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Being a Burden

ElizabethElizabeth Posts: 93 Budding Regular
How do you know is someone wants to talk to you? I just feel like I annoy everyone and bother them, I'm a burden and just waste peoples time.

Comments

  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    I don't really know how to know if someone wants to talk to you either. Sorry about that. I have one thing to say though- I'm the only burden and time waster on here.
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    I get the same sort of feeling Eli. I can tell you that you're not a burden at all! It must be horrible to feel like you annoy and bother everyone. You give off a really nice vibe to me and I know for a fact that you're valuable and don't waste people's time <3
  • ElizabethElizabeth Posts: 93 Budding Regular
    @Kasa2103, you don’t seem like a burden or time waster to me ❤️

    @Kathleen07 thanks

    I just feel so empty like no one even cares anymore 
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    Thank you but I am a burden and time waster. Don't know why I bother trying to get support anywhere. 
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • StephanieStephanie Moderator Posts: 1,083 Wise Owl
    Hey @Eli444

    Just wanted to check in and see how you are doing? We are here for you, and care about you :heart:

    Sorry to hear you feel like your a burden, you can always talk to us here, you aren't wasting our time :heart:

    Do you want to talk more about anything?

    Sending hugs :smile:


                                   "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if only one remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 

    "Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"

    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Youre not a burden <3

    youre worthy of peoples times. 
    Like sometimes we all like stress people out of something like our family or something but thats cause youre important and worthy of the time 
    no ones a burden cause all deserve what ever youre seeking 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    You're not a burden, and not wasting anyone's time! I honestly find it a pleasure talking to you, I know everyone can feel like this sometimes and some people may not want to talk, but they don't deserve your time 💖
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • ElizabethElizabeth Posts: 93 Budding Regular
    edited January 2020
    Thanks @Stephanie

    It's so complicated, I just waste their time so I stop talking to them, but then I feel so empty and alone like no one care. I hurt myself to stop the pain of being numb, but then they get upset and ask why I didn't phone them (they think they can help, but there is nothing they could have done). I just don't want to bother them. They are upset with me, and it's just making everything worse. I always ruin everything, I don't deserve their support, especially cause of everything I've done to upset them.  :/
  • PoppyBPoppyB Posts: 228 Trailblazer
    Hey @Eli444 you've made a great step by talking about your feelings on the boards :)

    Firstly I want to just echo what everyone else has said about you not being a burden and you are not wasting anyone's time. Everyone has lows that they need help coming out of, and you are no exception. From reading your posts you seem very empathetic and easy to talk to - we are all here to listen to you and support you in whatever way we can <3

    Sorry to hear that people have not been supportive when you say that you have hurt yourself. How would you feel about telling them that their responses are making you feel worse? That may help to start a conversation around what support you need from them in those moments and they will know for the future.   

    Also, it can sometimes help to reverse the situation, for example, if one of your friends reached out to you, would you think that they were wasting your time? 

    I have popped a few resources down under the spoiler if you feel you may need any further help at any point:
    Distractions from self harm by Mind
    National Self Harm Network
    The Mix free confidential helpline  0808 808 4994
    Samaritans free helpline 116 123 available 24/7



  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 1,826 Extreme Poster
    Hey :)

    Sorry to hear that's how you feel. I think that if someone doesn't want to spend time with you or thinks you're a burden, they'll let you know. Until then, you're effectively deciding that you're a burden for them without them knowing, so it comes across as if you don't want to be friends with them. Hold your loved ones close, don't push them away - it's hard to make good friends, but easy to break them x

    Much love <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Gemma1Gemma1 Posts: 123 The Mix Convert
    Hey @Eli444

    I'm sorry to hear you feel like a burden to people and don't feel like you deserve the support, but everyone deserves to feel supported and listened to. We're all here and support you. 

    It's difficult when people get upset if you don't come to them with your problems or when you're hurting, especially when you feel that you're just trying not to burden them. We're all here for you though and you took a big step reaching out here and you're never a burden here no matter how you're feeling. 

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