Sunday Evening Support Thread (11/06)

AislingDM

Heya guys! I’m back with another Sunday support thread

How are you all ?

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Millie2787

Hi

Currently shitting bricks we’ve got really bad thunder and lighting

AislingDM

Heya @Past User !! Very glad to see you as well apologies for being gone for a while very happy to see you online

Oh sounds dreadful @Millie2787 ! Thunder and lightning can acc be so terrifying does it scare you x

Millie2787

I hate it , my autism hates it

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Millie2787

Been a week already since we lost Louie my heart still aches so much

AislingDM

Makes complete sense @Millie2787 ! I mean such awfully loud noise is horrid for anyone but it can be a proper sensory overload right ? Is there anything that makes you feel a bit safer during thunderstorms?


I’m doing well thank you @Past User sounds rubbish why only “meh”?

AislingDM

Completely @Millie2787 its beyond painful to go through that kind of grief how are you managing to process it all?

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Millie2787

Not really sure how I am . Dottie came for a sleep over with me at uni on Friday night and we’re back at home now. She doesn’t seem to bothered by it anymore, but he’s left a massive whole in my heart and I still feel guilty that I had to make the decision to send him over the rainbow bridge

TheNightmare

Yo. Good to see this is on

AislingDM

Sunburn is the actual worst - I’ve managed to get it like a million times since the sun first came out @Past User oh gosh no, what happened? Coping with it all at once sounds exhausting half the time when that happens every emotion just blurs into one - hence the “meh”

Of course @Millie2787 I honestly can’t even imagine it - the burden that weighs on you is immense because even when you have to make that choice for him, it does leave you with a sense of guilt (even though you’re ofc not to blame). X

TheNightmare

I've been struggling @AislingDM

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Millie2787

He was really poorly and all the tests they wanted to do was mounting up to over £5000+ and there was little guarantee that he would make it through the night, so I know it’s the best thing. Just has some people make me feel guilty for choosing that option… but how quick he went on such little medication just showed how critical he really was

AislingDM

That sounds terrible @FordRanger , what’s been going on?

Completely @Past User , it really is like once life becomes this overwhelming, what on earth are you meant to do to feel okay anymore ? It’s no wonder it leaves you in such a dark place is there anything you’ve managed to enjoy lately? Even something tiny ?

No, you’re so right @Millie2787 , there’s a certain point in everyone’s life (including our pets) where you are so unwell that each day is immensely painful. And for some, making the choice to end that suffering for their pets is the kindest act that can be done, even though it is an indescribable pain to do it xx

Millie2787

They think he had something wrong with his spleen that was possibly causing internal bleeding. He wasn’t himself and was struggling to breathe so it wasn’t fair on him to keep him here when he was obviously so unwell

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TheNightmare

AislingDM wrote: »

That sounds terrible @FordRanger , what’s been going on?

TheNightmare

@AislingDM I have been struggling what to do from here in life like being unemployed sucks but 9 to 5 life is worse and people say that do hobbies etc outside work but if I'm working most of my days when am going to be in the mood. Sunday night like now I won't be in the mood because of work the next day, Friday I'll be tired from everything and Saturday maybe but that's my only day. Like life seems depressing just work 9 to 5 minimum most of your life in a job you don't like. Like part time probably isn't enough to make a living long term, maybe when living at home but you have to move out of your parents house eventually so 9 to 5 is minimum for a lot of people just to pay bills and put food on the table. Life seems depressing

AislingDM

Well that’s exactly it @Millie2787 , when you see someone you love suffering in that kind of way it is just impossible to stand there and do nothing, especially when animals can’t make a choice for themselves to explain that they can’t keep going like this. Feeling like people are judging you for doing what was right for him is beyond unfair I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with all to this after such an immense loss x

Yes of course @Past User anything that might help you to feel even the smallest bit happier, I want you to want to be here xx

Couldn’t agree more @FordRanger , there is something very uniquely depressing and disheartening about considering the idea that you’ll be stuck in a career that you hate just to barely afford to exist and that shows how often money influences the careers we seek out which means our passions can’t even be fulfilled this is why I really do encourage all of my friends to use any time they have to try their hand at loads of different jobs / volunteering in different fields. Volunteering is especially good because there are fewer commitments so if you didn’t enjoy volunteering at a hospital, say, you can leave having crossed one more career off of your list xx

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TheNightmare

AislingDM wrote: »

Well that’s exactly it @Millie2787 , when you see someone you love suffering in that kind of way it is just impossible to stand there and do nothing, especially when animals can’t make a choice for themselves to explain that they can’t keep going like this. Feeling like people are judging you for doing what was right for him is beyond unfair I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with all to this after such an immense loss x

Yes of course @Past User anything that might help you to feel even the smallest bit happier, I want you to want to be here xx

Couldn’t agree more @FordRanger , there is something very uniquely depressing and disheartening about considering the idea that you’ll be stuck in a career that you hate just to barely afford to exist and that shows how often money influences the careers we seek out which means our passions can’t even be fulfilled this is why I really do encourage all of my friends to use any time they have to try their hand at loads of different jobs / volunteering in different fields. Volunteering is especially good because there are fewer commitments so if you didn’t enjoy volunteering at a hospital, say, you can leave having crossed one more career off of your list xx

@AislingDM yh I did volunteering for a garage the other week it was ok but a lot of work for no money. You need money to make a living too so I don't know what to do. Hopefully something will come up.

