sex on a first date.

Former Member

i havent and i wouldnt. but thats just me personally. i wouldnt because i wouldnt feel comfortable enough to do it, i need to really know someone first.
but if others do it and they are happy to do it, then fair play to them!

Former Member

lipsy wrote:

i usually sleep with guys on the first date and it never puts them off. they always want to see me again.

but i'm pretty fussy when it comes to men. i knock a lot back before i say yes to a guy who i think has a personality to match his looks.

Youve summed it up for me. I am extremely fussy about men, but if someone passes all the tests, then why not.

Former Member

rainbow brite wrote:

and then it being crap or they had a tiny winkie.

Maybe this is why so many threads get started on does size matter?

Former Member

Nope.

Ilora x

Former Member

well the simple answer is that it does make a difference. Im not saying that it cant be made up for in other areas, and im not saying that everyone feels the same way as me. Some people arent bothered for sure, but for me, id be disappointed if id waited ages, got attached to someone and then found out they were teeny weeny.
Im not shallow, but I do like good sex.

Former Member

I have in the past but I always feel like shit after...now days I like to wait a little and if I actually like them enough to hav something that personal.
I also like to tease n build it up for a little too, makes the experience so much better!
Each to their own though, I make no judgements.

Former Member

i have done on 2 occasions. 1 being my current boyfriend and were still together after 2 years. if you both want to why not?

Former Member

I haven't and I don't judge potential life partners on how big their dick is or how long they can keep it up for. So it doesn't matter to me. Plus I need to feel confident with man before I do anything like that with them, without needing to get pissed first. But if I'd known the bloke as a person for a while and really wanted to do it then maybe I'd consider it.

Former Member

Every guy I've dated I have. Sometimes I go out just to get laid. To me sex is just sex. Whether its in a relationship or its just sexing around. I don't judge how good or bad the sex is to whether I want to keep the guy around or not. Sex is natural, like Mel said, if you both want to, why not. If people want to wait, fine, if people want to hop in the sack 2 minutes after meeting somebody then thats fine too.

Former Member

I've never really been on a date to be in that situation.

My ex boyfriend we were together 9ish months or something like that before we did it, due to the fact we were only 15, and my current boyfriend was about a month and half but that was really down to oppurtunity. I didn't really know him well enough at the very start to feel like i wanted to sleep with him.

Former Member

i haven't and seriously doubt i would....but then again, never say never.

Former Member

beans wrote:

my current boyfriend was about a month and half but that was really down to oppurtunity. I didn't really know him well enough at the very start to feel like i wanted to sleep with him.

see if i didnt feel like i wanted to sleep with someone, id just say we were friends.
I wouldnt date someone i didnt want to sleep with.
I dont understand.

Former Member

rainbow brite wrote:

see if i didnt feel like i wanted to sleep with someone, id just say we were friends.
I wouldnt date someone i didnt want to sleep with.
I dont understand.

It's not that i didn't want too, just not untill i was sure about him as a person on a whole relationship thing, do we get on are we compatible blah blah etc tec. I just didn't want to get that involved untill i knew him better, i still fancied him and we would kiss and what not but at the beging we were like brand new strangers to one another.

Former Member

i haven't
i wouldn't
if a guy wanted to he probably would just be after a quick shag
i wouldn't respect myself

Former Member

I haven't and I don't think I ever would.

Former Member

I've never actually been with anyone, but I couldn't just have sex with someone on a first date...

Former Member

ballerina says:

if a guy wanted to he probably would just be after a quick shag

that says more about you than anything else.

how do you explain how people have sex on a first date and then go on to have long term relationships?

Former Member

lipsy wrote:

that says more about you than anything else.

how do you explain how people have sex on a first date and then go on to have long term relationships?

Exactly, within 4 hours of meeting my guy we had sex. I spent the weekend with him and a while later we're enganged.

Sometimes sex is just sex. It's an enjoyable activity that 2 or more people partake in. (with the exception of younguns) I never saw why sex was such a big deal.

Former Member

lipsy wrote:

ballerina says:

that says more about you than anything else.

how do you explain how people have sex on a first date and then go on to have long term relationships?

That's their choice. Maybe it would be different if it was someone I'd known for years, but I don't know...

Former Member

canon wrote:

Do you?.....Male here! NO.

Dont you?.....Nope

Have you?.....I did it once and wish I hadn't. It's my quirk. I can't separate love and sex.

Would you?....Never again

Would it make you respect someone less?....No, I would blame it on myself. I have had sex without the emotional attachment and with it. Having sex without the attachment, for me, is no better than masturbation.

would it make you respect them more?....No. I suspect the girl felt if she gave sex I would keep coming back and I was hers. She got very possessive afterwards and I felt like a heel. I felt like I used her.

Is it a good way of screening out the crap shags before starting a relationship?....Hell no! There is more to a person that spreading her legs....uh like, brains, personality, character, education, ability to carry on a conversation after the sex. I don't want to view a female as a piece of meat and I don't her to do the same to me. Sex, to me, is a "whole body" experience, not just the sex organs.

do you think of it differently according to gender, ie worse for women than for men, or vice versa....Don't know how women feel about it but I am looking forward to reading their responses. I don't know how a free and open sex life with many partners in the 15-30 year old period affects the psyche of a female being a wife and Mother in the future. As I have matured I tend to think about this more.

I want to marry you.

I nearly had a one night stand but couldn't go through with it in the end. Luckily he wasn't the violent type. I wouldn't lose respect for a person. Although it isn't exactly my personal choice. I would question his motives if he hassled me for sex on the first date or any date.

Former Member

I have. On 2 occaisions.
The first, we went on to have a 6 month relationship. He didnt seem to have much respect for me. Whether thats coz he was an immature prat or coz of me, i dont know, nor do i care.
The 2nd time was 2 1/2 years ago and we're still together.
Would i again? i really dont know as i dont intend to be with anybody else. Ive found my man.
I dont think my fella lost any respect for me. Out situation was difficult and it started as just sex really, then developed from there. I wouldnt change anything about how it started or progressed.

Former Member

rainbow brite wrote:

[waiting then finding out] they had a tiny winkie. Itd be so much harder to break it off.

cripes, thats a bit harsh for them having a wee wee-wee. Couldn't you just, like, end the relationship?

Former Member

Carriage Return wrote:

cripes, thats a bit harsh for them having a wee wee-wee. Couldn't you just, like, end the relationship?

ROFL.

Former Member

I haven't on the first date, but have done it fairly quickly into the relationship with current bf. We have been together for almost 2 years now. I think, if the other person is up for it as much as you, then it's fine, like if your both on the same vibes. For my bf and I, we both wanted it and we both felt comfortable with doing it earlier on, so its cool. (plus were still together :-) )

Former Member

i never have, it takes me ages to feel comfortable enough to have sex with someone. i don't think i ever would really.

Former Member

nicebutdim23 wrote:

i never have, it takes me ages to feel comfortable enough to have sex with someone. i don't think i ever would really.

Gutted.

Former Member

I havnt and dont think i would.

Ive been offered it when on a '1st date' so yeah i wouldnt.

Skive

Renzo wrote:

I havnt and dont think i would.

Ive been offered it when on a '1st date' so yeah i wouldnt.

:eek2:

Mate, if there's a sexy lady offering it up, you should never pass up the chance.

Former Member

Skive wrote:

:eek2:

Mate, if there's a sexy lady offering it up, you should never pass up the chance.

He never said she was sexy She could have been a total sow.

Skive

my_name wrote:

He never said she was sexy She could have been a total sow.

Why would you go out with her int the first place then?