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Its worth remembering too that if he does put the clip online you could always get it removed from the site it is hosted on relatively easily.
He tried it with violence, now with blackmail. I think it's just empty words, cuz he knew how easy it was to turn you around (just saying he will go to the pub and you'd be crawling), but you don't know what comes next. So as soon as the video is up (if he really follows through), visit your local police station and contact the website he put it on to remove it.
On a more sensible note, i left my ex after 6 years a long time ago now. It is very hard to do but you know its the right thing to do and you must rememver that, you deserve alot better and you will get that but not by going back with this bloke.
Well done on making the first move.
Next move is to either ignore his calls/change your number (thats what i did after a week or so) or just every time he calls be blunt and firm telling him its over and there is no going back. He will eventually get the message.
I told you he'd turn nasty. Didn't take long, did it? Sooooo predictable, his type. :mad:
Ignore him. If he DOES do it, you can get it taken down within minutes by reporting it. Also, if he does, get straight onto the police. He's just playing games yet again.
Trying not to do this in the uni computer room
>
Let him carry out his empty threats - you have the law on your side. He's clutching desperately at straws. Really proud of you, you'll look back on this and wonder what you ever liked about the guy
I am SO pleased for you, stay strong and Yay for Portsmouth! I've only really just realised how great this city really is! You'll love it!
xxx
As for the video, like others have said, inform the police. Don't shy out of doing so.
im shit scared, i have had to ring him and pretend that i still love him (i dont. i am 100% out of love with this cunt) and pretend that i want to get back with him just so he will delete the vid, i know he hasnt got another copy as its just on his phone, i am aware he can bluetooth it etc to mates but dont think he has actaully done that, to get it on the internet he would have to go and get his mate to do it at his house and im hoping he aint done this yet.
i am so bitterly disapointed. i was looking foward to going to pompey 2day and lookin at all these houses and hopefully moving tomorow. now i cant go. i have phoned up and aranged to view the rooms monday instead but have told the bf that im going to see friends that day whilst secretly looking at rooms.
i am meeting him tonight and im going to get him to delete that vid, once he has done that i am going to have an honest chat with him and tell him i dont want to be with him anymore.
I am not scared of giving in to him, i have so much fucking HATE for this pathetic excuse of a human being its unreal. im going to pretned to be nice and everything untill he deletes the vid then im going to tell him straight its never gunna happen.
I have never been so sure of anything in my life, i want out, i am getting stronger and stronger.
last night i went out with that cute guy from work to liquid and envy, i had an amazing night, the first time i had fun and truely relaxed in 6 months. i was so happy last night, i thought "wow things actaully look like they might be working out for me"... then all this shit with the vid kicks off today.
he is DESEPRATE to get back with me, i wish he would just fuck off and leave me alone. i use to be scared that i would hate the thought of him with another woman but now i couldnt give two shit, and i mean that.
How awful - It may well be that this is a hollow threat, but I'm not sure whether it's worth pre-empting this and getting in touch with facebook to let them know he's made this threat (you don't have to tell them what the video is, just that he's saying he's going to post something offensive that will cause you distress) and there might be something they can do. What do you guys reckon?
You're doing so well - hang on in there.
Don't dance to his music!!!
He's probably bullshitting about the vid and he controls you over it, even now, where you are separated from him! Look at the rooms, he will NEVER delete this vid, because it's the only means of pressure he has. He will look like an enormous cunt if he shows the vid to people. They won't probably care and just think that he is a huge asshole.
He is just bullshitting you, because he has leverage, but it's just empty threats imho.
NO! WTF ARE YOU DOING! That guy is potentially D-A-N-G-E-R-O-U-S! (read that three times!!!) Just remember how he smacked you. this is no child's play.
Cancel whatever you arranged with him. HE.WILL.NEVER.DELETE.THE.VID. It's his only remaining power over you.
