Home Health & Wellbeing
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. For Crisis Support (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Want to share your experience of using our Community?

We're collecting Community Case Studies which could be used on our website, on social media, shared with our volunteers, or shared with third parties who may be interested to hear how online communities help people.

Click here to fill out our anonymous form

Anybody want to vent or chat about anything? (Triggering stuff edition) w/c 15.09.25

2»

Comments

  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 5,396 Part of The Furniture
    Hi mate, it's all okay, no need to apologise we all have lives outside of here.

    Yeah I only really told someone just incase they got worse, I mean nothing can be done as I have a medical condition that causes me to have seizures so I am used to it but as I had more than one in a short space of time I let someone know just incase I went into status.

    Oh yeah I know, but at this moment in time these phone calls seem to be getting me absolutely nowhere and I know this probably sounds absolutely ridiculous but I am debating whether to just go over to Romania at this point and speak to them in person because these phone calls are clearly not working out. I will have to sort my passport and everything out though first which will take a while.
    But I Don't really have to time to be doing that right now as I have so much other stuff going on right now, like I have someone in hospital, and I have work, and so many other things, and I simply will not be able to afford it right now either.

    My apologies for ranting to you mate.

    You can rant as much and as little as you want or need @Animalloverb we are all here to help as much or as little as you need ❤️
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    I mean like I have someone in hospital who has just been diagnosed with a rare form of brain cancer, not going to go into details but they are only 2 years old for heavens sake.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    So yeah I am having to support them the best I can right now, while still grieving the 3 recent losses, my brother, my fiancé, and my friend. As well as so much other crap that I really don't want to talk about right now.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    Appreciate it @Redemption
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    @DonnerKebab
    Hi mate, it's all okay, no need to apologise we all have lives outside of here.

    Yeah I only really told someone just incase they got worse, I mean nothing can be done as I have a medical condition that causes me to have seizures so I am used to it but as I had more than one in a short space of time I let someone know just incase I went into status.

    Oh yeah I know, but at this moment in time these phone calls seem to be getting me absolutely nowhere and I know this probably sounds absolutely ridiculous but I am debating whether to just go over to Romania at this point and speak to them in person because these phone calls are clearly not working out. I will have to sort my passport and everything out though first which will take a while.
    But I Don't really have to time to be doing that right now as I have so much other stuff going on right now, like I have someone in hospital, and I have work, and so many other things, and I simply will not be able to afford it right now either.

    My apologies for ranting to you mate.

    @Animalloverb Don't ever say sorry for talking about things mate. You've listened to every single one of us when we were struggling with things. You deserve all that support and kindness you gave to so many others right back.

    There isn't anything ridiculous about going straight to Romania, but what might actually be a more cost effective solution, and might take a bit less of your time up without needing your passport would be heading to the Romanian Embassy in London. Rather than heading straight to Romania, you could discuss the situation with embassy staff in person, bonus points if she had Romanian citizenship, and you could discuss it as a case of repatriation. That might be able to make things slightly easier for you, and might make embassy staff more obliged to help.

    And as long as somebody knows your situation, and is able to check in with you from time to time, even just for the seizures to make sure your not in status, is comforting to know. You're doing your best in the most horrific of situations.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    @DonnerKebab
    Yeah I was thinking of doing that to be fair. I may have a look and go down there.
    But I do actually need to get my passport sorted out anyways as I will need it to get to Romania for the funeral service anyway.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    I actually went to My fiancé's house this morning to try and sort through some more stuff while doing some phone calls and yeah I had to leave soon after as I just couldn't cope. I just burst into tears.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    I was literally questioned when sorting my brother's funeral as we were not blood related. Like dude I am the only family this kid had left, I am the only one left to organise it. So having arguments with people trying to sort my fiancé's funeral out is also bringing back the fact my brother is no longer with me which isn't helping.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    @DonnerKebab
    Yeah I was thinking of doing that to be fair. I may have a look and go down there.
    But I do actually need to get my passport sorted out anyways as I will need it to get to Romania for the funeral service anyway.