AislingDM

Of course @Past User truly I honestly wonder sometimes how tiring it must be for you to deal with so much in such a short life thus far, it’s no wonder you’re left being so frustrated and tired! I really was so grateful to read your other thread though, I think creative writing counselling is such an important way to encourage people to discuss their emotions in a constructive and safe way! I reckon you’d be amazing at it - what led you to want to do it?

That’s exactly it, right @FordRanger ? Like even when you find something you love, you can be stuck on minimum wage or a job with hardly any annual leave or any number of other depressing parts of being employed. It’s a particularly dreadful situation for young people coming into the workforce atm I know you’re interested in cars, are you interested in doing apprenticeships at some of the ‘big companies’ xx

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TheNightmare

@AislingDM I was thinking of buying a cheap car to do up and sell for profit but storage is an issue like my mum doesn't let me have my own car on the drive cars it's cracking the flags apparently so it kind of puts that idea to bed.

She's got a lot of rules lately, I can't go out unless its with friends she's familiar with, no takeaways and we have to eat what she makes. My family don't believe in depression etc too, they said if someone was give a 1 million or a few mil then it would cure it.

My opinion on my families views on depression, I kind of partly agree with them because like 1 million would most likely cure all of my issues atm and maybe some other people's too but I dont know other people's circumstances tbf. I don't think they're fully wrong, but people have pstd and stuff like that but I dont think my famliy mean that. I think depression is real though.

AislingDM

Yes please to both @Past User !! I don’t think I’ve spotted any of your poetry but I’m such a poetry lover truly it makes me so happy, like when you hear really profound lyrics to a song

Oh that’s so frustrating @FordRanger especially because it’s such a cool idea it seems like aside from money hindering your career goals, your mum is kind of getting in the way too. Living in quite a constrained way sounds so defeating because any attempts at being more independent or making your own choices (even for dinner) are quashed. Have you tried to push her boundaries at all ? (No stress if not, I know it can be really challenging to do). I think you make such an interesting point about depression because obv a lot of people are depressed because of their material circumstances (like money) or a lack of money worsens their existing depression, but obviously there will be rich people who are depressed too. I think it can’t be as simple as “money” because then all rich people would never struggle with their mental health as they do xxx

TheNightmare

AislingDM wrote: »

Yes please to both @Past User !! I don’t think I’ve spotted any of your poetry but I’m such a poetry lover truly it makes me so happy, like when you hear really profound lyrics to a song

Oh that’s so frustrating @FordRanger especially because it’s such a cool idea it seems like aside from money hindering your career goals, your mum is kind of getting in the way too. Living in quite a constrained way sounds so defeating because any attempts at being more independent or making your own choices (even for dinner) are quashed. Have you tried to push her boundaries at all ? (No stress if not, I know it can be really challenging to do). I think you make such an interesting point about depression because obv a lot of people are depressed because of their material circumstances (like money) or a lack of money worsens their existing depression, but obviously there will be rich people who are depressed too. I think it can’t be as simple as “money” because then all rich people would never struggle with their mental health as they do xxx

@AislingDM yh true but I guess I could lose money too. Ive not pushed boundaries. Tbh like ive said a lot its her house her rules unfortunately. Like on Monday i went will my dad to went to pick her up from work then he dropped us off at home and went to go pick up my sister from a music lesson and my brother didn't know so he asked where they are then my mum said "they have gone to get some chips" And I thought we were going to have a nice takeaway but my mum was just joking then we just ended up having the usual food we have like rice with prawns like I was going to order a takeaway but there's no way I'd be allowed one. I tried to order one and she snatched my phone off me then I was on just eat website she went on the job vacancies tab and then gave my phone back.

It was my fault for trying to order food when sh made it clear she was making it like I think its disrespectful since im living under her roof she pays the bills etc.

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AislingDM

Well that’s the tough thing isn’t it, when you live at home there is this very difficult line to walk between respect and doing what your parents want/deserve whilst also being your own person and fulfilling your own wants and needs. Of course I’m sure eating dinner with family can be a lovely and critical time to catch-up with one another, but wanting a cheeky domino’s every now and then shouldn’t necessarily be an issue I suppose? You really do deserve to be able to be yourself even if it’s not officially “your house” @FordRanger xx