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🟩 Expert Q&A | Disordered eating during the holidays

JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,612 Part of The Furniture
edited December 2023 in Health & Wellbeing
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This Expert Q&A is all about disordered eating during the holidays and how to cope.

Respond to this thread with your questions (or click here to ask anonymously), and @BeatMegan will be online on Tuesday 12th and Thursday 14th to respond :)

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The expert
We'll be joined by @BeatMegan from Beat - the UK's eating disorder charity. I know lots of you are familiar with Beat, but you can click the spoiler below to learn more about them ⤵

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Our mission

We are the UK’s eating disorder charity. Founded in 1989 as the Eating Disorders Association, our mission is to end the pain and suffering caused by eating disorders.

What we do

Our national Helpline exists to encourage and empower people to get help quickly, because we know the sooner someone starts treatment, the greater their chance of recovery. People can contact us online or by phone 365 days a year. We listen to them, help them to understand the illness, and support them to take positive steps towards recovery.

We also support family and friends, equipping them with essential skills and advice, so they can help their loved ones recover whilst also looking after their own mental health. And we campaign to increase knowledge among healthcare and other relevant professionals, and for better funding for high-quality treatment, so that when people are brave enough to take vital steps towards recovery, the right help is available to them.

The work we do means that every year lives are saved, families are kept together, and people are able to live free of eating disorders.

The topic
Ask anything about disordered eating or how to cope with an ED during the holidays.

Eating disorders can be more challenging over the holidays for a variety of reasons, including spending more time in social spaces, having to eat certain kinds of food, and eating with other people.

As per the guidelines, please be mindful to avoid discussing:
  • Methods of purging
  • Methods of reducing appetite
  • How much or what you've consumed
  • Calories and nutritional info
  • Body measurements
  • Detailed accounts of exercise

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Respond to this thread with your questions (or click here to ask anonymously), and @BeatMegan will be online on Tuesday 12th and Thursday 14th to respond :)
All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
The truth resists simplicity.
Post edited by TheMix on
«1

Comments

  • TheMixTheMix Posts: 3,129 Boards Guru
    edited December 2023
    We've had an anonymous question from a member of the community, which I'll post down below:
    I feel as though lots of gifts that are given at Christmas time are food based and I find it really hard to react positively as those gifts are quite triggering for me. How should I react?
    Keep the questions coming, folx, and the wonderful @BeatMegan will be online on Tuesday and Thursday next week to share some thoughts.

    Take good care,
    Harry & the team
    Post edited by JustV on
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,612 Part of The Furniture
    edited December 2023
    Another anonymous question:
    How do you keep control of eating and not go back into your ED after/ during Christmas
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,612 Part of The Furniture
    I have a question too, but more about your experience at Beat. In your time as a Senior Advisor, you must have seen a lot! What would you say you get contacted about the most?
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,612 Part of The Furniture
    One more anonymous question:
    how can i avoid people asking why im not eating as much as them on christmas
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    Afternoon everyone
    I hope your all keeping warm this very cold Tuesday! <3
    Just a reminder we will have the wonderful @BeatMegan today in less than 5 minutes answering all your great questions and she will be here alongside myself till around 3pm :3
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    TheMix wrote: »
    We've had an anonymous question from a member of the community, which I'll post down below:
    I feel as though lots of gifts that are given at Christmas time are food based and I find it really hard to react positively as those gifts are quite triggering for me. How should I react?
    Keep the questions coming, folx, and the wonderful @BeatMegan will be online on Tuesday and Thursday next week to share some thoughts.

    Take good care,
    Harry & the team

    It can be really hard when you feel as though you have to act positively towards a gift that you find triggering and you’re absolutely right that Christmas can have a massive focus on food! If the gift is from someone you feel very comfortable with, it might be helpful to have a discussion with them to let them know you find these gifts triggering and to avoid them in future. If it’s someone you feel less comfortable with you might find it easier just to thank them and try and move on with the conversation. Just remember you should never feel guilty about the way you react, it’s completely valid!
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    Thanks so much Megan totally agree it can difficult but speaking to others about how you are feeling and explaining to them that you find it triggering can help
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    JustV wrote: »
    Another anonymous question:
    How do you keep control of eating and not go back into your ED after/ during Christmas

