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Anybody want to vent or chat about anything? (Triggering stuff edition)

11617182022

Comments

  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @River that's all good river, I just wanted to check in to see you were alright. It's sucks not being able to sleep, despite trying to get sleep.

    Anyway, the reason i'm telling you this is to let you know, i know how it feels to be worn down by nothing being safe and always having to be hypervigilant, and that you're not alone in it. And there were some very low points it got me to over the years, which I think you're experiencing too. But just like me River, you also deserve to have a loving family, and a carefree life growing up, not have all sorts of problems thrust on you at a young age. That you didn't get it is pure cruelty from the system and people who were supposed to be there for you. None of it means you aren't worthy of a loving family and support.

    To clarify, the social care system is fucked. When i was 16, we managed to get my brother into an overnight residential care scheme, once every 2 weeks, he'd stay overnight, but within 6 months, that whole thing came crashing down. Essentially there was mistreatment there this one time, so we pulled him out of it. It's now the transition to adult social care, so even less is available now. So, currently, outside of his special needs school/college which ends next year for him, that's all. No support currently available besides that, but I am working on finding day care centres to give some respite for when he leaves school/college. Even had to fight like 3 appeals just to keep his transport going to school/college so bad is it. And growing up, the social care system wasn't exactly helpful even then for me. Being offered a training course on how to safely restrain my brother at age 13 isn't what i'd call support. 😂

    And thank you, sending hugs back <3
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    just checking in with everyone how is everyone? pls know im here for you all <3 i did reply to you all on the support thread but i dont think my msgs came through for anyone. but im here for you all. you’re so loved <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @eylah i'm surviving thanks. Thank you so much for your support in the support thread. It meant a huge amount to me. How are you feeling right now?
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    @DonnerKebab like i said in the support thread you’re always here for us and you deserve to be supported too. so i wanted to show you the same amount of love & kindness you show me. im glad you’re surviving and here today. we all care abt you so so much <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    @DonnerKebab I just want to check you're ok , I saw things are tough for you, sorry I didn't help, I feel a bit selfish for not helping you, sorry I was driving and was seeking support myself.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    Redemption wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I just want to check you're ok , I saw things are tough for you, sorry I didn't help, I feel a bit selfish for not helping you, sorry I was driving and was seeking support myself.

    @Redemption yeah, i'm always alright. Just feeling a little down is all from everything. You did plenty mate, don't worry about it.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    eylah wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab like i said in the support thread you’re always here for us and you deserve to be supported too. so i wanted to show you the same amount of love & kindness you show me. im glad you’re surviving and here today. we all care abt you so so much <3

    @eylah thanks so much. You always show so much love and care to others, so thank you for being you and supporting me so much. You really are a kind soul.
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    Redemption wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I just want to check you're ok , I saw things are tough for you, sorry I didn't help, I feel a bit selfish for not helping you, sorry I was driving and was seeking support myself.

    @Redemption yeah, i'm always alright. Just feeling a little down is all from everything. You did plenty mate, don't worry about it.

    @DonnerKebab I didn't see if you had anywhere to go, are you back home now ?
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    eylah wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab like i said in the support thread you’re always here for us and you deserve to be supported too. so i wanted to show you the same amount of love & kindness you show me. im glad you’re surviving and here today. we all care abt you so so much <3

    @eylah thanks so much. You always show so much love and care to others, so thank you for being you and supporting me so much. You really are a kind soul.

    sry im not getting mentions. howre you now?
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @Redemption i'm not sure if you saw everything i put, but she changed her mind. This is quite humilating, but she made me beg to stay. It's that or the streets and as 23 year old guys, there isn't any help out there for us. We are back of the queue mate. Not eligible for emergency accommodation or anything like that from even the council.

    Worst case scenario, she snaps again, i'll leave and just sleep in my car. It's SORN if you know what that means. Just as a safe place to sleep for the night for as long as i need.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    eylah wrote: »
    eylah wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab like i said in the support thread you’re always here for us and you deserve to be supported too. so i wanted to show you the same amount of love & kindness you show me. im glad you’re surviving and here today. we all care abt you so so much <3

    @eylah thanks so much. You always show so much love and care to others, so thank you for being you and supporting me so much. You really are a kind soul.

    sry im not getting mentions. howre you now?

    @eylah a little bit demoralised and feeling a little stupid, but outside of that, still surviving thanks
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    edited June 15
    @Redemption i'm not sure if you saw everything i put, but she changed her mind. This is quite humilating, but she made me beg to stay. It's that or the streets and as 23 year old guys, there isn't any help out there for us. We are back of the queue mate. Not eligible for emergency accommodation or anything like that from even the council.

