to make his car bounce, nearing blowing the sewing machine of an engine in the process. As there is usually more than one male occupant (and occasionally one female who looks like she’d rather be somewhere else), I ask which one of them is the dominant queer, or do they take turns being the sultry bitch. I’ll then ask the female if she would like to go have a drink with me (this pisses off the males, usually under 21). They tear off again, performing a sorry excuse for a burnout and barely maintaining control.
Third traffic light – Riceboy now thinks he can kick my ass. I advise him that I have taken shits bigger than him, and as the light turns green, I floor it and start swerving at him while screaming “ALLAH IS GREAT!!!” They usually lose interest at this point.
Some of them try to race me on my Harley, but I just ignore them. That’s like making fun of retarded people.
Any thoughts?
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Comments
They drive around in their vauxhall Novas and think that because they have added alloy wheels and a bigger exhaust they can beat me in a race. Despite the fact that I have a newer, more powerful car lol.
All the money they've spent doing their cars up, they could actually buy a new one.
we all them rude boys where i'm from. they can be found driving up and down the highstreet all weekend listening to jungle or hard house.
what makes me laugh is that they lower the suspension so much that whenever they go over speed bumps they always scrape their wonderfully stupid body kits.
oooo, and what makes them think lime green is a great colour for a car?!
That would be so cool!
Dear God...you've got me thinking about this. It would be cool!!! Imagine this:
A "mechanized" version of "Paintball", where you drive lawn tractors or quad runners armed with a fixed mounted potato launcher that fires red dye infused potatoes to mark direct hits. You'd have to have a plexiglass cage around you, though ( a direct hit from a potato would probably ruin your day).
I'm gonna talk to some friends about this..... the possibilities!!!:D
yeah...that would be cool...
So because my sis/her bf drives a subaru impreza it means she/he is a stupid dumb ass boy/girl racer bc he does say 120mph down the A12 over taking all other cars or racing other cars?
Yes, yes and yes.
Yah that sounds pretty fucking stupid to me.
That doesn't quite make sense rudey...
anyone doing 120mph down an a-road is not safe. let's hope he loses the ability to drive very soon.
I doubt he will it isnt like its all the time he likes the speed...
he only doesa it on a openish road...if theres an empty lane...he doesnt surve in and outa cars...
FFS. The guy is not safe he is lucky. If he was a safe driver, he wouldn't do speeds unsuitable for those roads.
Why is it stupid?! Because even IF there were no possibility of anyone else being involved if something went wrong, last year there were 14,771 RTA`s in this country which were either serious or fatal, and which were single vehicle accidents not involving pedestrians. In other words, these drivers (or their cars) just fucked up all by themselves without anyone else being involved at all. I dare say they thought it couldn`t happen to them either.
Also, usually has his 15 year old girl friend in the passenger seat & the local place for them to meet is McDonalds drive-thru
.:Crispy:.
so true!!
Extremely fucking stupid.
And stupid people, due to the fact that they're in charge of something extremely dangerous, shouldn't be allowed to drive.
I'm not talking intellectually here, by stupid I mean ****ish boy racers like those that drive at 50, 60mph + in the 30 limit between me and the uni.
Driving 120mph is not stupid in itself, but in the wrong conditions, with the wrong driver, it's very stupid and dangerous.
It sounds like they're driving the right car for the job...but obviously neither of them are the right person and the conditions aren't exactly ideal, are they? :rolleyes:
For fucks sake, if you wanna race, go to a fucking race track.
sp is Warwick
Well, that's great that she did.
Maybe she should do it more often rather than using A roads which are also used by people not interested in racing.
meh k...
in the uk they have fiestas and novas (equivalent to the Ford Festiva in the US), and an unmodded honda civic beat them any day.
I dont see the point of putting all these body kits on that weigh down the car making it slower, and putting novely oversized spoilers which are only for show, increases drag slowing the car down and would only be affective at 200mph +. Yet does nothing to the engine because of insurance (well, the ones that have insurance).
And about doing 120 safely in an impretza, most normal road tyres arent designed for that speed, and noone will be able to control a car if the tyre blows out at 120, even if the tyre is designed you could run over something which punctures it, they be in a lot of trouble then.
I've got a couple of friends who are boy racers. It never appealed to me. But one of the things they have in their cars which you didn't mention at the begining was a large dog stand - I mean - sub woofer - in the back of their car with deafening club music shooting out of their speakers
My dad's a boy racer, but he says he does it properly. He has a G-reg Volvo Estate with a turbo-charger built in. It's great fun to see the look on boy racer's faces when they tail-gate us around a roundabout and then can't see us for dust afterwards
I don't have a car - I don't really like them. I believe they've got twice as many wheels as they need. I have a motorbike.
I've always wanted to boy racer-afise my motorbike:
* neon lights (fairy lights unter the petrol tank)
* spoiler (a post-it note stuck on the back of my seat)
* lowered suspention (carrying around a couple of bricks to add wieght)
* sub woofer (dog paws placed on the back seat)
* body kit (a cardboard box around my bike wich gets knocked off by speed bumps)
* tinted windows (painting my visor black)
* baseball cap (screw it onto the helmet)
* loud noise fro the exhause pipe (attach it with a nail)
...I could go on and on about it
Excellent.
Swedish turbocharged cars.
They are already good out of the box. They don't need lots of G's thrown at then to make them at-least remotely good.
But suppose i'm a bit Pug biased
.:Crispy:.
last week my housemate's best friend was driving down a deserted road at stupid speeds, flipped his car and died.
so um, yeah. not the best idea they've ever had.
Not having a dig just agreeing with you
I take it you want a 206cc then:cool:
You got pm by the way
.:Crispy:.
well, that's one theory
I have one of those 206 Gti's.... btw :cool: