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Anybody want to vent or chat about anything? (Triggering stuff edition) w/c 15.09.25
Leyla
Community Manager Posts: 347 The Mix Regular
This is a space to chat or vent about things which you think may be more triggering for the Community but still want to get off your chest.
Every Monday morning we will close the thread and start a new one so we have a fresh one each week. If you'd like to check out this week's venting thread that isn't triggering, click here.
Every Monday morning we will close the thread and start a new one so we have a fresh one each week. If you'd like to check out this week's venting thread that isn't triggering, click here.
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Comments
@Amy22 sorry i'm a bit late responding to you. Nothing you said is stupid. Your entitled to vent and rant like everybody else is. You sound like your making enormous lifestyle changes right now, and i wanted to say that this is something you should be incredibly proud of. You've looked at your lack of independence and reliance on your parents, and you're taking active steps to get out of that cycle and into a more independent and positive lifestyle. That isn't easy at first, but once it becomes routine, it becomes a lot easier to do daily. And it takes a lot of courage to start to try and escape that safe and comfortable dependency.
You are right to be concerned about burnout. It's incredibly important to watch out for, so it's also vital that anything you do, you leave yourself enough time to be able to relax, chill out, and take a break at the end of every day. Giving yourself enough time for this is a must in the long term. You are doing a lot, and if you feel able to, and can guarantee you'll have a few hours a day of personal time still, then i think it's worth going for if your comfortable trying out those opportunities. And if it ever started to get to much, then you could look at maybe stepping back a bit.
That feeling of laziness is going to get better, the more your lifestyle changes for the better. We are all proud of the effort your putting in and the changes your making to your life. You should be too.
btw, love the profile pic
aww
@eylah i think that when that bird sat with you a week back and looked over you, that was definitely your mum as an angel, letting you know that she's still there, looking out for you, and honestly, what mum wouldn't be proud of you? You've still got that same kind heart you've always had despite all of the pain you've been through, which is something that is so incredibly rare, and that is 100% what angels are made off.
@Animalloverb You're doing such an incredible job with it all. Has anybody been able to offer you any kind of support through this all. I know you mentioned you don't really have anybody with you through this, but you shouldn't be going through this on your own mate. The hospital might be able to offer you a lot of support with everything, in terms of referrals to specialist counsellors like grief counsellors and they can also provide a specialist team dedicated to helping you with more practical aspects of things. And hospital chaplaincy's are also always willing to come and support you through things such as this, even if your not religious. I also want to just drop you this link for a bereavement support helpline, if you ever feel like it's too much, please give these a call: https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-support/
You're doing an amazing job, in the most horrendous of circumstances, and i'm really proud of you right now mate.
Thank you mate, I appreciate it.
No, nobody has offered me any support through this but I'm alright honestly.
I don't have anyone to even support me anyway.
Not long ago I lost my brother, that was hard, and even the funeral was awful, I was the only blood family left that he even had. I planned his funeral and everything. I was the one doing all the meetings and phone calls. It was rough and then now I am doing it all again for my fiancé, it's just a lot for a short amount of time.
Just having to do these phone calls are so different as everything is still so fresh in my mind, having to talk about the service to people and what I want the service to look like, and going with what my fiancé wanted.
To be honest, I Don't really want anything to do with the hospital right now.
I am very much religious, even if our relationship was 'against' the religion.
It's just really upsetting, I mean we never even got to have our full relationship, we never got to have the wedding she wanted.
She was really all I had left and now she is gone. And I was all she had too.
@Animalloverb i can't even begin to imagine how crushing this all is for you, after everything already, to have your world ripped from you so cruelly. It's completely understandable wanting as much distance from the hospital as possible after what happened. And there aren't any words that will ease things, but please, whenever it get's to much, or to overwhelming, this line is specialised for supporting people with grief (https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-support/). Even just to get practical advice with things, to lookup support in your area that might be available, and so it's not something you have to face alone, it's there for you mate.
You're one of the kindest souls out there Bea, and you don't deserve any of this pain. Even though it might feel like it, you aren't alone. If you ever want somebody to listen and to talk to, i'm here for you.
i agree. i rly think that bird was my mum. makes me sad thinking abt it bc she’s not here anymore but i had a ladybug today stay on me when i was waiting for ppl to come to my house so i think it’s definitely my mum.
@eylah thanks eylah. I ended up having to go to a safe haven yesterday, but when i got there after walking 3 miles in the rain, they wanted all my personal information to open up a referal for me and to see me. So, i spent a few minutes thinking, and decided to apologise for wasting there time, and set off back home. It was a shitty experience. But i got some really good advice from a really good friend, who talked me into going to Kelly's heroes. And things have been a little better now. Can't thank her enough.
And yeah eylah, it'll always be small things like that. Just so you know she's there watching over you, and your never alone.
@eylah nothing you say is stupid. I'm sorry but i need to make that bit clear, and every single person here would agree with me on that. You're worries and fears are completely valid, and you have nothing to be sorry about. There isn't much i can say that can ease that fear, but i just want you to know that we're all with you, you aren't alone, and none of what you feel is stupid. You were so incredibly brave waiting for the surgery before. You can do this eylah, we're all incredibly proud of you.
thankyou so much. i just had a full on cry and i feel better. i let everything out.
I have a sense of impending doom and anxiety and panic are sky high right now.
The only release for all this that I can see if to hurt myself but if I do that I don’t know if I’ll stop.
I’m a failure and a burden
Why am I here
Why am I going through another year of life if nothing ever changes or gets easier.
Sorry to be a burden to everyone needed to get this out before I do anything