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Post of the month - March
TheMix
Posts: 3,130 Boards Guru
Hey everyone,
It's time to vote on your Post of the Month winner for March! Here's the nominations:
1. @Shaunie 's thread 'Using analogies/metaphors to help explain/understand'
2. @Kathleen0172 's reply in 'I give up I'm done'
3. @Bubblesgoesboo 's reply in 'Don't know why I even bother'
You've all been so amazing supporting each other on the boards which is so lovely to see
Remember to keep a look out for posts to nominate this month. You can nominate a post by flagging it, selecting Report, and then choosing 'Post of the Month nomination' as the reason.
Aife & the team
It's time to vote on your Post of the Month winner for March! Here's the nominations:
1. @Shaunie 's thread 'Using analogies/metaphors to help explain/understand'
---- Hope this is in right place
This maybe bit of a weird post for some(?) then do ignore me loool for some people this doesnt help but i do love a good analogy to describe how i am feeling so i wanted to share them with others so maybe it can help them to better understand/explain it to someone else if feel similar. & i find understanding helps me deal with it a bit better. Most of these are what i have read/been told else where - not all of what ive thought off. & share some if know any cause i find them very interesting & relateable & so helpful. May make no sense cause all see/feel differently----
So when overwhelmed - i like to see it as we all have buckets in our head - when something goes wrong, it goes in your bucket if you do not deal with it & ignore it - it stays there - then it keeps adding up. Until it reaches the top. Then something 'small' like missing your bus makes you have a break down. Not because they have missed their bus but because their bucket is full and "cant cope" with anymore. And some extreme things could be in there - so when go to therapy/tell someone - it can feel worse - at start - as tried to ignore it but then after while would fee better that not having it weighing down. As had to gets worse before gets better sometimes.
For your moods/depression - its been been describe to me that sometimes when you wake up in the morning - you have the most heaviest dog (forgotten the name of it-maybe was just lots of black dogs) on you - that you can not move at all(depression). But then some days you could have a labrador on your chest - can feel it & took a bit of effort to move but did move it. Or some people just wake up with a puppy on them - takes no effort really -so can move it but could still stay in bed sometimes- but only because its comfortable & what you want. And that could go onto day with the lead and control your own emotions
(execpt for my actual dog - he pulls so much on the lead so thats more hard to visualise for me lol)
For anxiety i think about it as a car alarm that goes off everytime somene goes past it rather than it only going off when someones breaking in.
For borderline personality disorder - i have read the usual third degree burns but i also like the description/imagery of it is like you’re driving a car on bumpy road at high speed cause have a very sensitive accelerator & the slightest touch makes the car race forward, but the car’s brakes are unreliable. And can end up crashed & dead. But can learn techniquies to make the breaks more reliable and manage it(your moods).
Someone with an eating disorder may ask for help & then deny that they want it, like someone who has an intruder in their home & calls 999 but when help arrives, finds that the intruder is standing behind their back with a gun, forcing them to say everything is allright after all. But After some time living with the illness & giving up hope of being rescued, may start thinking of the intruder as a protector (the ED), believing that it is better to live with the eating disorder than to give it up for some thing that may make it worse or not work. But there is a better life.
For recovery i like to see it as a roap trip in the sense that when we hit "bump in road"/ "relapse" - though 'relapse' sounds like restarting all the way from begining but you dont start your road trip right from the begining - all the things in the past are still there of what you have learnt. Or could make wrong desicion/ go in wrong direction but then okay as can still get to where you want but may take longer but still going to where you want just not how the way you initinally wanted.
I also think that a lot times we treat the symptoms of mental illnesses more than the cause. Medication does that and coping skills. I mean it works temparly so i see it as thats like cutting the top of a plant you dont want and it keeps growing back & not finding the rot/cause
I find are better/clear ways to look at things
This maybe bit of a weird post for some(?) then do ignore me loool for some people this doesnt help but i do love a good analogy to describe how i am feeling so i wanted to share them with others so maybe it can help them to better understand/explain it to someone else if feel similar. & i find understanding helps me deal with it a bit better. Most of these are what i have read/been told else where - not all of what ive thought off. & share some if know any cause i find them very interesting & relateable & so helpful. May make no sense cause all see/feel differently----
So when overwhelmed - i like to see it as we all have buckets in our head - when something goes wrong, it goes in your bucket if you do not deal with it & ignore it - it stays there - then it keeps adding up. Until it reaches the top. Then something 'small' like missing your bus makes you have a break down. Not because they have missed their bus but because their bucket is full and "cant cope" with anymore. And some extreme things could be in there - so when go to therapy/tell someone - it can feel worse - at start - as tried to ignore it but then after while would fee better that not having it weighing down. As had to gets worse before gets better sometimes.