    Worst case scenario, she snaps again, i'll leave and just sleep in my car. It's SORN if you know what that means. Just as a safe place to sleep for the night for as long as i need.

    @DonnerKebab I know it's tough. I'm so sorry what you're going through, I feel like crying over it. Yh I know what SORN means, like legally off the road, that's what I would have to worse case scenario, hopefully I never have issues that bad to get thrown out, I don't think my family would do it. Anyway im so so sorry, tbh I know it's an online community but if I was able to and you had no where to go I'd take you in like if I had my own house and space for you. I'm so sorry. I didnt know you had a car, I thought you hadn't passed your test yet, have you passed or is it to learn in?
    Post edited by Redemption on
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    I'll check up on you later @DonnerKebab
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @Redemption it's a vaxhaul Corsa. I don't have a license or anything, it just sits in the drive. Don't really go near it that much, but it is there for me. My older brother was gonna sell it, so i decided to throw him a few hundred for it like a few months back, just in case i did get driving one day and got my license.

    I spent most of my life as a carer for my brother because of his violent meltdowns, and within a short period of his meltdowns no longer effecting my mum (eg. he doesn't attack her anymore), i'm no longer needed and start getting threatened with being kicked out. Sucks.

    Anyway Redemption, i really do appreciate your kind words. It's just a tricky situation for me, but I'll land on my feet. And I know you would mate, I'd do the same for you too friend if you ever needed help. Appreciate it.
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    @Redemption it's a vaxhaul Corsa. I don't have a license or anything, it just sits in the drive. Don't really go near it that much, but it is there for me. My older brother was gonna sell it, so i decided to throw him a few hundred for it like a few months back, just in case i did get driving one day and got my license.

    I spent most of my life as a carer for my brother because of his violent meltdowns, and within a short period of his meltdowns no longer effecting my mum (eg. he doesn't attack her anymore), i'm no longer needed and start getting threatened with being kicked out. Sucks.

    Anyway Redemption, i really do appreciate your kind words. It's just a tricky situation for me, but I'll land on my feet. And I know you would mate, I'd do the same for you too friend if you ever needed help. Appreciate it.

    @DonnerKebab cool bro, could be a good project restoring it and getting it on the roads. I hope you can pass your test at some point soon. I just hope I don't sound ungrateful talking about some if my issues because sometimes they might be minor like I know stuff for you is so hard. It all sounds so tough, things will get better.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    Redemption wrote: »
    @Redemption it's a vaxhaul Corsa. I don't have a license or anything, it just sits in the drive. Don't really go near it that much, but it is there for me. My older brother was gonna sell it, so i decided to throw him a few hundred for it like a few months back, just in case i did get driving one day and got my license.

    I spent most of my life as a carer for my brother because of his violent meltdowns, and within a short period of his meltdowns no longer effecting my mum (eg. he doesn't attack her anymore), i'm no longer needed and start getting threatened with being kicked out. Sucks.

    Anyway Redemption, i really do appreciate your kind words. It's just a tricky situation for me, but I'll land on my feet. And I know you would mate, I'd do the same for you too friend if you ever needed help. Appreciate it.

    @DonnerKebab cool bro, could be a good project restoring it and getting it on the roads. I hope you can pass your test at some point soon. I just hope I don't sound ungrateful talking about some if my issues because sometimes they might be minor like I know stuff for you is so hard. It all sounds so tough, things will get better.

    @Redemption It's road worthy right now, but i just don't have a license so it's not really worth paying tax and insurance until i get one, so i had it put as SORN for the time being. And don't worry about that mate, everybody has issues. What issues another person has doesn't make your issues any less worse or impactful on you. They are still issues you need to vent about regardless.

    And you are right. Even in the hard times, there is hope things will get better. I can't see it right now where i'm at, but i know from past experience that even when your at rock bottom and you don't see any way things get better, they still can. It's about holding on until that time comes.
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    Redemption wrote: »
    @Redemption it's a vaxhaul Corsa. I don't have a license or anything, it just sits in the drive. Don't really go near it that much, but it is there for me. My older brother was gonna sell it, so i decided to throw him a few hundred for it like a few months back, just in case i did get driving one day and got my license.

    I spent most of my life as a carer for my brother because of his violent meltdowns, and within a short period of his meltdowns no longer effecting my mum (eg. he doesn't attack her anymore), i'm no longer needed and start getting threatened with being kicked out. Sucks.

    Anyway Redemption, i really do appreciate your kind words. It's just a tricky situation for me, but I'll land on my feet. And I know you would mate, I'd do the same for you too friend if you ever needed help. Appreciate it.

