Home Drink & Drugs
We've started our first discussion for our Christmas campaign which is focusing on religion or cultural beliefs that help you when you're feeling down. Some of the responses will be used anonymously on social media as a video. If you'd like to take part, head over to this thread.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

Worried about him...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
Heyya,

I'm slightly worried about this kid in some of my classes... he's just turned 12- in August... And he drinks a lot more than I do (and I drink quite abit) and he takes weed all the time, and he smokes too. I'm starting to get really worried about him, he had a bottle of jack daniels at school. Which he drank all of.... and at the weekend he was in the park smoking weed and drinking vodka. I want to help him, he's sort of one of my friends, but I don't really know how to helpo him without seeming pushy...
X
«1

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    it's tricky, maybe you could try and talk to him and see if he opens up. i'm a bit confused though, are you also 12 or a teaching assistant or what?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LaLaLa wrote: »
    Heyya,

    I'm slightly worried about this kid in some of my classes... he's just turned 12- in August... And he drinks a lot more than I do (and I drink quite abit) and he takes weed all the time, and he smokes too. I'm starting to get really worried about him, he had a bottle of jack daniels at school. Which he drank all of.... and at the weekend he was in the park smoking weed and drinking vodka. I want to help him, he's sort of one of my friends, but I don't really know how to helpo him without seeming pushy...
    X

    Oh dear.
    Not sure I can say much ...don't know how I'd handle it myself in other words.
    Kids that age should really not be smoking weed or doing any other mindbenders.But the alcohol is really scary.
    Thats what will screw him up big time ...mentally physicaly emotionaly.
    It might even be the death of him.
    A full bottle of whiskey would mean I pressume that it was dilluted with something cos a full bottle for a child ...I mean he aint going to be standing up for sure. he's going to be feeling very ill.
    I think this may be beyond your obviously good intentions.
    Call in the proffessional;'s?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hang on slow down ....I just checked your profile ...your twelve:no:
    How on earth do you think you can help him.
    You sound genuine and kind and concerned but ...you too drink a lot.
    That tells me that you'll probably be dead or disabled before your thirty.
    You kids have very short and miserable lives in front of you if you aren't careful.
    Someone should report you to the relevant authorities.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Would you be kind enough to answer a simple question for me?
    Where are your parents when your getting shit faced?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heyya,

    Well yea I am only 12- but the hospital know about my drinking, as does my mum. And I am getting help... But this lad is doing so much more than I do. I don't drink as much as I used to, and I am trying to stop, in fact I haven't had a drink since I was in hospital- and that was two weeks ago I think. But seriously- this lad needs HELP. I don't think the teahcers or doctors or who ever will help him. I don't want to intrude in his life like that... But I am worried for his safety. He gets paid for rolling his mums fags... and if I told a teacher he'd be put in care or something! And he doesn't need that... I've got friends in care and they all drink aswell.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Woah morrocan roll, she is ehre to get advice to help a friend. Stop being such a vampire! Help her out, not scare her off for fucks sake.

    Yes it's evident that both people here need help. And various people need to get involved. But there is nothing we can do, but give advice and support. So instead of sitting on your arse and verbally abusing someone who cam here for help, actually help?

    Anyway to the OP, i can't really suggest anything but talk to him maybe? Or talk to a teacher or guardian, they will be able to help maybe.
    A silly over the top response to me and then you have nothing to ffer anyway ...which is what I admitted to in my first post.
    I don't believe theres anyone here who can offer much more than ...call in the proffesionals ...and that seems to be happening already.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LaLaLa wrote: »
    Heyya,

    Well yea I am only 12- but the hospital know about my drinking, as does my mum. And I am getting help... But this lad is doing so much more than I do. I don't drink as much as I used to, and I am trying to stop, in fact I haven't had a drink since I was in hospital- and that was two weeks ago I think. But seriously- this lad needs HELP. I don't think the teahcers or doctors or who ever will help him. I don't want to intrude in his life like that... But I am worried for his safety. He gets paid for rolling his mums fags... and if I told a teacher he'd be put in care or something! And he doesn't need that... I've got friends in care and they all drink aswell.
    X
    You sound quite grown up for twelve.

