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Work meal 😬

DandelionDandelion Posts: 1,911 Extreme Poster
I’m going out with some colleagues for a meal tomorrow after work as someone is leaving. I’m really nervous about it, don’t really know why I get on with them, I’m just scared it will be awkward as it’s the first time I’ve really been out with them outside of work. I’m really regretting saying that I’ll go because it’s making me feel nervous but at the same time I want to go, so idk how to feel
The steps you take don’t need to be big, they just need to take you in the right direction. 

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    AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 1,914 Extreme Poster
    I think it's still good to go :) It's nice to say goodbye when someone goes (as we'd appreciate it when we leave too!), and you'll have the chance to get to know them a bit better outside of the work environment. Enjoy yourself and give it a good go - worst-case scenario, you decide that you don't really want to hang out with them outside work in future x
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    KatKat Posts: 81 Budding Regular
    Hiya @Dandelion
    I completely understand how you are feeling. You say this is your first time meeting up with your colleagues outside of work. Naturally trying something for the first time can be really scary. Try to rationalise any anxious thoughts you are having; when you start to get anxious remind yourself that: 1. you get on with your colleagues
    2. being nervous is natural.
    It also might be a good idea to try breathing exercises as these can help counter the anxious feeling and help to keep you in the present moment. the 4-7-8 breathing technique is to inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds and exhale for 8 seconds.
    You could also try another calming technique in which you name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. It should help to ground you in the present and calm the anxiety.
    You say that you want to go, so go for it ! It could be a really positive step to help you to build friendships.
    I hope this helps a little and you have a great time <3
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    DandelionDandelion Posts: 1,911 Extreme Poster
    Update: just back from the meal, it was so much fun and not awkward at all I had a really good time and I’m really happy that I went
    The steps you take don’t need to be big, they just need to take you in the right direction. 
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,548 Skive's The Limit
    Aw good to hear!

    On Saturday I’m going bowling with some peoples from work and haven’t been with work people outside of work and I’m scared too
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    DandelionDandelion Posts: 1,911 Extreme Poster
    Shaunie wrote: »
    Aw good to hear!

    On Saturday I’m going bowling with some peoples from work and haven’t been with work people outside of work and I’m scared too

    I’m sure it’ll be fine, I was so worried about nothing. I hope you have a good time 😊
    The steps you take don’t need to be big, they just need to take you in the right direction. 
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    RuhRuh Posts: 48 Boards Initiate
    Scares me too! As u have to make small talk especially if you don’t know them too well! But I guess u have to start somewhere and if there is a bunch of u it’s easier I guess
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