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He's lying to try and get you back so he can have you under his thumb again. Don't fall for it. Even if he does make that website it only shows what a low-life bastard he is. The police will help you, your mum will help you (I'm sure she knows that you've had sex...). Don't let him do this to you.
you have a choice:
Either go back to him and have a shit life until one of you kills the other or he dumps you because he's found someone more gullible than you, or get him out of your life - I'd recommend involving the police as part of that.
The website can be brought down. This would make me definately not go back not the opposite!
Vid would be yesterdays news very quickly.
Good job either way.
he cries in his dinner and says he would never do you unjust again, and then blackmails you again with videos and pictures?
hello? how many times does this need to be repeated?
Big strong and independant, don't let this vermin try and get his way back into your life.
just seems like silly games to me though!
don't fall into the trap, ive read your previous threads and you're definitely doing very well
I feels like i am back to square one! I'm in dispear! I went to his flat and managed to pursuade him i love him and i want him back, i CANNOT risk this website thing, what if the people at my new job see it?
I have been chatting to him tonight and i've told him i am discusted at him for threatening me and i also said that what he was going to do was against the law but he said nothing would happen as the person who made the paris hilton and pamala andserson vids never got in trouble. he also said that if he put a site up and i repeorted it to the police then he would just claim his phone had been stolen and somebody else must of put the vids and images up. he also said that he would of emailed the clip to everybody and the police could not delete it from their inboxes. he also said he would post it on as many sites as poss and i wouldnt know which ones until somebody pointed it out to me.
the situation now is we are annoyingly "back together" and i hate his guts, he has been sobbing his heart out down the phone to me but i am too scared to break up with him incase more threats come, he said that he lied about having the vid on his PC, the only thing he has is one image, which i am not too bothered about. even if this IS true and he dont have any videos then if i break up with him he will just find something else to threaten me with won't he?
I feel all my hard work has been undone and my dreams of a happy life shattered. im crying so hard, i honestly dont know what i have done to deserve this, i just want to be happy.
Go to the house viewings on Monday. Leave. Don't even tell him you're gone. Change your number - sim cards aren't expensive - and only give it to the people you can trust. He's lying to you to get you back under his thumb. DON'T LET HIM. He can't threaten you unless you feel threatened, and if he's got nothing on you then he has nothing to blackmail you with. What is the worst he can do to you? Really?
It's still not to late.
So YOU would be happy, as a 22 year old girl who is concious of what people think and of her body, to have a sex tape of you plastered all over the net?????? He still might have the video and be telling another lie and release it after i have left him. i dont know what to belive.
^^ this, get rid of him, this pathetic wee website can get taken down, but you CANNOT let him keep using you as a punching bag. STAY STRONG! Ditch this c**t!!
You can't just let him win. I wouldn't be happy with a sex tape of me on the net, but I would be less happy knowing that I had the opportunity to get out of a fundamentally destructive relationship and I gave it up because of the possibility of a video being put online that could easily be removed.
You know what you need to do. Don't let him beat you. You've come so far.
destructive relationships only ever get worse in my experience. u r better than letting him win.
It's a better option than staying with an abusive boyfriend and putting your life to a halt while he drags the rest of your self esteem down to the gutter.
Most videos on the internet are quickly forgotten. Temporary humiliation is better than getting beat up and ruined mentally and essentially be held as a prisoner for the rest of your life.
do you really think he's going to want a video of HIMSELF all over the net having sex? NO.
he's just trying to scare you and its working.
i was in an abusive relationship a few years ago. it was nowhere near as bad as yours (as it wasn't as violent) but it left me a mess. i was with him 3 1/2 years yet really, i knew he was wrong for me after a few months. he has LOTS of naked photos of me and a video of me errr doing something. he probably still has them. the thought crossed my mind he'd show other people if i left him but i took that risk.
just leave him hun.
yes, there is a possibility he will show people the video but the thing is, unless you delete the video yourself, he's always going to have this hold over you. you could end up spending the rest of your life with him.
leave now. this all just sounds like a threat to me. i know i wouldn't threaten my boyfriend with a sex video of us if he wanted to leave me! i wouldn't want people seeing the video myself!
call his bluff, leave him. its very unlikely he'll actually show people the video. if he does, he'll just be making an idiot out of himself.
you have got a chance to be happy here by walking away and starting a new life. don't throw that opportunity away. seriously.
You've just had proof that his threats are empty ones... He's mentally abusing you so much that you're losing respect for yourself... please don't.
You're important.
And you shouldn't let anyone make you think otherwise.
You have a choice.
You don't have to be sat in tears over this like you have been.
You've already proven how strong you really are by leaving him the first time. We all know you are. Please have faith in yourself and don't let this carry on.
This might help, because I think it's very relevant.
and this is gonna sound blunt but ... would you rather everyone see you having sex, or you end up dead? he's hit you before, who is to say he won't throw you down the stairs next?
Re: Paris Hilton sex tapes etc - publicity stunt, there are rumours that she was happy for it to be broadcast from the start. Think of the worst case scenario *if* he did manage to get it online (and it would be taken down promptly) vs the worst case scenario of staying with him.
You were strong enough to finish with him, you are strong enough to get through this.
I can't add anything to the thread because everything that needs to be said has been said. I suggest you calm down for a moment and read this thread very slowly...you'll know then what you need to do. Chin up. :thumb:
Don't let him do this to you, I know it sounds shallow but you've got us here to help you through this.
THIS WON'T HAPPEN FOR FUCK SAKE!!!!
will a kidnapper shoot his only hostage?!? If he would, he's fucked, because then the police comes barging in and he has nothing on his hands for leverage.
come on! Don't act this silly when you've been so far already. LISTEN TO THE PEOPLE IN THIS THREAD! Why do you always think you are the smartest person who got it all figured out and we are just talking some empty soothing words?
calm down strubbs, it's obviously a very emotionally stressful situation, and as much as we want to help lover she has to find the strength etc. from inside herself. Of course we are here for moral support etc. but we can't force her to do anything and really imo should try to be supportive rather than scalding. Just my opinion though.
Agreed.
It might seem really frustrating to onlookers, but when you're stuck in this kind of situation you really can't see the wood for the trees.
She's being emotionally abused; the last thing she needs is for complet strangers to sound really agressive towards her.
He came round mine last night and i think he could tell i really didnt want to be in the same room as him, i flintched when he tryed to touch me and didnt want to sit near him. he deffo picked up on these vibes and i think he has slowely realised that he might of had me back, but he never really had ME back, does that make sence? like i was there in body but not in mind.
Anyway, he told me that becuase i had given him a "second chance" (only becuase he was threatening me with the videos again) that he felt a lot better about the situation. he said he could see and feel i wasnt into him as much as i was in the past and that i never would be again. he said he has cryed as many tears as he can over me and feels drained now.
We left things on good terms, and he really seems to be accepting things this time. he has even got himself a job now he said and is moving on with his life. I am hoping this is all for real and he is not luring me into a false sence of secruity but i don't think this is the case, i think he hbas finally realised i am ready to move on from him.
As for the vids, he said he never had any in the first place....
I'm going to portsmouth tomorow to view 2 rooms in houseshares, im excited! plus im meeting that cute guy from work on his lunch break so things are looking up for me. yestersay was one of the worse days of my life but i am hoping im back on track now. x