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So so low

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  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Thank you. Bit i cant take this anymore. Its like a few mins of feelin okay after ive been sick (which is now). Then its feeling for ages which is awfulllllllll and then it is being sick which isss awfulllllllll because ive not eaten anything to throw up if make sense so jut hurting my stomach so bad. I cant take it. My throat hurts so bad. I just want to go home be in bed and not being sick. I scared im keeping everyone. Awake with my sick


    and now on that time of writing this i can feel the sickness coming agaim 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭literally awfulbcant even cope. Just want to stop being sick😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😂
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    I think I'm dying
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 1,646 Extreme Poster
    Hey, the nausea and vomiting should subside when enough of the chemicals in your body have been down and flushed with the IV stuff.
     
    Why what's up? 

    Quick question, are you using your data or have you managed to connect to the WiFi? 

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    I think the sickness is going now. I don't want to speak too soon.  But i am lying down and haven't moved for awhile so don't want to move. I feel like death. I am using the hospital wifi now
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Past UserPast User Posts: 1,997 Extreme Poster
    Feel well @Shaunie ❤️ . I’m sure that you’re in good hands at the hospital. I’m really glad to hear that the sickness is going. Hopefully be back on your feet in no time 🤗 ❤️
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Thank you :) i have finally stopped being sick. Gunna ask if they can let me home now. But obviously in the morning as 4am
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    At one point i thought i was in a horrible hospital where they was trying to kill me off  like in one of those horror films. And i thought maybe thats why corona exists too. Just trying to kill everyone. But no i feel a lot better now ahaha. 
    Shame that they wasn't though
    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Wtf just had corona virus test. Ill going home soon whats the point in that 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    Shaunie said:
    Thank you :) i have finally stopped being sick. Gunna ask if they can let me home now. But obviously in the morning as 4am
    Or not....  the health care assistants said after first drip i might be ablev to go home. But obvs not.  Then says after second drip 4 hour drip i could go home and blood tests. Me thinking Blood tests to see i can go home. But no they just put a 16 hour drip in me. Why say it for now I'm scared this one is going to make me sick. So i think ain't leaving til atleast 10pm tomorrow 😭😭. I did get told by the doctor at the start will be 1 hour 4 hour then 16 hours but still they shouldnt start contradicting it making me thinking i can go home in the morning when i obviously can't. I have got anti sickness on prescribe now but still don't think that helped


    ive had this done before but yeah thought it might work differently now & before i was never this sick
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    I miss teddy lol. I miss him even if i go to the shops for a few minutes😂
    my blood tests seem okay atm so think i defo will leave at like 11 but my ecg wasn good but going to repeat it and maybe will need a 24 hour ecg
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    I am getting really tempted to leave. I dont think they would stop ne
     edit. They did
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Can not stop crying now. I want to die 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Fruit loop Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Sending loads of hugs Shaunie 💖

    What's on your mind? X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 21 Boards Initiate
    @Shaunie I hope you start to feel better soon, be as honest as you can with the nurses and they'll be able to help and support you so much better.  Sending hugs <3
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    I will try to explain in a few ho ur s can barely see out of my eyes cause theyre very swollen
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Fruit loop Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    That's understandable Shaunie just be kind to yourself take it easy x
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    Wtf the fuck

    @The Mix
    i just took forever to write my reply. Posted it then I edited over it and it has all been deleted because it said it needs approval. I wrote so much and i cba to explain again. 

    Fuckin hell everything is making me want to cry

     done this a few times now and then it sends randomly
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 9,051 Supreme Poster
    I reckon that’s the spam filter @Shaunie, it’s a bit strange seems to be happening to a few people.

    Sending hugs <3 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Thanks but why has it still not sent yet 😭 i had so much to say and so much i wrote😭😭😭😭 IM so so sad. Have no energy to send it. Please find it @The Mix
     really struggling so so bad
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Omg i edited it over again and it disappeared. Thank fuck i copied it just incase. I think i edit over things to much. Ill send it again
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    Ok ill just fucking write it again then 😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒😒if similar posts comes up randomly later. Just ignore it. 