    @DonnerKebab cool bro, could be a good project restoring it and getting it on the roads. I hope you can pass your test at some point soon. I just hope I don't sound ungrateful talking about some if my issues because sometimes they might be minor like I know stuff for you is so hard. It all sounds so tough, things will get better.

    @Redemption It's road worthy right now, but i just don't have a license so it's not really worth paying tax and insurance until i get one, so i had it put as SORN for the time being. And don't worry about that mate, everybody has issues. What issues another person has doesn't make your issues any less worse or impactful on you. They are still issues you need to vent about regardless.

    And you are right. Even in the hard times, there is hope things will get better. I can't see it right now where i'm at, but i know from past experience that even when your at rock bottom and you don't see any way things get better, they still can. It's about holding on until that time comes.

    @DonnerKebab that's good, you have a road worthy car, like when you get a job, lessons you'll be set. Things will get better for both of us definitely, it's been a while for me but it will happen and same for you absolutely.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    edited June 15
    i don’t want to be here anymore 💔 *im safe.* i have no plans or anything. im just tired lol
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • RedemptionRedemption Community Connector Posts: 4,438 Community Veteran
    eylah wrote: »
    i don’t want to be here anymore 💔 *im safe.* i have no plans or anything. im just tired lol

    Im here if you need to talk about anything @eylah things will get better ❤️
  • RiverRiver Community Connector Posts: 4,161 Community Veteran
    I get body shamed and told to loose weight then my mum says we are going McDonald :/ now I’m being winged at for complaining
    Sometimes when the people most like you don't love you, it is a hurt that can cause the greatest pain, and this pain can lead you to hate everything.
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    edited June 15
    Sorry everybody. The Sea Kraken that is my mother decided to have another go and then asked for a tiny bit of help with my brother 😂 jolly good fun.

    @River they are talking utter shit when they body shame you. If they actually believed the crap they were saying about you, they wouldn't take you to McDonalds immediately afterwards. If you needed to lose weight as they claimed, you wouldn't be able to do Ariel hoop or any of those stunts you did with it. They are just being pricks for the sake of it. Don't listen to them bullying bastards.

    @eylah I'm so sorry your struggling right now with those sorts of feelings. You still are an amazing person and i'm here for you, like you have been here for me friend.

    @Redemption you're right bro. it'll happen for both of us. A job, driving, and then we'll be set to make our way in life. Have to weather the storm to get to sunnier shores is a saying i once heard.
    Post edited by DonnerKebab on
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @eylah hey, i'm here if you want to vent friend
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    im so fucking triggered 💔
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    @eylah hey, i'm here if you want to vent friend

    thankyou so much <3 it means a lot to me !!
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @eylah what's happened that's triggered you if you don't mind me asking?
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    edited June 15
    @eylah what's happened that's triggered you if you don't mind me asking?

    this person on tiktok laughing abt being in a mh crisis and taking piss out of me for getting her help. its fucking wrong on so many levels. 💔

    * im not in a mh crisis lol*
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @eylah that is just plain cruelty. Whoever it is, is targeting people who are nice and trying to help, and mocking them cruelly. They are mocking mental health crisis's, they are mocking people who try to do good things for others. That says everything about them that anybody needs to know. people like that, their opinions don't matter. I'm so sorry your going through this right now. <3
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    its horrible it rly is. i cant cope with trying to help ppl putting them before myself and i just get shit back for it. its fucking cruel man 💔
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 848 Part of The Mix Family
    @eylah it's one of the worst feelings in the world, not the worst, but one of the worst. I'm going through that feeling right now, having given up a normal life, a childhood and all my teenage years to help my mum and brother, got left emotionally stunted from it, only to be betrayed, which is all i can call it, earlier. But the thing is, as hard as it is to see, i can look in the mirror and say i helped. I did good regardless, and that makes me proud. And if i help even 1 person who needs it, then in my eye's that's a victory.

    You are an amazing person eylah, who has helped so many others. You tried to help this prick, this prick mocked you, but you did good trying to help somebody you thought was in need. Screw them for mocking you, you should be getting a round of applause for being so kind and helpful. please don't let these buggers change who you are.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 7,900 Master Poster
    sending you so many hugs 🫂 @DonnerKebab <3

    i have helped so many ppl in mh crisis i call emergency services which is scary for me and it triggers me and i tell them to reach out to the relevant ppl but they don’t and it stresses me out bc this girl is laughing at me and mocking me etc and sat on live ( tiktok ) and is taking piss. it’s frustrating for those who genuinely suffer and want help but ppl like this girl ruins it for us. im so stressed
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
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