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Sexual assault
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I can tell you that you truly don't deserve it. You can't let them be the reason to hide in your bedroom. But if its the only place you feel comfortable while they're around then do what you feel is best. xx
I think I read somewhere that it can be anything from a touch, a peck on the cheek, a brush against the skin. I think its any unwanted physical contact, even a hug. If its done in a way that you feel is wrong or meant as intimidation then I think it could be anything.
If you remember I said before, some guy pinched my bum. I know he didn't mean much by it, just a bit of fun to look big in front of his friends, but it still made me feel sick and really uncomfortable. If it hadn't been for the fact my friend was crying when it happened, I think I would have ran after him and hit him I was that angry.
They say spiting at the police you can be arrested for assault.
I don't think your being too sensitive. If you don't want someone to touch you they have no right to, its your body at the end of the day. You have to feel comfortable in your own skin, and that can't start if people touch you when you're not happy about it. Get use to your own skin first then maybe you'll accept the touch of others.
I'm still struggling with this, but I like to think I can make exceptions now and then.
If you are ignored, keep saying it over and over. If its someone you have to be around regularly, it may be worth telling them seriously and calmly, that you would like them to please respect your personal space, that their behavior is unacceptable, or making you uncomfortable. It may be hard, but it might help. The only other thing would be to report them. To the university, police, if you feel its necessary. It is important to feel safe.
Never tolerate even the smallest amount, if its upsetting to you, it shouldn't be tolerated.
I hope I made some sense, I haven't been very well, and can't look at the screen for too long, and my head is all over the place. xx :yuck:
And it doesn't matter if you use that as an excuse. Nothing, (not that I can recall, but I have wondered!) has happened to me like that, but I hate my body, don't like to be touched and feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I've always been over sensitive, emotionally and with this issue of unwanted touching.
I think you could start small, handshakes and hugging maybe! -Try with friends and family if you feel happy to. Don't rush, always go at your own pace.
Do you mind me asking what they have been doing? Maybe I can help. xx
Did you do it anyway? You could always go back, and even if it is formalized that isn't necessarily a negative thing, and I don't think it means you have to go any further than you are able to. They may even be able to over exclusive help and organisations to help you through.
This must have been very hard for you. You are taking a really brave step. Wishing you all the best. xx
Did any of the links have advice on making statements?
Is it the police you went to?
I can't be sure, but from what I have heard and read, the police give you some control and say over what happens next, and offer support too.
Perhaps these sites can help. Some have other men sharing their thoughts and feelings about their experiences, others offer advice and support. xx
www.survivorsuk.org
www.irwinmitchell.com/Abuse
www.malesurvivor.org/
When I started getting help, I realized that if that were true, I would have never been born in the first place.
*hug* *hug*
Have you made any friends at uni?
xx *hug*
I wish I knew what to say to comfort you.
Is being there at uni making it worse? If it is, you really shouldn't worry about having to be there. Don't put yourself under stress, or purposely force yourself into things if your not ready. Have you thought about what I said, concerning uni? Working some arrangement out with them to go back when you're ready. Maybe you're taking on too much at the moment. If you feel that's true, you should just concentrate on yourself and your thoughts right now.
Having everything else to worry about can't be helping. Do you think that might help? Concentrating on one thing and one thing only, yourself.
Sending you warm thoughts xx. *hug*
Sometimes it might seem like getting rid of the pain by dying is the only solution, but it's not. Have a look at this survivor's story on how it can be possible to move on after sexual abuse.
Please also have a look at some of the websites mentioned, where you can call anonymously and open up freely and unjudged about everything you are feeling and they will listen. Have a look at this article on our site on feeling suicidal.
Hopefully posting here is helping because we are not going anywhere :yes: You mentioned before that you like listening to music and that it helped - is there a new playlist you could create this week to get through your pain?
As Holly showed you are not alone in this and many people respond with similar feelings - and you can get through this. Apart from helplines and professional help do you have other people you can open up to about this?
Stay strong remember you are not alone *hug*
I hope you're ok.
Is it the kind of thing that you can make amends for? Don't let it get to you just yet, there may be a solution.
You have people here ready and waiting to listen. *hug* *hug*
What's happened? *hug*
Your death? Why your death?
I don't really think I had faith before, but I like to believe I have it now, in myself. Everything else can easily disappoint you.
Even if I don't know how to help you I can at least do this. xx