    I am struggling sooo sooo bad. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭so last night my drip finished at like 11 pm. So i wanted to go but said i cant cause still need my blod tests so can in morning. But i was like na no way im staying take forever to give me my results of bloods. So i jist left but they did take my blood before i left

    so i was looking forward to just coming home and back to my own bed with decent sleep nd stuff and just freash air and not being sick. I come home my family barely say two words to me which was upsetting they could of atleast pretended to care like ask me how i was. I was looking forward to my ice lollies but no my sister ate them. (I know sounds small but you know when everything is building up) why would she jusy do that when i am in hosital. I would never do that. I would buy her a treat or something not steal her stuff. I wanted something refreashing so i was pissed off. I go into my room and just see what i used to harm myself. They went into my room t give me my stuff at hospital EG my face wipes. So i was literally just thinking wow they want me to kill myself. What was left was for a reason tho. But they didnt know that. They knew it was what i used. But if was the other type i so would of 100% just done it all over again. Why the fuck would they leave it there. Its like they invited me to kill myself. 
    So that was it. I was sooo sooo upset that no ones gave a shit about me. I could not stop crying from 11:30 til 2 am. Like i could barely breath i just wanted to kill myself so bad. I just realised more and more about why i ddi it in the first place. Nothing was going to change. And no one gives a fuck about it

    got phone call this morning to tell me to go back to the hospital for blood tests. Thought i would give me bloods then go but hate to stay and i was getting so pissed off again. But when my blood tests can back them said my levels are basically nearly back to normal now. But gave me pottasium supplements and meds to settle my stomach. And supoose to get an ECG 24 one at some point cause my ecg hasnt been good since i did what i did

    i sent an email to my gp at 6 am saying how ive tried to kill myself twice close together and have been offered 0 supoort & i wrote a lot of suicidal stuff that i will not copy. I made it clear for them to not ring me unless they was going to offer support or meds to knock me out. Ring me and says "hi how can i help". I was pissed off. Put the phone down and then enailed them "I said dont bother ringing me if not going to help me. No one gives a fuck so thanks. Just rang me saying "how can i help" like i havent already explained how i feel so i hanged up. If not going to offer supoort or meds to knock me out then dont bother" plus a lot more suicidal shitt. 

    They havent bothered trying to ring me back or reply to my email and dont think they will. I told them atleast if i kill myself they could take the next person seriously. 

    Ive basically only spoke to the shitty crisis team about how i feel and we know how dismissive the crisis team are. They offered me nothing. No plan or anything. Felt like just been treated like not a person just like shit and a robot 

    The only person who ive seen tbis whole time who has generuily seemed to care and interest to how i feel was the person i saw this morning. Bless her she was really nice and kept telling me to keep pestering my gp or find any mental health supoort i can  And to not give up. Made me want to cry there and then 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭


    ive had a nap since been back but keep feeling like i want to cry but cant cause my family walking around

    i feel really light headed and sick but might be from the heat

    im literally so fucking fed up of this life now. Everyday is the same fucking shit and nothing is ever going to change. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭i just wasnt  IT to stop 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i am safe rn just going to sleep today but i can not even explain how awful i feel 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
    Post edited by TheMix on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    I an crying now but i couldnt literally help it 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. If my family come into my room just going to have cover my face pretending I'm asleep
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Please someone speak to me. Its hurting my throat trying not to cry tbis much but i am still crying 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. I don’t know how im going to cope anymore😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Just had phone call from discharge planning team. Said how are you feeling. I said very suicidal. She couldnt barely understand what i was saying cause am crying lol. She said oh no. Can i speak to your dad. I said no and she was just like oh no hopefully you dont harm yourself and i was like yeah. Then she was like okay thank you bye 😂😭😭😭😭😭
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    Oh shit. She just rang me back saying i need you to ring 111 i said no its okay they cant help she said oh its either that or ill ring the police. Now theyre ringing my dad. I can hear them. I didnt say i have plans. I just said im still suicidal which is obvious. I need help not the police coming or a quick chat over the phone
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Does anyone care? 😓 

    i rang 111 cause didnt have much of a chioce. She said she will ring me back in 30 mins but phone call took longer than 30 mins so dk if she will. 111 just asked me a lot of questions and offered me to go to the mind sancutry for a few hours. I said no. Cause for one i wouldnt know how to get there and two i dont have any energy. She said i am on BPD exemplar referall. I don’t know what exemplar means and i don’t know why they keep saying that when my letter just basically said it doesnt exist rn caude of corona

    im feeling really sick now and massive headache🤢
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,202 Part of The Furniture
    I’m so sorry your still finding things so difficult shaunie :( I don’t have much to offer today but have a photo of Louie sending you lots of positive vibes 

    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
  • Ed_Ed_ Moderator Posts: 1,551 Extreme Poster
    Hey Shaunie,

    First up, sending all the hugs your way, this sounds like an incredibly raw and rough time for you. It may not seem like it, but you are doing incredibly well to keep advocating for what you need both in terms of the changes to how you are feeling, but also the support you need to help you with this. I can hear how tired you feel with this all, however this resilience and strength is also important to reflect on. 

