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Yes but this topic has turned into you getting the advice and it basically being your thread, which wasn't the case with BarmyArmy.
How come no one is lynching that idiot above who made a post consisting of " . " ? he's only trying to help himself and me too.
Don't worry it ain't your fault, you haven't hi-jacked anything.
Again not his fault everyone started obsessing over getting to see photos of him.
Well I'll rephrase, I don't have anyone to go with, mates or otherwise.
What have you got to lose (?)
Well that's not true at all is it? You made over 15 replies, with over 4 pages of comments with absolutely not one comment about Hornet's situation, you posted a picture of yourself, you discussed whether Oxbridge graduates are treated differently, you discussed whether you and your group of friends are differently treated because of your education. That isn't one reply, it isn't one off-hand comment it's an entirely different debate. It also lead to other posters becoming confused about the different situations Hornet and you were experiencing.
And I'm sorry Hornet, you may not mind someone else taking a thread about yourself off-track to discuss themselves but we do. We believe a thread you start about the problems you are facing deserves to be about you, not some one else. I kinda wish you'd see it the same way, but regardless that's our view of how threads should proceed. Threads should stay on topic, not discuss widely varied issues that are of no help to your situation. I don't believe it's appropriate that a thread you started should be a discussion about whether someone else looks good in a blue top, even if you think it's fine for Jomerey's looks to be more important than your own situation.
Oh, and as a final point, if a user is shouted at they will know it.
**Helen** made a valid point about the direction of this thread and its usefulness to Hornet and doesn't deserve to be misrepresented that way.
As soon as you finish your course and have got yourself an income look at shifting your CDL to another loan provider, because the CDL interest rate is evil (with the Barclays one is was, anyway) - I borrowed the full £8k, repaying over 60 months at £181, but when I got my first annual statement (i.e. 12 months into repaying) I still had just under £7k to go...
Having had just opened an Alliance and Leicester current account I was able to take out a loan with them at 5.9 APR (they guarantee current account holders their advertised rate if they offer them a loan), SO for borrowing £7,500 (the lowest amount you could borrow for the 5.9 rate), I'm now paying only £175 per month - and gained an extra £500 in the process
Not entirely sure how I've been dragged into this lol.
Hornet - I can understand if you have no friends going to a pub or club on your own would be hard, I'd not be able to do that. What you really really should go for is so-called "NETWORKING EVENTS". A new phenomenon which happens in cities. Not speed-dating but parties where the explicit point is to meet new people. I went to a networking event at a bar on Saturday, went on my own without knowing anyone, and was fine approaching guys and girls as you wouldn't be told to sod off as everyone's there to meet new people. Ended up spending the night having fun with a group of 5 friends, who if I wanted to may be able to join their social group. Only because I was asked to by about 5 people. I didn't want to put a pic of myself up, my anonymity is important given the context. Because someone else brought up that topic and I responded to it. Because someone else brought up that topic and I responded to it. So basically I'm guilty of replying to people when they asked me questions. Sorry, I should just ignore everyone shouldn't I. And it's my problem people are too stupid to notice the difference between "Jomery" and "hornet" in a sizeable font as well? Love how you've now locked "my" thread.
All you've done throughout your own and hornets thread is to pick holes into what everyone else is saying.
Have you even stopped for a second and thought that maybe, just maybe(!) the problem lies with you?
Now you obviously have a lot of issues and seem to be under the impression that you're better than everyone else, but if this really is the case, then how come the majority of the rest of us have no trouble pulling people yet you do? Attitude mate. yours is shit.
Put it this way: I'm willing to "share" a thread with someone who has similar issues to myself.
Your situation is very different in my eyes, if it isn't in yours then fair enough - but in our eyes you have a right to your own presence here - even if you're so quick to give that away to someone else...
:yes:
Doesn't mean you had to post it though, does it?
You need to stop making excuses for the attitudes of yourself and the people you associate with. Public school + intelligence + good university + good job does not have to = people with the attitude problems that a lot of your 'friends' seem to have. My boyfriend and his social group all went to Haberdashers Aske's, then studied at Bristol/Warwick/Cambridge. He's a trainee government lawyer, the others are in accountancy, banking, insurance, but not one of them have the snobby attitude that you describe. You seriously need to get yourself away from these wankers that seem to be unnaturally fascinated by your love life and find a bunch of people that have their feet a bit more firmly attached to the ground.
And Hornet, PLEASE start paying heed to the advice people are giving you rather than dismissing so much of it out of hand. A lot of the suggestions have been good stuff And are you going to post a profile thingy doofah whatsit on here? Apart from anything else, focusing on your interests and good points and seeing them all written down should give you a much needed confidence boost.