    Christmas can be a really tough time for anyone who struggles with their eating. If you worry about loosing control, it can help to create a plan for the day. If you feel prepared and know what you might be eating/ what time/ who will be there, this can help to ease some of that anxiety you might be feeling. Some people also find it helpful to plan some distractions for before, during and after meal times. If you are able to keep your mind occupied, this can help to calm down any eating disorder thoughts. These distractions could just be watching a film, playing a game, having a conversation that's not about food. There's some great advice on this page that you might find useful :)https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/news/coping-with-eating-disorder-christmas/
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    Thanks Megan those are some great tips shared by yourself and the article so hopefully members of thecommunity will have a look!
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    JustV wrote: »
    I have a question too, but more about your experience at Beat. In your time as a Senior Advisor, you must have seen a lot! What would you say you get contacted about the most?

    We get a real range of calls on our helpline! Some people call us as they're starting to struggle with their eating and want to know what support is out there for them, other people may have been struggling with an ED for years and need to speak to someone who understands. I would say the most common ED's we get contacted about tend to be Anorexia, Bulimia and Binge eating disorder but over the last year or so we've seen an increase in contacts about a lesser known ED called ARFID so we've started an ARFID support group. If anyone is interested you can find more information about the different types of ED here https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/about-eating-disorders/types/ and here's the link to our support groups https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/get-help-for-myself/i-need-support-now/online-support-groups/
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    JustV wrote: »
    One more anonymous question:
    how can i avoid people asking why im not eating as much as them on christmas

    This is definitely a common worry for anyone with an eating disorder so you're not alone in this! If there is anyone that you know will be with you on Christmas that you trust, it may be helpful to talk to them about this beforehand so they can be there to support you, even if that just means changing the subject if this is brought up. Some people with ED's find it easier if food is served in a buffet style (so you can serve yourself) this might help to take the focus off how much everyone is eating.

    If you do find you are having to deal with triggering comments on Christmas, don't feel bad if you need to take some time for yourself and do something that calms you down. In our support groups the other day we were talking about creating self soothe boxes for Christmas so this could be helpful :)https://www.youngminds.org.uk/young-person/blog/how-to-make-a-self-soothe-box/
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    A selfsoothing box sounds like a great idea Megan! I think i might give making one a go as well! Another question that I have is what is your favorutie part about working at Beat as a senior advisor and do you have any tips for anyone wanting to work in something similar like counselling etc <3 hope that makes sense
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    ebyrne556 wrote: »
    A selfsoothing box sounds like a great idea Megan! I think i might give making one a go as well! Another question that I have is what is your favorutie part about working at Beat as a senior advisor and do you have any tips for anyone wanting to work in something similar like counselling etc <3 hope that makes sense

    They're great aren't they! We all need a bit of self care sometimes :)

    Good question! I'm extremely passionate about mental health so I absolutely love my job. I'd say my favourite part of it is when you take a helpline call and you feel like you can give someone hope that they didn't have before. A lot of people who call us feel very stuck and alone in what they're going through so when you can support them and come up with a plan together, it's so rewarding!

    For anyone hoping to go into counselling/ the mental health field in future, I would say if you have chance to do some volunteering that will be a massive help! Lots of mental health charities offer volunteering placements and it helps you to get that experience in supporting people
  • Past UserPast User Posts: 0 The Mix Regular
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    We all do indeed! Aw thats brilliant thank you Megan.I agree getting some work or voluntary expereince is always a good way to get more insight and make a difference <3
    Another question I have for you is earlier on you talked about distraction techniques and i was just wondering if you have any examples of these or any links to any resources for members of our community who might not know how they can do this :)
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  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    edited September 18

    Hiya Faolan how are you? Thanks for popping in!
    Brilliant question!
    Just tagging @BeatMegan so she doesnt miss it
    Past User wrote: »
    Hello 😊

    What are some effective ways to offer support to someone with an eating disorder, and what should I avoid saying or doing to make sure I'm helpful and sensitive?

    Post edited by TheMix on
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    edited September 18
    Past User wrote: »
    Hello 😊

    What are some effective ways to offer support to someone with an eating disorder, and what should I avoid saying or doing to make sure I'm helpful and sensitive?