    Why don't you think these people will be of any help?
    Do you mind me asking why you were in hospital?
    I've never had experience of kids of your age doing this I'm afraid and I've been involved in drugs for a very long time.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You sound quite grown up for twelve.

    Why don't you think these people will be of any help?
    Do you mind me asking why you were in hospital?
    I've never had experience of kids of your age doing this I'm afraid and I've been involved in drugs for a very long time.

    I was in hospital beause I tried to kill myself.... it's complicated.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    La, Have you got any older mates in Y11... 6th form that could maybe have a chat to him if you don't want older people getting involved?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LaLaLa wrote: »
    I was in hospital beause I tried to kill myself.... it's complicated.
    X

    It's very sad that at such a young age your life should already be very complicated.
    Is there anyone out there who you can trust ...in the adult world?
    You have any hopes and plans for the future ...even the very near future?
    A big problem with helping others ...even someone you obviously care for ...is you have to help yourself first else it can be a case of the blind leading the blind.
    If you could sort yourself out first ...you'd discover that all your experiences ...even and often especially ...the bad ones ...become tools that you can use to help someone else.
    Your experience becomes wisdom.
    Your experiences become remarkable tools.
    You become incredibly strong.

    And I know it aint easy.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thanx morrocan roll.... I know I should try and sort myself out, but I just don't want to. I've lived the same for so many years I just don't want to change... it's all become a part of me.

    But I know drinking, smoking and drug use are stupid at this age. The hospital have said to me that I'll have liver problems if I continue... so I guess I just want to stop other people doing the things I've done- before it's to late for them too.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LaLaLa wrote: »
    thanx morrocan roll.... I know I should try and sort myself out, but I just don't want to. I've lived the same for so many years I just don't want to change... it's all become a part of me.

    But I know drinking, smoking and drug use are stupid at this age. The hospital have said to me that I'll have liver problems if I continue... so I guess I just want to stop other people doing the things I've done- before it's to late for them too.
    X

    You are going to have ever growing problems chuck.
    I FAIL TO UNDERSTAND HOW YOU'VE GOTTEN YOURSELF IN THIS STATE OF MIND AT SUCH A TENDER AGE.
    yOU SHOULD HAVE A BIG LIFE IN FRONT OF YOU BUT YOU DON'T SEEM TO WANT THAT.
    i UNDERSTAND NOT WANTING TO GIVE PERSONAL INFORMATION BUT i CAN IMAGINE.
    dO YOU LIVE IN A ROUGH PART OF TOWN OR A VERY COMFORATBLE ONE?
    oops caps lock.

    Are there any adults in your life that you trust ...and I mean trust where they expect nothing back ...not even rolling their rollups for them?
    Tell me something good about your life.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You are going to have ever growing problems chuck.
    I FAIL TO UNDERSTAND HOW YOU'VE GOTTEN YOURSELF IN THIS STATE OF MIND AT SUCH A TENDER AGE.
    yOU SHOULD HAVE A BIG LIFE IN FRONT OF YOU BUT YOU DON'T SEEM TO WANT THAT.
    i UNDERSTAND NOT WANTING TO GIVE PERSONAL INFORMATION BUT i CAN IMAGINE.
    dO YOU LIVE IN A ROUGH PART OF TOWN OR A VERY COMFORATBLE ONE?
    oops caps lock.

    Are there any adults in your life that you trust ...and I mean trust where they expect nothing back ...not even rolling their rollups for them?
    Tell me something good about your life.

    Ermm my area is alright I guess... it's not the rough part of town. Something good about my life... umm I'm going to my uncles to watch football later. I guess that's alright :)

    I don't roll peoples fags for them, that's the lad in my class.... But there aren't really any adults I trust- theres this bloke whos a TA in my middle school but I don't see him much anymore. But no body knows everything about me- I think if they did they would all just leave me.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Woah morrocan roll, she is ehre to get advice to help a friend. Stop being such a vampire! Help her out, not scare her off for fucks sake.