I have to be SURE this video won't pop up anywhere as i don't want to be living in fear of it rearing its ugly head and people in my new job seeing it or somebody like my mum
i will be fine tonight, i am meeting him in a public place etc so he won't try anything dodge. and to be honest he is such a wreck at the moment, hes a big hard man but i have had in sobbing down the phone to me on loads of occisions becuase of this break up, he is just gratful that i am meeting him, and i pretty much have power over this whole meeting.
He probably aint as stupid as he is cabbage looking, and deep down knows that is the only reason you agreed to meet him
To delete it would mean he would have no hold over you anymore and because of that it wont happen
I know it's not a nice thing to think about, but if the video does go up, people will think less of him than they will of you. He will lose a lot of respect from a lot of people if he actually goes through with it (which, I dont think he will anyway)
If he does, simply report it to facebook, and report it to the police.
Oh and change the settings in your facebook so that tagged videos of you dont appear on your profile
sorry
but
WRONG
he has control and he knows it.
that's what you think he thinks....thats what he wants you to think he is thinking....
I doubt he is stupid enough to think you would be adamant about not meeting one minute, then as soon as he mentions a video, you change your tune and agree to see him
unfortunately, I really dont think he is that daft.....head fucks usually have more about them than that x
yeah you are right. he is pretty inteligant i have to admit, thats prob why hes so cruel and nasty, knows just the right thing to say to hurt people.
How did such a happy thread turn sour?
Thought things were going too well for me......
I know it must be hard, and stressful to think about a video like that coming out, but I would be willing to bet my last £10 that he wouldnt do that! Idle threats IMO
And mutual friends will probably disown him, I know I would if someone put an intimate video on facebook, it'd show him up to me the immature, nasty idiot that he really is
I mean, what are you gonna do if he refuses to delete it tonight? Go running back everytime he threatens to upload it? You cannot keep living your life like that hun x
Please just let it go, this video is all that he has to keep you dancing to his tune, he has tried to sweet talk you, then scare you, now blackmail you that is not the sign of a man in his right mind.
As powerful as you might be feeling now, it's no less than stupid to go play with fire (but it would be even more so if you didn't spend the entire time in a public place). You should have just gone on your way.
yeah, and he has a back-up on his computer (and if it's just for wank purposes)... Come on, don't waste your time here. As someone already said, if it pops up, it can be taken down within minutes, and then you have proof of it to go to the police, which you should actually have done since he hit you. you can't gain anything out of this meeting.
We met up, i demanded 2 see his phone and there was no videos or pics of me on there, i know he could uploaded them to another phone or pc so i'm hoping he didnt make copies. he said he didn't. i am thinking that if he did make copies then he would want me to know about them so he could threaten me with them. he did say he only said he would post it on the internet to get my attention and it worked as i was ignoring him before.
Anyway we had a meal togther, he paid for it all, i felt bad as i knew what was going to happen. he made his speech about how if i gave him another chance things would change and hes only recently realised how much he truly values me as he has faced loosing me. when i said no he started crying into his dinner, i felt awful. i still love this man (i know i said i didnt in an eairler post but i was mad then) and i could tell his tears were genuine. he is normally big hard man who would never be seen dead crying in public, it was heartbreaking to watch, all i wanted to do was reach out and cuddle him and say we would give it another go... but i stayed strong and its been really upsetting for me.
If you do meet him, arrange to meet him at the (public) place you're going, and leave in your own taxi. Don't give him any chance to be alone with you. But better still, don't go in the first place, and report his threats to the police. You do have the power in this situation, you're just not using it.
ETA: ah well you've been and your safe. That's the important thing. If he was genuine about changing, he wouldn't be threatening you with backups and making websites. He's bullshitting you. He has fuck all. And if he does, tell him you're going to the police (even if you're not, he's not the only one who can make idle threats).
this is the worse things that has ever happened to me, im trying my hardest to get him back, i will suffer and stay with him if it means no website, i cant deal with that. all i am trying to do is make a new life for myself and i cant with a website out there
Incidentally, it'd be very quick to see if the site name has been registered. Just type it in.
Step 2: If that website is made, report it to the police.
Step 3: Watch as he's in trouble and the website disappears.
Step 4: Go away and go on. Nobody will care.