    It can be difficult to know what others think, and so try not to read too much into how your family are seeming with all this. It's possible that they feel a little unsure what to do, and so there could be some interesting ways to try and nudge them in a more helpful direction. For example, do you think there could be a way where you could write them a letter or find a way to communicate how you would like them to be at times when you are in crisis? Equally, you could send them in the direction of some resources that may give them pointers of what they can do to be more proactive, such as what Papyrus have: https://papyrus-uk.org/help-advice-resources/ - I do realise though, this all takes a lot of energy and strength to be able to do this with people who don't always get things right.

    On the post front, we are looking into what happened. @independent_ was right, the spam filter picked up your original post, and seemed to pick up your follow up after you edited it. We are not 100% sure why this happened, however we can restore previous posts if that is helpful. One thing you mentioned in your original post that you didn't in your re-write was the following (hope you don't mind me posting it, let me know if you'd prefer us to take it down. 

    in hospital i was literaly thinking to myself. I am never going to hurt myself or try this again. 

    I would be really interested to explore this a little more, what in particular was driving and motivating these feelings? Is there a way that we can come up with a plan that really helps you feel confident moving closer towards this place, where you feel fully safe and not in a place where you have thoughts of hurting yourself again? This may feel like a long way away, or something impossible to imagine right now, but if we can break it down into small goals and have lots of little things that can help you to distract yourself when things feel too much, it is possible to take steps closer to this possibility. So in that mind, perhaps you can have a think about some of the following questions - also, it may be interesting to hear how others in the community would answer these questions too, as there could be some awesome ideas to borrow:

    Preparing for crisis
    1. What are the early warning signs you might notice when you feel yourself heading towards a crisis? 
    2. When things feel too much, what are 3 things that you can do to try and keep yourself safe? 
    3. What ways can you make sure that you are able to remind yourself of these things when you feel unsafe? (could be some interesting creative ways that you could do this!)
    4. Who do you think would be best/ who do you feel comfortable making aware of when you're feeling that way or you notice some of those signs?

    Future planning
    1. when you're feeling at your most positive what things do you think about?
    2. What things in your life, big or small, make you feel hopeful or positive about the future?
    3. What things could change, again big or small, that will help you to feel more in control of your situation? 
    4. Are their changes you can make to your room, or a place you regularly go to, to help make it feel like a calming or safe space when you need it?
    Take your time with these, and there is no rush to answer all straight away, perhaps pick out the ones that you feel most able to focus on right now :3

    Finally, just adding in some places to talk both in terms of crisis options, but also to look for advocacy to help with pushing for the support and treatment you are looking for right now:

    999: If you ever feel in immediate risk, call 999 for emergency support
    Crisis messenger: Text TheMix to 85258 to speak to a trained crisis volunteer
    Samaritans: you can call them at any time on 116 123 to talk to someone about anything going on for you
    Papyrus - have a helpline for those feeling suicidal on 0800 068 41 41 - open 9am-10pm weekdays and 2-10pm on weekends
    MayTree - usually they provide a sanctuary for those feeling suicidal, but because of COVID they are currently providing telephone and email support: https://www.maytree.org.uk/

    Advocacy services
    Mind can help you find people to advocate on your behalf, this may help reduce the amount of energy you have to focus on seeking the support and treatment you are after: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/advocacy/finding-an-advocate/

    Hope this is helpful Shaunie, there are lots of people in the community that care about you and we are all here for you <3

    Ed
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    edited June 2020
    Thank you @Millie2787
    louie is looking cute as ever!


    thank you @Ed_
    its just weird because i have done this similar thing before and had to stay in hospital it was years ago but they acted the exact oppsite lasst time. 

    And yeah Ed. When i was in hospital i didnt want to do it because omg it was awful. I was sick like 15 times and i was just so agitated to be there. But now just feeling i deserve that. I don’t know if could get back into thinking to never do it again, i mean it was terrible but

    They kept asking me about why sometimes i act and sometimes i dont if i always feel suicidal and i dont have any idea the reason. 

    But i havent read those questiony atm but will do as could be helpful

    Im still feeling sick. The discharge person did ring me again to check i rang them. I told her i am ferling really sick again and told me to ring 999 if it doesnt improve but i think it might before the heat plus crying too much and think i need to force myself to eat because of appitate and feeling sick and couldnt bring myself to eat much at all
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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