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People always act as if I'm a complete weirdo??
spacedog
Posts: 1,192 Wise Owl
It's been like this since I was a kid, don't really have much friends because I used to constantly get called weird in school and anytime I would try to talk to someone anytime they would get to know me they would back away because of the way I act - I don't know if it's me or what, it's kinda depressing. I don't know if it's because of how hyperactive I constantly am, I just feel like I'm constantly talked down to like primary school kid. I understand what's going on, I don't need people guiding me through life as if I can't do it on my own although I can be a wee bit slow at times. I just feel like because of my outside demeanor that I get treated like this, I really don't know
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I thank you @CaniceQ for responding so openly and supportively to @IainJammyboy. Did you find the counselling support helpful in what they said - would you like to share more with us about this? Is there anything you usually find helpful @IainJammyboy in managing these thoughts and feelings?
Oh no no no no, not him, not Andrew Tate
Though I do find it quite depressing and invalidating when people reject me, I rather be rejected for being myself than being something else to be loved. Being myself makes me feel like a whole person than just a person, and I believe this is the most satisfying thing to be and achieve in life.
When people do reject me, I typically react with "Oh well, that's expected. It's a good thing that I avoid a false friendship that will exhaust me", then I would give myself some 'me' time so to allow my dejection to heal (for me I do this by doing my hobbies, watching shows/playing games that are close to my heart or give me hope in forming connections, and just doing simply fun activities), then I try to reenter society. What I have said makes this sound so simple but in actuality, it is quite a struggle. The main thing I keep in mind, which helps me feel less bad, is to know that if I exist that there are others like me and you who exist and feels the same way. As my counsellor said, you're probably not surrounded by the right people but that doesn't mean you cannot find someone to connect with; that someone is one you'll meet later in your life journey. The only thing you can do is to wait for the person but also seek them by seeking opportunities which can help you and your potential friends to encounter each other.
Perhaps it may be a bit easier for me to deal with loneliness because I do really enjoy being left alone for long periods of time, it feels quite relaxing and energizing. Though, I do need to talk to someone sometimes since I believe humans are social beings (not in terms of being 'social' but requiring human contact at times).
Anyways, I'm glad that I do have a space to be in just in case I really do need someone to talk to, so thank you @Amy22 and @Laura_tigger82
I can hear that it is a struggle to try and re-enter society - could you explain a bit more about how you feel during that process? I can understand that it's not easy, but I'm glad to hear that you keep trying in connecting with people. I do hope you can find "your people" in time that you can click with!
I kind of always knew I'm weird by the way people treat me. Back in secondary school I heard way too many people talk about me being this and that and how weird I am. There was literally a running joke among them where they thought I was constantly plotting against them xD
I tried my best to fit in but I didn't know how. I generally spent most of my time watching everyone, just looking at how everyone interacts with each other and are all having fun without me. I don't think people knew how much I liked them just by being there, they must have thought I secretly hated everyone or just didn't care, but many were nice to me regardless.
Then came prom, the day I truly saw how much I didn't fit in. I just watched as everyone had so much fun, no one really talked to me or cared that I was really there. It was really not a place for me. (I have a slightly embarrassing story from prom but I'm not sure if I feel like sharing it now lol). I hated prom... would totally go again. And as everyone finally separated, and I got home, I literally cried that evening. I promised myself that I will change, open up to people and try to talk with them more. But then college has passed, where I still didn't get along with anyone (beside the one friend that I knew beforehand, but he didn't care much about me either). Now I'm 2 years into uni, and I'm starting to believe that I will never have real friends, I am just too 'different' and not good with people at all.
That's why I spend so much time on the mix, I love being here because its a place I feel like I fit in (even though I have a feeling some of you still think I'm weird haha, even if you say otherwise), at least I can't get judged on my voice or appearance.
I feel like I'm the opposite here, I feel like people talk to me expecting me to be very knowledgeable, but I actually do need someone to guide me through this life. Its something I've realised recently as I've always been rejecting any help while thinking "I don't need people guiding me through life as if I can't do it on my own". Btw I'm not saying you @IainJammyboy actually need help, I'm saying that help is something I know I've always needed.
Yes, I'm exactly the same! Though your 'atypical' language, @CaniceQ, is probably very different to my 'atypical' language haha.
Usually when I try to say something most people will ignore me or not even show any sign that they're listening. When I do finally get a chance to speak, people will often just interrupt me and not care one bit that I'm not done talking. Though in the rare situations where they do listen to what I have to say, they will often tell me stuff like "omg you're so wise" or "omg you're so funny" (when I say a joke for example) and I just think to myself "well what is the point of me being so wise when no one ever listens to me?"
This applies to everyone; family, friends and even strangers. What is it about me that this is how I get treated?
This, its so true. It seems like everyone I meet is so selfish and rude for absolutely no apparent reason.
I was thinking about this a lot, girls seem to be so much kinder and accepting compared to guys. And even though I haven't really talked to much girls irl (I'm always either too nervous of shy for some reason lol) I seem to get along with them much more. That could play a part in why I like talking here so much, this place is very female-dominated after all. I always knew I was a girl at heart xD
If it makes you feel any better, I still haven't been in a single relationship in my life... You're not alone. "Love will find you one day" they say... the only thing that's finding me is the spider that's been sitting in the corner of my room for like a week now -_-
Anyways, I'm done rambling, sorry for writing so much as usual. Sending hugs to you all
Being "normal" or "seemingly put together" is overrated. Everyone wants to be unique or different which then in turn is being like everyone else. But not to sound like a quote from a grandmothers stitch work, but being yourself regardless of others is the best thing you can do. Finding that sense of community of people who support and cherish you for who you are is so rewarding and you'll find that community eventually. From simply reading this thread, I've learned that you've got something worthwhile to you, don't let it be labled as "weird", honestly let it shine and say fuck em!
It's important to surround yourself with people who accept and appreciate you for who you are. While it may take time to find genuine connections, there are understanding and empathetic individuals out there who will appreciate your unique qualities.