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@struggling0_0 I agree that it’s unfair, you deserve the support you need

Your doing the right thing by talking about it here though, remember that, and there are ways you can get the help you need it just may not be through helplines but through something like seeing a doctor or someone in real life, I don’t know how you’d feel about it though because talking to people in real life is scarier than messaging someone and you said you struggle to communicate your point, but if it’s for your own well being it’s definitely worth facing the fear, and if you do see someone in real life write down what points you want to get across on a list and use that as reference when you’re talking to them

I’m not sure if this is helpful or not, sorry if it isn’t, but I want to try and help if I can

@JMMV2005 thanks:) but refusing support because other people are a bigger priority than me is unfair. i literally reached out to them due to suicidal thoughts and yeah i don’t matter clearly. i give up trying forreal lol

im sorry to be annoying but i’m so fucking annoyed. i don’t understand what makes me so undeserving if support. what have i done that’s such an issue:(

i’m trying so so hard and getting nowhere. it’s like im screaming for help but no one hears. i genuinely don’t know what to do anymore. i’m so fucking tired of reaching out and not getting help. i am really struggling tonight so reached out to calm, they joined the chat and said “Hi there, thank you for reaching out. Unfortunately, as explained before with you CALM have changed and tightened their remit which means that we are not longer able to support you beyond this point. We are strictly suicide specific now for people needing immediate help and do not offer long term support. If you are looking for a chat this evening you can always head on over to samaritans.org or https://giveusashout.org/ . We wish you the very best. Take good care, CALM.” - i don’t know what to do now. i am not using shout as i dont need police coming. there is no other places that offer a webchat / messaging service open right now. i can’t phone as i struggle with communicating how i feel verbally.

i don’t understand the point in helplines when they refuse help. i was using calm for their purpose, and im still a problem. i really do give up forreal. there’s no point talking to college about it either as im just an issue there too. i hate myself. i hate life.

i’m safe rn.

Hello @Azziman.

Yes. That is what happened. Well said.

I did feel that my perspective and emotions were ignored because the focus was on how she felt and the intention behind her comment.

Since the situation, I have been feeling very hurt, betrayed, and lonely. I have had to speak to many mental health services about my feelings as it has really been impacting me this week. I have been thinking they likely have not come to realise that they have not treated me right, and they are probably talking about me behind my back. I have been imagining bumping into my friend, and then she continues to defend her comment.

I called in sick today cause I am in pain as well as very irritable and moody probably from pain which isn’t shifting atm so I apologise if my message have been a bit hostile
I will probably go back to work tomorrow and just take all the max pills I can for pain,
And obviously cause it’s self harm i really don’t want them to think I would purposely do that after their work trying to make it heal. I want it to heal so I am hoping it won’t fail and if it does I hope they know it wouldn’t be because of me. I see them again soon I can’t even remember what day but they wrote it down for me I think Thursday. I just want to walk freely without pain and over heating from pain and on both feet. And the efforts I have to go through to have a shower without getting it wet is crazy. They make it out like it’s so easy just kick your leg out while showering. Um what about the water spraying and the water that inevitably falling down my body

Disclaimer: I am safe. I am capable of keeping myself safe.
One way I know people are lying when they say I’m not ugly, is when they recommend makeup. I know it’s a controversial opinion, but I think it’s bullshit when people say that makeup is meant to “enhance your natural features”. It’s obviously designed to hide your natural flaws, such as acne, eye bags, short eyelashes, thin eyebrows etc.

I would describe makeup as the equivalent of covering a nail fungus with a pretty bright nail polish. It doesn’t mean you no longer have a fungus, you’ve just hidden it. Hence, wearing makeup doesn’t make you attractive; it just hides the fact that you’re ugly.

And when people say I should wear makeup, I know they think in ugly. Despite engaging in my skincare routine and trying to get rid of my flaws (acne, short lashes, eyebags, wrinkles, thin eyebrows), I’m still considered ugly until I hide who I truly am with makeup.

When people say I should wear makeup more often (even if it’s intended as a compliment on my makeup skills) it breaks my heart. And it breaks my heart even more knowing that women will never be accepted in their natural state. This is just how the world is. Women are just born into a world where they have to hide who they are in order to have worth in life. I get the basics of taking care of yourself, in regards to grooming and taking care of your hygiene. But having short lashes or thin lips isn’t unhygienic.

“Makeup is all about putting in effort”
It’s my fucking face. I would prefer if you just called me ugly instead of hiding through this bullshit that makeup is the equivalent of dressing nicely.

And the fact that nothing about it can be changed makes me want to reattempt. Why would I want to live in a world where I have to hide who I am in order to be accepted. I would much rather be dead now than live that reality.