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Struggling

24

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    I feel ok about it because hopefully they won't section me because I'm happy to go informal x
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,612 Part of The Furniture
    edited September 18
    Glad they reached you in the end @Past User. :3 How are the urges feeling at the moment?
    Post edited by TheMix on
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,687 Skive's The Limit
    Really glad youd be willing to accept help <3 shows lot of strength. Will be following your thread and seeing how you get on, really hope things improve soon <3
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 287 The Mix Regular
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User

    It might take some time for the urges to pass but at least you are safe and have on sight support for when you need it
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • AoifeAoife Community Manager Posts: 3,228 Boards Guru
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User, 

    I just wanted to echo what everyone else has said and say that you have so much strength <3. 

    How has everything been these last few days? Hope you're doing okay :) 

    Post edited by TheMix on
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    Things have been ok the last few days but I have a terrible cough and cold and my whole body keeps on shaking (maybe that is a side affect from the medication I'm on). I'm allowed out because I am informal but the first 72hours I have to be escorted.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    edited October 2019
    Hey Lubna, 

    It's positive to hear that things have been okay for the past few days, although I hope you feel better soon!  :)

    I am glad that you have some support currently also, keep us updated on how things are going, we really care about you  <3

    Massive hugs,

    Jade
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 123 The Mix Convert
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User
    Sorry to hear that you had a horrible cold, how are you feeling now?

    We are all here for you and so inspired at how incredibly strong you are.
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    Been discharged today and struggling😥 already took an od. My cough and cold is better though thankyou!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    edited September 18
    Hey there @Past User

    It sounds like things are still really difficult for you, I'm glad that your cough and cold are better though!

    You mentioned that you took an overdose, have you been able to tell anyone else about this? and if so, have had any support from anyone after it?  <3

    How are you feeling about being discharged?  :)

    I've just put some crisis resources in the spoiler below if you need them!

    - Crisis Messenger are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text 'THEMIX' to 85258 and talk to them about anything. 

    -Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123. They also have some online services here. 

    - Papyrus have a helpline that is open 9am – 10pm weekdays and 2pm – 10pm on weekends. You can call them on 0800 068 4141. 

    -If you have any concerns for your health or safety, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E.  


    You are doing incredibly well and well done for opening up too us here, keep fighting x

    - Jade 

    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    I told someone but havent recieved any support from it.

    I'm feeling ok after being discharged because I understand hospital is'nt a long term thing.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User

    It sounds like you understand that being in hospital isn't a long term solution, i'm sorry that you didn't receive any support after your overdose however I'm glad that you was able to tell someone about it.  <3

    How are you feeling today?  :)

    - Jade
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    edited November 2019
    Not feeling that great. I'm at a friends house. I was reffered to the Home treatment team on Thursday after being discharged from hospital but I havent evan seen them because I was at my mums over the weekend and now I'm at a friends house but she wont let the HTT to come in her house because she is really paranoid about the way her house is and I cancelled an appointment today because the people in my brain are so annoying😥
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 274 The Mix Regular
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User

    Lush to hear that you've been at your mates' and mum's places. 

    Sounds like you are interested in being involved with the HTT, does the HTT visit any location you give them or does it have to be the same place (e.g. your mum's) every week?  

    Throughout all of this thread you have come across measured and mature in your self-awareness and responses. Do your friends help keep you grounded? What do you get up to with them - music, sport, exploring? 
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    The HTT are coming to my friends house at 11. She said she dosent mind her house for a change. I'm nervous they are going to section me and I'm going to wales in a couple of weeks so I can't be sectioned again. I've only been out for one week too.

    We listen to music and watch tv.
  • AoifeAoife Community Manager Posts: 3,228 Boards Guru
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User how did everything go with HTT in the end? 

    I hope you're doing okay, sending you lots of hugs <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    It went okay with the HTT on Thursday they said they'de be back round with a doctor on Friday which they did but my friend told them I wasent here (I asked her too tell them that) and they told her they'de be back round today but I don't want to see them especially a doctor as a doctor can section you. They rang me lastnight and I said I don't want to see them and they said they'de ring me today😔 so we'll see. I'm just isolating myself instead of engaging with the support because of the people in my head😫
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    Hey Lubna :heart:

    Just wanted to pop on to send you some hugs and let you know we are here for you and care about you :heart:

    Sorry to hear that your isolating yourself, do you want to talk more about that? 