This shows how different your situation is to Jomery's... I wouldn't have given this advice to him, as he already seems to have a good social network around him, so doesn't really need to concentrate on the meeting new friends aspect before he turns his attentions to girls.
It just seems like you're rebuking all advice. What do you actually want this topic to achieve?
The amount of time this topic has been languishing on this board, you could have joined all sorts of clubs and societies or have gotten volunteer work. I guarantee you people there won't care one bit about your virginity status (if indeed after 19 pages that is what this topic is still about)
Don't break this post down into quotes - dismissing everything i say, just think about it. This topic has been here for 6 weeks, and you're still in the same position; so you've gained absolutely nothing from it. So maybe it's time to stop reading it, stop telling everyone that their ideas are no use for you and just get out there and do some of them.
Hell, if you live in Sheffield, then come out rock climbing with me... and if you don't just try some volunteer work, if you don't like it after a day, well you know to try something else next time. Life is an adventure if you will open yourself up to experiencing everything on offer. I'm sure you could fit some volunteer work around your college, and so what if you don't get paid, if your situation is as dire as you make it, you won't be able to even place a monetary value on the experiences you'll gain.
:yes: TBH, I think it's only a big deal if you make it out to be one.
:yes:
Do you have some sort of job that invovles working with/meeting people?
Maybe its the way you read it
I dont have 100% fool proof gaydar but i like to think i can tell
He is mega rich though! Maybe i should consider batting for the other team
Oh you're talking about the REAL Andy Peters
I thought you mean the poster there was typing in a camp fashion and that you was giving him a camp voice when you read it in your head.
He does sound a bit camp... Awwww I wanna be his friend!
Oh no thread hi-jacking, kill kill kill, your attitude is bad. *wink wink*
In reply to Andy Peters: I know it must sound like I am ignoring all the advice but I ain't. I wouldn't strictly agree that I've gained nothing from this, I've met Jomery, there's been a load of advice from loads of people, you included. As mad as it may sound to you, I still feel as though I'll be better off giving people a wide berth and the less I have to mix with them the better. They're horrible and I am yet to meet anyone who is not like that. A 20 year old virgin is not going to be taken seriously or accepted by anyone, anywhere. Try getting yourself a glimpse of their true colours before you sit in judgement of me and my bad attitude. I've had a negative impact on this place and I regret that.
I haven't actually read the 11 pages of this (or however many there are if there are more), because I didn't begin reading it when the thread was posted and tbh, can't be bothered reading them all now. I want to reply to this last post though.
It is very easy to make yourself a victim and say 'oh I have made a negative impact on this place and I am a bad person.' First of all, no you haven't. Secondly, no-one feels sorry for you and no-one will treat you as a victim because that would be patronising and we are all equals in life. I am willing to bet that you think like this (what you wrote above) in all aspects of your life whenever something goes wrong. It is not that you are a virgin or that you have no friends that is the problem, it is your attitude. If you act like you are the problem and you let people know you believe you are the problem, then they will believe you are the problem. So let go of that attitude towards yourself and just let yourself be. That is what everyone else does, and that is how you get friends and girlfriends that are real- by being real.
Repeat- You are not a victim. You are capable of being much more than that.
This is not meant to be offensive or any such, it is really meant to help, so I apologise if it comes across as some sort of 'go' at you.
Mila
On a serious note, mila is right. Its all about attitude. Feeling sorry for yourself will get you some initial support but going on about it and not doing anything about it will make people dont wanna hear.
Its like telling someone something and it going in one ear and out the other, its pointless to keep saying it unless they actually take it in and do something.
Its all about being pro active and actually making an effort to get where you want!
End of Positive Mental Attitude speech - Chris Akabusi Trademark
If you do that then how do you expect to make friends?
Why does losing your virginity matter so much to you? I'm only a few years younger than you but I couldn't care less what people think about me.
:yes: In one way I think this is going to be a vicious circle because you say you have no friends, which means you're going to have a negative atitude, which is return will meantat it's going to be harder to mkae friends.
All people are horrible. So everyone on this thread is horrible? Or is thesite a little oasis in the desert?
Do you think if you met some of the people from this forum they would rebuke you? That they haven't felt like you, or been in your position and do you think they haven't done something about it simply by being proactive?
I really think the best thing you could do is look for a job or do some volunteer work, why not try going into a primary school and helping out. Now there NO ONE will care whether you're a virgin or not, and you'll be able to gain loads of confidence by bossing kids about
1 phonecall, it's all it takes, you can put an end to this vicious cycle and this thread can return to the bowells of boards.