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It’s also incredibly easy to miss an email - I don’t know about others but I get a steady stream of emails throughout the day, many of them are from here through notifications. They all come from the same email account.
But yes, it would be strange for staff to still recommend using DMs, though I recognise it may be habit.
Edit: right enough, i can’t even start a DM conversation with the staff anymore, though I could reply if they sent me one.
@TheMix, I can’t DM you, there’s no button on your profile or new message button either.
Also, if people want to share their details, they were going to do it regardless. That is my choice.
Is there a link to this guidance anywhere? I could google, but I feel it should be linked.
Edited to add that my old conversations with the staff team are also gone. Maybe the staff should make a normal members account to see what we see, because I’m not seeing half of it - I can’t DM the staff, I don’t have my old DMs with them, and I can still reply to others DMs.
Edit: conveniently that post has now been deleted, I did try to find the link to prove it says this.
very good point @independent_ i remember exactly what post you mean!! it very clearly is possible then and we, once again, are just being lied to…
I think the problem here is, regulars do spot these things. We know when things don’t add up.
I should not be making this post, and I doubt I will get through to anyone with a soul in their body but I just can't help it. The community deserves to be informed of the truth, which you constantly fail to provide. Honesty has always been my most important value ever since I joined these boards, and it will stay that way. I feel like people need to see this is not a safe space anymore and finally move on, unfortunately. Its such a shame.
Yes, there are also risks with literally everything else on the internet! With this thinking you should've closed down the entire organisation by now.
Do you know what the words 'recommends', 'limiting' and 'reduce' mean? It definitely doesn't mean 'remove completely and suddenly without any prior warning'.
That's the WHOLE FUCKING POINT of you informing us in advance!! I have a friend I trust here, how do I stay in contact with them now?? You want me to instead share my contact here for the entire boards to see??? Its not for you to decide who I make friends with or not, we're more responsible than you think.
Admit, you were scared of people discussing this change behind your backs without your control over it. You were scared of people leaving the mix for good. Cause if they made friends here they can't leave with them now, and are stuck here with whatever bullshit you are planning to feed them. That isn't fair.
Oh and if they did leave. They would move to websites and apps that do have the "technology, resources, and legal obligations" that you seemingly don't. They will finally talk to each other in a place that actually is safe. Isn't that what you'd want if you can't provide that yourself?
I won't even mention what was already said about the conflicting info that this change was 'sudden' for you too. Lies. You all knew in advance. Just like all the mods already knew stuff long before we did, and were slowly leaving this place one by one so we didn't suspect anything. But we're not as stupid as you think.
Meaningless words.
That is incredibly irresponsible to just suddenly delete so much data at once without prior notice. Unless they aren't completely inaccessible and this is another one of your lies...
So many meaningless words...
I don't believe that. They don't all have 'advanced AI moderation tools'. If they do, it's still not 100% effective (doesn't mean they delete the option to chat though do they).
And you say you don't have the technology huh? Aren't you already using AI though for age verification? And what about the article you sent me some time ago about the Prince of Wales visiting you and you discussing the use of AI?
Link to that article:
https://giveusashout.org/latest/prince-of-wales-visit-marks-new-chapter-for-shout-and-mental-health-innovations/
Yeah yeah, where you can monitor everything we talk about.
You know, if it is so difficult to allow DMs just for over 18s, how is it that it's allowed just for messaging mods? I thought you kept reiterating that its strictly a platform-wide change, then how have you specifically chosen to keep it working for messaging the mix?
I am a dev myself. This is not hard to implement. Plus you have literally already done it lol.
Again, why is it that bad if those platforms have the technology to keep people safe that you don't?
If you really cared about people and making friendships, there are a million better ways you could've gone about this.
Why not teach people about internet safety instead of removing the problem entirely? Do you not understand that limiting people in such ways will literally cause them more harm as they will find other even less safe ways to communicate on the internet.
If you put the fire out you can save a kid from burning themselves... until they come across another flame when you're not there. Teach them that fire burns, and they will never hurt themselves again.
Why not add info to the DMs teaching people how to stay safe, and how to reach out to help whenever they feel like there is anything wrong.
I apologise for my language in this post. If I sound pissed its because I am. I have been hurt by life enough, and I wouldn't want anyone to be left without the support they deserve. I should be sleeping now ahead of another difficult and painful day. But instead I'm here trying to argue with myself hoping that maybe some soul sees this and actually decides to listen for real once instead of constantly pretending they do. I wouldn't be here if I still had hope in this community.
This place means a lot - don't waste it.
I'm glad you have shared eventhough I don't know how long it will be until they delete it because they like things to be hush hush sadly. The biggest bombshell has dropped, the users deserve to know the truth about being lied to. The higher ups and staff clearly knew what was going on but never bothered to tell us when they could have. Wasn't the whole point of the mix user based so any new decisions would be put to users to say their say so. It's like we don't matter anymore to them sadly. The place that was built on trust has become untrustworthy quite sadly ish. I hate having to post this too but someone needs to speak up for everyone.
Well said 👏 I totally agree with you, we the users are getting tired of it all now and these changes are doing more harm than necessary.
I’d like to raise a few concerns, and I’m confident that I’m not the only member who feels the same way.
While I fully understand the importance of safeguarding and legal compliance, especially in light of the Online Safety Act (2023), the lack of notice and clear communication has caused unnecessary distress and confusion. It’s evident from your own statement that there was a failure to communicate transparently about the decision-making process, which has impacted many users who relied on DMs for genuine, respectful support and connection. The lack of openness has only amplified the confusion and risks of eroding trust.
I also feel it’s important to clarify that some of the legislation referenced appears to be more aligned with the Safeguarding Policy than enforceable law. While the intent to align with best practice is valid, presenting it as a strict mandate without nuance risks misleading the community and undermining trust.
There also seems to be inconsistency in the explanation provided, as pointed out by @shannon_164 . Initially we were told the team was unaware that DMs would be switched off without warning, yet the edited message later stated that this decision was intentional due to safeguarding concerns. These two statements do not align. This kind of contradictory messaging undermines confidence and trust and highlights the need for clearer, more transparent communication that again, has a direct impact on the community.
Lastly, while public spaces like discussion boards, and support chats etc. are valuable, they do not replace the need for private peer-to-peer support. Particularly for those who might not feel comfortable sharing openly. Disabling DMs without a co-produced plan or alternative in place has created the gap in support that needs to be acknowledged and addressed.
I strongly encourage the team to reflect on this feedback and take active steps to improve communication, transparency, and community involvement in future decisions. When changes of this scale are made — particularly ones that impact trust, connection and emotional safety — it’s essential that the community is engaged, informed, and considered throughout the process. This space is built on mutual respect and wellbeing, and that must be reflected not only in policy, but in practice.
Many thanks,
Lilibet
I’d also like to add how you ( @TheMix ) have said that you strongly discourage sharing social media etc. Strongly discouraging something does not mean that it’s strictly prohibited; it means it’s advising against something. I’m linking back to clear communication (that I’ve spoke about in my previous message) and what is expected in the community. Unless this becomes a strict guideline or policy to follow — you can’t stop others from sharing their information.
It'll be Christmas before they give us a response to be fair 😂
christmas 2057, not even christmas 2025🤣
I'll be ancient then i don't how old wait let me get my calculator out *pulls out calculator* (yes I had to use the calculator app on my phone because I'm bad at maths 🤣).
I'll be.... *drumroll*
55 years old and probably kicked off the mix because I'll be over 26 then 😂 😂 unless...nah
I guess it will be a good Christmas present kinda, might be my only one lool