    It's positive that your reaching out for support on here :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    I am not answering most calls because I think people are listening to me and I am avoiding seeing a doctor in fear of getting sectioned again so I am isloating myself from my cpn, my mum and the HTT.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    My friend is annoying me too😫 her and her partner was going to break up this morning and I asked if it was anything to do with me and she said no and she cant deal with the guilt with me just for asking the question🤔 what about the guilt I feel!? My friend said I bent down and you could see my cleavage the other day and I did it lastnight so I said sorry (maybe I shouldnt of mentioned it) I don't know she hasent said and I held my hand out whilst I was doing something I was helding my hand out for my lighter but it looked like I was holding my hand out for something else (I think anyone would think the same!) So I felt very wrong lastnight my head kept repeating that I was wrong but my friend hasent said if I was or not. We havent had that chat yet. So are you not wondering why I asked if they was going to break up because of me?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    I really could do with some company😭 I feel like self harming
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    Fuck the HTT they havent rang or been round today.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    😭😭😭

    My friend just kicked me out because she accused me of turning her hobs on so I finally shouted at her and she shouted in my ear so I slapped her and she has kicked me out. I have no money because I have spent my money on my friend (mostly) so I have just rang my mum crying and she has transferred me enough money to get home but I'm having proper bad suicidal ideas.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    Still having bad suicidal ideas. Tried self harming but that is hardly doing anything and I've hunted the house. #funnightahead
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    edited September 18
    Hey there @Past User

    It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now, so i'm sending hugs your way.  <3

    You mentioned that your friend kicked you out, that doesn't  sound like a nice situation to be in, have you been able to speak to her today since what happened this morning? 

    You also said that you are having suicidal thoughts and ideas, is there anyone that you can reach out to tonight to keep yourself safe?  <3

    I've popped some crisis resources below that may be of use tonight,

    - Crisis Messenger are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text 'THEMIX' to 85258 and talk to them about anything. 

    - Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123. They also have some online services here. 

    - Papyrus have a helpline that is open 9am – 10pm weekdays and 2pm – 10pm on weekends. You can call them on 0800 068 4141. 

    - If you have any concerns for your health or safety, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E.  


    Also, this website - http://www.nshn.co.uk/downloads/Distractions.pdf  has some really good distractions for self harm which you may find helpful as well!

    You are really strong, keep fighting  <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    edited November 2019
    Nope I havent spoken to my friend since she kicked me out this morning. 

    I have told my mum I have self harmed and she is calling the HTT now.

    Luckily I have no money otherwise I would of gone somewhere to end my life by now.

    HTT told my mum they only come out between 8am and 8pm🤔 I'll just have no sleep again then and told my mum for me to call an ambulance I aint sitting in A&E for hours just cause I have self-harmed.

    [edited by moderator] 
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    HTT are here. I heard them say "talking to herself and bizzare behaviour" and they don't want to leave me but the nurse keeps on going outside on the phone so idk.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 496 Listening Ear
    I don't know if to text my friend to say I'm sorry for slapping her or not.
  • Lauren223Lauren223 Staff Posts: 71 Budding Regular
    edited September 18

    Hi @Past User!

     

    I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been through a really difficult time lately. Echoing what has already been said, it’s a really positive step you’ve been able to reach out and be so open about how you’re feeling and ask for help.

     

    How are you feeling after the visit from HTT? It can be quite daunting having the HTT visit when we’re not in a good place, but they’re there to support you through this, just like we are <3

     

    I can see that you’re not sure if you should text your friend to say sorry for slapping her, whilst I can’t tell you what you should and shouldn’t do, I can suggest doing whatever makes you happy and comfortable doing! How do you think you would feel texting your friend?

     

    Wishing you all the best <3

    Lauren


    Post edited by TheMix on
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