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Shaunie wrote: »
Thank you very much @Mirabelle 💜.
Over texts we have arranged to meet up today at 1:30. And now am panicking, I don’t even know what she looks like. can be an awkward person as it is. Let alone when meeting someone new. Gunna be so awkward and embarrassing.
Ahah Kite flying sounds better than the plans i have this week aha
Shaunie wrote: »
Was so so anxious so we went in car instead.
Tbh it didn’t go great. I lost most of the hope I thought I didn’t have
She told me she wasn’t putting me off but Was quite negative but I guess she was just honest
She said it could take 1-2 years for investigation and that it can put someone’s life on hold the whole time and even then they’re v disheartened by it all
Well may aswell just kill my self now.
Basically all I heard was ‘people get away with sexual abuse all the time’. She probably didn’t want me to get disheartened and I don’t know at the time I was thinking maybe I could find courage to do the video statement.
But now I am think I should find the corauge to kil myself
There isn’t any hope and the world isn’t safe
Mike wrote: »
Well done, [USER="96903"]Shaunie[/USER]! It's commendable that you accepted this meeting, even if you left with some conflicting thoughts about everything moving forward. These things are never easy, and no matter how it unfolded, it was a brave thing to do and shows a drive to seek help. :yes:
I wonder if you not mentioning counselling made her think that you hadn't thought about it, and therefore made her think it was a good suggestion? Not sure, but that's what came into my head reading your post.
Reporting what happened will always be your decision, even if people advise against it. ISVAs and other people in these sorts of positions probably get quite a good sense of what incidents will lead to cases being built and convictions happening, and whether it's 'worth' the stress and ordeal that reporting something can bring. But if there is value in reporting it for you, then that's a reason to report it in itself. Some people find it brings them some closure, for example.
I guess, maybe it's worth thinking - how would you feel if you went through the process of reporting it, and then it didn't result in anything happening? And equally, what if they ended up in prison? Getting a feel of the possible outcomes can be a useful thought exercise.
Well done again for today, and keep in mind that listening services like Samaritans are always out there if you find yourself fighting suicidal thoughts. Keep us updated on how you're feeling about everything. *hug* Are there any plans for you to meet up with her again?
Aw I sent message to my ISVA as she wanted an update on the urgent referral. I told her that they refused. She sent a lovely message back- told me not to give up and that she will see me regularly and will not leave me without support. She seems so empathetic towards me and She said she’s not at work but has the phone and that I can ring her as she is free for an hour. Like that is so lovely. And that she is still going to speak with someone from that service. But atm she’s at home, not even at work and said I could speak with her. Just People’s kindness makes me so much calmer.