Hospital called

Invisible_me

Rose113 wrote: »

@Sian321 shes gone 😭😭😭 mum just got home and told me 💔💔

@Rose113 , honestly I'm so sorry for your loss! And I know seriously how hard and difficult this is for you. Losing someone who means the world to you is so so hard, everything feels so broken and isolating 💔 everything and everyone feels so fake and nothing seems to bring comfort. It's like everything hyst makes things worse plus the pressure if being fake and strong around those who you perhaps don't even want to be around at this time.
The heavy crying and everything is wet- exactly! Let yourself havr that though to let it out. Don't hold it in- it's hurts! Look after yourself thoygh, domt make yourself ill, please. Your grandma still needs you to be the person she wants you to be - she'll let you feel the emotions but rise above it okay.
Your probably feeling everything, from sadness 😔, to anger 😠 to anxious 😟 and numb and that's all natural!! But she's free from suffering now and peace, there's nothing worse then watching them detoriate and them suffering in this decorating. It breaks your heart hoe fast people detoriatee and how much they suffer. It's horrible this way of world but we have to accept this.
Your grandma is still there for you just in a different way.
I'm writing this and trying not to cry mysrkf...
I'm always here!!

Rose113

Was meant to be in college today but can’t take it

eylah

Rose113 wrote: »

Was meant to be in college today but can’t take it

its understandable especially with everything thats going on for you rn. remember your not expected to do anything do stuff thats comfortable for you bc grief is rly hard ( im still learning to cope with it) but you have us here who will always be here for you sending hugs to you! ❤️

Rose113

Thank you @eylah

Rose113

I want to be with my grandma so she isn’t alone, I’m scared about what they’ve done with her now because she passed at the hospital so what they do now? I’ve known loads of people who have passed but this is the first time it’s been like this. I want to be with her, she was always good at taking this pain away 🥺 but now how’s gonna give me endless hugs and tell me how proud they are of me. Why did it have to be her, why couldn’t it have been me if someone had to go. My grandma would still be here

I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her, I need her 😭😭😭😭

PLEASE, I NEED HER HERE!!!!!!!😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

eylah

i can rly hear how much agony you are in rn rose and im truly sry from the bottom of my heart that your going through this right now. pls be kind to yourself bc you deserve it. do you have anyone who you could surround yourself with to distract yourself maybe? im here if you need to rant or anything bc i know how much it hurts losing someone so close to you. im here ok? your not alone ❤️

sinead276

i'm so sorry to hear about your grandma @Rose113 - i can't begin to imagine how you feel. like the others have said, there are no expectations for anything right now except focusing on yourself and being kind to your mind. although it hurts right now, a piece of her will always be in your heart and mind. she sounds like she was such an incredible woman.

we are all hear for you if you need somewhere to turn to to let emotions out or whatever else it may be.

sending you so many hugs

Rose113

My head hurts and I’m dizzy from crying

Rose113

Been lay in bed all day in the dark

eylah

sending you all my love im so sry today has been rly shit for you pls take gd care of yourself during this difficult time ❤️🫂

Rose113

Thank you @eylah i just ordered a tub of Ben n jerrys ice cream to eat in bed after dinner lmao

eylah

@Rose113 that sounds gd! i hope you can enjoy your ben & jerrys! what flavour did you go for? ❤️

Rose113

@eylah got cookie dough 💕

eylah

oh lovely! i hope you can enjoy your dinner & ice cream you deserve it ❤️

Invisible_me

@Rose113 , I hear how hard today has been for you and the desperateness in you to have her back. I wish this was something we have control over, but unfortunately it just isn't! But she's still here and there for you whenever you need, in a differentbway. What object, souvenir, advice she's given you that you can keep. Put it all together in a memory box and when you need her reach out to that box. It won't fill the void completely but hopefully still gives you a bit of her presence.
Also well done for getting one thing for yourself. Enjoy the cookie dough ice cream (best flavour in my opinion) 😋. Just little things to keep you going.

Rose113

TW// Caps

WHY ARE THEY ALL FORGETTING THAT SHE WAS MY FAMILY TOO!! YE IK SHE IS MY MUMS MUM BUT SHE IS ALSO MY GRANDMA AND ACTUALLY THE ONLY WOMAN THAT HAS EVER GIVEN A FUCKING CRAP ABOUT ME

Rose113

Crying again 😭😭😭😭

Rose113

😭😭🥺🥺💔💔🕊️🕊️🕊️

ebyrne556

Im so sorry to hear of ur loss @Rose113 we are here with u sending hugs

ella

@Rose113 - I am so incredibly sorry you lost your Grandma, I can really hear how important she was to you.

If your grief is manifesting in anger, please know that you have no responsibility to change this. Your only job is to allow it to happen and express it where you can. This might look like shouting, screaming, crying, punching a pillow, writing it down or letting it all out to someone you trust.

When I lost my Grandma this year, the best piece of advice someone gave me was "you've just got to feel all your feelings" and it's true. The only way out is through- like Going On A Bear Hunt (I hope you get that reference!)

All we need to do now is work out how you can feel these things in a safe way, would it be helpful to work on a short-term plan to help you get through this tricky time? It's a lot to be feeling, especially as Christmas is coming up.

Sending hugs to you @Rose113

Rose113

@ella i don’t know it’s all fucked with my head, didn’t sleep last night till 8am cos I was crying all night

All we need to do now is work out how you can feel these things in a safe way, would it be helpful to work on a short-term plan to help you get through this tricky time? It's a lot to be feeling, especially as Christmas is coming up.

yeah I suppose

Rose113

Why is it when things get so bad I just get so nauseous and then throw up I threw up 2 times this morning for some unknown reason

Invisible_me

Rose113 wrote: »

Why is it when things get so bad I just get so nauseous and then throw up I threw up 2 times this morning for some unknown reason

@Rose113 , I hear your struggles. Of course your going to be upset she was am important persom to you, it doesn't matter if she was your mums, mum grandparents play an important part of our lives. Besides, if they cared for you, gave you importance they are special to you and you woll grieve for them regardless if and where they stand in the family tree.

Sometimes lots of upset and crying can make me sick as well. I imagine things like eating and sleeping routinely has gone out the window as well so that can make you feel ill as well.

TheNightmare

We are all for you @Rose113 , we all help each other. Im here in PM's if you need too.

Rose113

My grandad started crying and my whole life I’ve never seen him cry so it’s broken my heart 💔

eylah

Rose113 wrote: »

My grandad started crying and my whole life I’ve never seen him cry so it’s broken my heart 💔

@Rose113 sending you so much love right now bc everything is so tough for you. sending you so many hugs 🫂

Invisible_me

Rose113 wrote: »

My grandad started crying and my whole life I’ve never seen him cry so it’s broken my heart 💔

Awww bless it would! It's hard seeing relatives bream down like that, and in a way it sinks into you more then and makes you see the void they've left is much much bigger.
Sending you strength, 💛