    @Animalloverb it's good thinking mate, because passports can take 3 weeks to come through with the standard service, where as the embassy can be accessed with just a train or coach ticket to london, within days. So, it's the fastest option to see anybody who you need to from the romanian goverment for this all, and it's a good idea to put in for that passport at the same time, the sooner the better.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    @DonnerKebab
    Appreciate it mate,
    I will shut up now, sorry.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    I actually went to My fiancé's house this morning to try and sort through some more stuff while doing some phone calls and yeah I had to leave soon after as I just couldn't cope. I just burst into tears.

    @Animalloverb that's completely normal and to be expected. It's not something that can be just ignored or shut away and it's okay if it hits you hard. It will take time to come to terms with and process, but every step you take, is a little more progress towards coping. It's incredibly brave of you to even be trying this, and i am incredibly proud of you.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    @DonnerKebab
    I appreciate it mate, thank you.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    @DonnerKebab
    Appreciate it mate,
    I will shut up now, sorry.

    @Animalloverb Nope. For one, you have nothing to be sorry about. And two, you don’t have to keep everything bottled up if you don’t want to. This is your space too. You’re sharing something incredibly heavy that’s weighing on you, and as your friend I’m here to listen mate. I'm here whenever you want to talk, like you've been here for me, and everybody else.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    @DonnerKebab
    I appreciate it so much mate, but honestly I do have to bottle everything up, I can't be sharing this crap.
    It's my life, so it's my crap to deal with, I can't be weighing it onto other people as that isn't right.

    And I have a job to do, I can't be having all these problems when I am meant to be showing up for people.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    @DonnerKebab
    I appreciate it so much mate, but honestly I do have to bottle everything up, I can't be sharing this crap.
    It's my life, so it's my crap to deal with, I can't be weighing it onto other people as that isn't right.

    And I have a job to do, I can't be having all these problems when I am meant to be showing up for people.

    @Animalloverb the thing is mate, you've been there for so many others when they've shared there problems and struggles. And each time, you help them as best you can, and that means the world to so many people. You deserve to be able to lean on others for support too and to have people listen to you in your hour of need. I completely respect your decision, but i need to make this point clear. You aren't a burden on anybody for talking about this stuff and venting to them. You're getting the same kindness that you show to so many others.
  • AnimalloverbAnimalloverb Posts: 370 Listening Ear
    @DonnerKebab
    I really appreciate that mate.

    My head has just been really messed up with everything at the moment, and knowing I have nobody I can go to about anything, it's been that way for ages so I have been so used to just getting by on my own and keeping things to myself and showing up for others even if I am living through what feels like hell.
    So opening up on here and stuff is just a really new thing to me as I have never been able to speak about anything at all before.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    @DonnerKebab
    I really appreciate that mate.

    My head has just been really messed up with everything at the moment, and knowing I have nobody I can go to about anything, it's been that way for ages so I have been so used to just getting by on my own and keeping things to myself and showing up for others even if I am living through what feels like hell.
    So opening up on here and stuff is just a really new thing to me as I have never been able to speak about anything at all before.

    @Animalloverb i think i know what you mean. It sounds a bit like what we call caregivers syndrome, where you've been supporting others for such a long time, and haven't really have much chance to give yourself that same kindness. And it can make it difficult to open up anywhere given you've not been able to for ages. You've been carrying so much on your shoulders for so long, so it's going to be tricky starting to get comfortable enough to open up about these things, and it's never done overnight, but you're already making such huge amounts of progress, and it's important to stop and look at how far you've come with it. Just by talking on here, that alone shows just how strong you are. I just want to add, you'll always have friends here bro, and you'll never be without someone to talk to.
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 5,396 Part of The Furniture
    How are you @DonnerKebab ?
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 2,044 Boards Champion
    Redemption wrote: »
    How are you @DonnerKebab ?

    @Redemption just surviving as usual mate. how about you?
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 5,396 Part of The Furniture
    Redemption wrote: »
    How are you @DonnerKebab ?

    @Redemption just surviving as usual mate. how about you?

    Not too bad thanks and sorry wrong thread @DonnerKebab
Sign In or Register to comment.