    I think hes right though, she's 12 but she sounds like shes in her 20's, its not good.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    I think hes right though, she's 12 but she sounds like shes in her 20's, its not good.

    And in what way am I scaring her off FFS?
    Am I scaring you LaLa?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    I think hes right though, she's 12 but she sounds like shes in her 20's, its not good.

    I thanked Jordan for standing up for me there... I don't want any more arguments and when I stick up for myself arguments always happen cos I don't deal with things that well....

    I gotta add though- I have been drinking ect. for years, and I do know all the concequences, my dad is a substance missuse youth worker ((I think that's the title) and he's told me a million and one times what can happen if I do certain things. I would love to be an average 12 year old, but I've never lived that way, and I never will... And I know a lot of people my age and younger who do pretty much the same things I do. It's not good, and we are all growing up far too fast, but it's just how we are... I wouldn't know how to play mum's and dad's or whatever it is that people play now. I've never fitted in with my age group, and I do try to accept that fact- and I was starting to become more like my peers. But then I started year 8, which were I live is high school. And because I came from a pretty small shool, into this huge one, I've now found a whole load of people like me... and I kinda fit in. But none of us really want to fit in this group- but because we've all found other people like ourselves we are sort of accepting each other- and the older pupils at my school accept us too.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    And in what way am I scaring her off FFS?
    Am I scaring you LaLa?

    I dont think it was scaring her, its call being honest.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    I dont think it was scaring her, its call being honest.

    I'm being as honest as I know ...I'll step out of this one maybe.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm being as honest as I know ...I'll step out of this one maybe.

    Exactly. I dont think theres much more advice to give..
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    Exactly. I dont think theres much more advice to give..

    I knew coming back here was a bad idea!! Sorry everyone.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LaLaLa wrote: »
    I knew coming back here was a bad idea!! Sorry everyone.

    No its not that, its just that morrocan roll tried to give advice only to be told he was scaring you. :confused: I dont think you coming back is the problem :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    Exactly. I dont think theres much more advice to give..

    Thats really helpful innit.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    No its not that, its just that morrocan roll tried to give advice only to be told he was scaring you. :confused: I dont think you coming back is the problem :)

    So I'm the problem aye.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    No its not that, its just that morrocan roll tried to give advice only to be told he was scaring you. :confused: I dont think you coming back is the problem :)

    No body has actually listened to my side of that yet.... I was really happy Jordan said that cos I wouldn't have the guts to say it myself in fear of upsetting someone. I wouldn't say he scared me... more that I didn't find it as useful as maybe something else could of been.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    So I'm the problem aye.

    No, i just dont think you being told you were scaring her really helped. I think you where just trying to give some advice and be honest about it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    LaLaLa wrote: »
    No body has actually listened to my side of that yet.... I was really happy Jordan said that cos I wouldn't have the guts to say it myself in fear of upsetting someone. I wouldn't say he scared me... more that I didn't find it as useful as maybe something else could of been.
    X

    Well going back to your problem with your friend, i think maybe you should talk to him about what he is doing and maybe offer to come along with him to talk to someone who can really help him. He might be having problems at home.. But if he says no, thats all you can really do, just make sure he knows that you will always be there, if ever he needs to talk.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Okay. Let's say I am the problem, as it is a thread I started.
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Smartie wrote: »
    Well going back to your problem with your friend, i think maybe you should talk to him about what he is doing and maybe offer to come along with him to talk to someone who can really help him. He might be having problems at home.. But if he says no, thats all you can really do, just make sure he knows that you will always be there, if ever he needs to talk.

    :yes: I wasn't in lessons today but if I see him tommorow I'll remind him I'm there for him.

    And thank you all for your advice, I'm finding it pretty hard to deal with things at the moment. And having people listen really helps
    X
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm staying out of this one ...best of luck with things LaLa ...for you and your friend.
    All the best.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm staying out of this one ...best of luck with things LaLa ...for you and your friend.
    All the best.

    Thank you for your advice :)
    Xx
Sign In or Register to comment.