For your moods/depression - its been been describe to me that sometimes when you wake up in the morning - you have the most heaviest dog (forgotten the name of it-maybe was just lots of black dogs) on you - that you can not move at all(depression). But then some days you could have a labrador on your chest - can feel it & took a bit of effort to move but did move it. Or some people just wake up with a puppy on them - takes no effort really -so can move it but could still stay in bed sometimes- but only because its comfortable & what you want. And that could go onto day with the lead and control your own emotions
(execpt for my actual dog - he pulls so much on the lead so thats more hard to visualise for me lol)
For anxiety i think about it as a car alarm that goes off everytime somene goes past it rather than it only going off when someones breaking in.
For borderline personality disorder - i have read the usual third degree burns but i also like the description/imagery of it is like you’re driving a car on bumpy road at high speed cause have a very sensitive accelerator & the slightest touch makes the car race forward, but the car’s brakes are unreliable. And can end up crashed & dead. But can learn techniquies to make the breaks more reliable and manage it(your moods).
Someone with an eating disorder may ask for help & then deny that they want it, like someone who has an intruder in their home & calls 999 but when help arrives, finds that the intruder is standing behind their back with a gun, forcing them to say everything is allright after all. But After some time living with the illness & giving up hope of being rescued, may start thinking of the intruder as a protector (the ED), believing that it is better to live with the eating disorder than to give it up for some thing that may make it worse or not work. But there is a better life.
For recovery i like to see it as a roap trip in the sense that when we hit "bump in road"/ "relapse" - though 'relapse' sounds like restarting all the way from begining but you dont start your road trip right from the begining - all the things in the past are still there of what you have learnt. Or could make wrong desicion/ go in wrong direction but then okay as can still get to where you want but may take longer but still going to where you want just not how the way you initinally wanted.
I also think that a lot times we treat the symptoms of mental illnesses more than the cause. Medication does that and coping skills. I mean it works temparly so i see it as thats like cutting the top of a plant you dont want and it keeps growing back & not finding the rot/cause
I find are better/clear ways to look at things
2. @Kathleen0172 's reply in 'I give up I'm done'
Hey Jelly I'm so sorry to read this.
I'm so sorry to read this.Just wanted to echo what Shaunie said. It sucks that people said that to your manager - and I think it's unfair when they don't even know the bigger picture (which is that you were suicidal and felt you should be in public). It sounds like you're feeling pretty let down and hurt?:(
Your feelings are totally understandable, bud - just know that you should look after yourself, and you do deserve to be part of society.
It also sounds like you've been really struggling in general? Sending love and hugs
I truly think you've been strong - by trying to pull your life back together, going out so you couldn't act on your thoughts, and just holding on.
I hope you're feeling calmer now. Remember help is always there. Speak to somewhere like crisis messenger or samaritans if/whenever you need to. We care and are here
3. @Bubblesgoesboo 's reply in 'Don't know why I even bother'
I don't know what to say but just want to send hugs, I think I know what you're going through, just say if I'm wrong, but this is what a friend said to me, I feel you would benefit from hearing it too. (Also mods delete if I'm not allowed to quote a friend)
'But we are not victims, we are survivors. And the biggest fuck you we can give to them is to turn round and say you know what, you may have violated me and made me feel worthless and dirty. You may have been able to walk away free without nightmares and memories and flashbacks. And all of that could have killed me but it didn’t and it won’t. I am stronger. What you did was wrong but I am not weak. And while I may never be whole again I will not allow you to take anything more from me. I will fight. And I will win. You may have tried to break me but I will show you how enormously you failed. '
You've all been so amazing supporting each other on the boards which is so lovely to see
Remember to keep a look out for posts to nominate this month. You can nominate a post by flagging it, selecting Report, and then choosing 'Post of the Month nomination' as the reason.
Aife & the team
Post of the month - March 11 votes
Shaunie
54%
6 votes
Kathleen
18%
2 votes
Bubblesgoesboo
27%
3 votes
Post edited by TheMix on
0
Comments
Well done to all the nominees too. Keep up the amazing support!
- Aife