    Great question! It can definitely feel tricky to know the right things to say sometimes but here's some general tips you might find useful-

    Acknowledge to the person with the ED that they are not to blame and recognise how distressing the illness is for them

    Educate yourself about eating disorders where you can

    Ask them how they are feeling and what they are thinking, rather than making assumptions.

    Avoid discussing weight, shape, food, and diets in front of them, and model a balanced relationship with your own food and exercise if you can

    Remind yourself that things can change and reassure them that recovery is possible.

    Ask them what you can do to help – for example, helping them to stick to regular eating, putting in boundaries following mealtimes, having a space to talk about how they are feeling. They may respond that you can just “leave them alone” or that you can’t do anything to help, so here it can be helpful to remind them you can hear their distress and how difficult things are, and you are there if they need you
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    Really good tips to keep in mind!
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    ebyrne556 wrote: »
    We all do indeed! Aw thats brilliant thank you Megan.I agree getting some work or voluntary expereince is always a good way to get more insight and make a difference <3
    Another question I have for you is earlier on you talked about distraction techniques and i was just wondering if you have any examples of these or any links to any resources for members of our community who might not know how they can do this :)

    Absolutely @ebyrne556 :) it's important to find a distraction technique that works for you so it may be helpful to try a few different options! I've recently got into crocheting and I find it's a great way to relax and keep me focused on one thing. We have a page here that suggests different distractions you can use when you're in different moods because you might find that what helps you one day, won't work as well another day https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/about-eating-disorders/downloads-resources/blast-distraction-techniques/
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    100 percent agree Megan it does depend on the day Thank you so much for sharing the ideas im sure it will really help especially in the moment. Crochet looks amazing im a colouring person but def need to give it a go sometime!
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  • Past UserPast User Posts: 0 The Mix Regular
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    ebyrne556 wrote: »
    100 percent agree Megan it does depend on the day Thank you so much for sharing the ideas im sure it will really help especially in the moment. Crochet looks amazing im a colouring person but def need to give it a go sometime!

    Colouring is so relaxing too isn't it! Love just doing that and listening to music <3
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    edited September 18
    Past User wrote: »
    Oh that is such a helpful response. Thank you, I’ll keep all of that in mind.

    Thank you @BeatMegan & @ebyrne556 . I’ve learnt a lot here 😊

    Glad you've found it helpful :) if there's anything else I can help with just let me know
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    edited September 18
    Past User wrote: »
    Oh that is such a helpful response. Thank you, I’ll keep all of that in mind.

    Thank you @BeatMegan & @ebyrne556 . I’ve learnt a lot here 😊
    Awesome thanks to u for coming by @Past User if you have any other questions feel free to ask or if any come up durng the week @BeatMegan will be back on thursday at the same time
    Post edited by TheMix on
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  • Rose113Rose113 Community Champion Posts: 2,616 Boards Guru
    Want to hurt me… go ahead
    Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
    Want to talk crap about me…go on then
    Want to make me cry…feel free
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    Hiya @River How are you doing <3
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    For any who may be struggling with their eating and would like to know what support is out there, I'll just post a couple of options below.

    At Beat we have various support groups for different ED's and different age groups running every day of the week. They are chat room based so sort of similar to this and you don't need any diagnosis to join the groups, you can just go for whichever one feels most appropriate to you
    https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/get-help-for-myself/i-need-support-now/online-support-groups/

    If you’d like to find out what options you have for support and treatment in your area, you can put your postcode into our Helpfinder. This will show you NHS services, private options, counsellors, dieticians, charities and support groups.
    https://helpfinder.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/

    If you would like to get in touch with us at Beat, you are welcome to use our helplines, webchats or email.
    https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/get-help-for-myself/



  • Rose113Rose113 Community Champion Posts: 2,616 Boards Guru
    @ebyrne556 alive 🥲 how are u friend
    Want to hurt me… go ahead
    Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
    Want to talk crap about me…go on then
    Want to make me cry…feel free
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 53 Expert
    River wrote: »

    Hi River :) hope your okay, it's nice to have you with us
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