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Just an idea, but from reading your latest reply, it could be something to do with your attitude.
Its awful :thumb:
Interestingly though, it may be a load of patronising codswollop, but how many times have you actually done what I mentioned. Yeah, thought so.
I do also suggest, hornet, that you might try looking at the volunteering work site that is also run by youthnet. Doing something good might help to raise your profile.
Indeed volunteering can be a great way to meet new people - in an enviroment that's very different from a nightclub or pub.
Just check out do-it.org.uk for a database of literally 1000's and 1000's of volunteering opportunities.
Ok, give us a format first. Like the questions you want answered.
Awful, is it? Then how come I happened to agree with the other two people I quoted?
Hmm, I'd rather find a job with pay, lol.
That's good but we're referring here to what you could do instead of going to nightclubs, which you obviously hate, or moping around feeling sorry for yourself. Volunteering work is something you could do part-time. If you're doing positive stuff that is helping people it is something you can talk about. People will appreciate you for it. Well the right sort of person would anyway. Even if they don't, you might appreciate yourself more if you actually feel like you are making a contribution to the world.
You either see sex as sex and not something more or you take the stance that its something you should share someone you care about. You cannot confuse the two or else you will end up messed in the head and confused about your feelings. You just have to see sex with a prostitute as just physical and not as a stepping stone to talking to girls.
Which I'm trying not to do. I really don't dee why he's so desparate to lose it anyway.
I would as well. Incidently, I have to do volunteering as part of my course and it has boosted my confidence quite alot.
I wouldn't have to tell them. I have never discussed my previous sex with my later partners.
Agreed, but doing a job that pays sounds like something that could do that and more. In fact I will have to when this course is over, to pay back the career development loan (a whopping £3000, I'm gonna be years paying back all that in monthly installments)
I'm worried about the future though. Where am I going to be in 2, or 5 years? My mum was always threatening to throw me out last year but has recently stopped, and I just don't feel ready for that. Don't feel ready to move and stand on my own two feet, no safety net. My mum seemed to find that difficult enough over the years.
Tbh I was wondering that.
because hornet has no friends at all. Jomery does have friends, even female friends, he just can't get in a relationship.
hornet: if you do some voluntary work now it will also place you in better stead to get a job later on. During the time you would otherwise have been in the pub had you had anyone to go with, you would be doing voluntary work. Doing that you may make some friends with other volunteers. You may even occasionally go down to a pub to have a drink after your work shift is finished.
You seem to have in your head one particular lifestyle, and assume that everybody else leads that lifestyle. I can tell you that many don't.
You have still failed to identify one positive thing about yourself.
I'm still waiting for your format for the profile you want. : )
By the way, "I spent 4 hours every week helping out under-priveleged people in the community" sounds a lot better on your profile than "I went to the pub every night, got stoned and shagged 20 women".
What's wrong with going to a pub by yourself?
Billy no mates??
Better to go with someone else at least!
Surely going to the pub by yourself is better than just sitting at home doing nothing?
And no, I've never actually been to a pub by myself. The only time I've been to a pub (twice, if you include Weatherspoons) I ended up going with someone and got introduced to two other people. (A friend's friend and his wife)
When you think about it, pubs are just for people who wanna sit down and drink, maybe play some pool or darts. Thats about all you can do part from talking to randoms.
Maybe its cos I'm gettin a bit older... but I love just going down the pub for a few every now and then. You get a chance to just sit down and have a laugh with your mates, and I love playing pool as well...
For me, i like to have a bit of a dance and you kinda look stupid if you started doing that in a pub!
Going back to the thread though, its all about expanding your interests, being enthusiastic to meet people and talking to girls without being worried of being knocked back. Don't try to target certain areas because it just limits yourself.
Sometimes it's nice to sit with a coffee and a book in a pub.
No smoking area of course. :yuck:
Yeah, don't get me wrong, I still love clubbing.
I prefer going to bigger events rather than normal club nights though, I'm a bit fed up with commercial music.
Anyway, this is side tracking from the thread a lot so will shh now
There must be many people who have "no mates" and if they just got together then they would have mates - each other. Actually, what exactly is the definition of a "mate"? If I go into the pub with a group of others, does that make them my mates? If you see a group of people together, are they therefore all mates or just a group?
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Not always. I ended up going to a gig last year (we went to a pub before going to the gig) and ended up going with a friend of mine & her boyfriend. When I got there, I met up with a few more friends and ended up with other people as well. (who at the time I didn't know)
Hornet - I can understand if you have no friends going to a pub or club on your own would be hard, I'd not be able to do that. What you really really should go for is so-called "NETWORKING EVENTS". A new phenomenon which happens in cities. Not speed-dating but parties where the explicit point is to meet new people. I went to a networking event at a bar on Saturday, went on my own without knowing anyone, and was fine approaching guys and girls as you wouldn't be told to sod off as everyone's there to meet new people. Ended up spending the night having fun with a group of 5 friends, who if I wanted to may be able to join their social group.